Hello Lavika,
Thanks for sharing all this, I agreed that they are really applicable. I got few (2-3) employees as bit arrogant having mail ego, they think themselves very superior. Though I was polite with them for ever but they gave a negative feedback. They never come to me for any query regarding leave or late but go to their immediate boss, even don't talk to me. Every month when I take one to one meeting they come as if formality with no complaints and suggestions. Then how can I interact with them.
From India, Bhopal
7Thanks for sharing all this, I agreed that they are really applicable. I got few (2-3) employees as bit arrogant having mail ego, they think themselves very superior. Though I was polite with them for ever but they gave a negative feedback. They never come to me for any query regarding leave or late but go to their immediate boss, even don't talk to me. Every month when I take one to one meeting they come as if formality with no complaints and suggestions. Then how can I interact with them.
From India, Bhopal
Hi Deepti,
These type of persons exists almost in every organization.You need to tackle with them very carefully.
If these employees are coming late and having casual approach,discuss with them about but if it remains the same,Discuss it with their reporting manager or HOD in the presence of your Hod.
It will create a positive impact as you tried your best to communicate with employees but if they were not listening then only you had to approach their senior.But
even after it they are having same approach,write a mail keeping their reporting manager and MD in loop that you have given them verbal indications about their casual approach but you are not seeing any improvement thus you are writing this warning mail..
Thus you will convey your message and moreover MD will come to know that you are doing your work sincerely and not biased.And I hope he will also suggest some wayout but before drafting a mail contact your MD and make him aware about the situation so that you may remain in safe side later on.
Good Luck !!!!
From India, Mohali
These type of persons exists almost in every organization.You need to tackle with them very carefully.
If these employees are coming late and having casual approach,discuss with them about but if it remains the same,Discuss it with their reporting manager or HOD in the presence of your Hod.
It will create a positive impact as you tried your best to communicate with employees but if they were not listening then only you had to approach their senior.But
even after it they are having same approach,write a mail keeping their reporting manager and MD in loop that you have given them verbal indications about their casual approach but you are not seeing any improvement thus you are writing this warning mail..
Thus you will convey your message and moreover MD will come to know that you are doing your work sincerely and not biased.And I hope he will also suggest some wayout but before drafting a mail contact your MD and make him aware about the situation so that you may remain in safe side later on.
Good Luck !!!!
From India, Mohali
This is right being a professional person your communication skill should be very good and it is understandable for others.
From India
From India
From what you describe, two things emerge. One, there is gap between what you are doing and what is expected of you. Is there a clear job role and description in your company ?( I ask this because it is a relatively small company). Get your boss to clarify those expectations from the HR job role - he needs to firm that up first. Obviously, the KRAs, KPIs and MOPs are involved, and these should be frozen for all the positions. You talk of 1-on-1 but if he talks about you openly in a 1-to-several meeting, it is not fair unless the above KRAs/KPIs/MOPs are frozen and made known to the rest of the staff as to what exactly is your role. Having said that, as HR executive, you need to maintain a congenial and positive frame of mind with every individual. Remember no one is totally wrong - there are elements of the good in everyone. One experience or a set of circumstances often vitiate views and perceptions about another individual. As HR, you need to work that much harder to present a positive front to your staff. The gap between perception and reality is a challenge. We are not what we think we are, it is what others think about us that matter to them. The oxymoron \"perception is reality\" is so true. Therefore, consciously work on the feedbacks which you have received from your staff, possibly with help from your boss. I am assuming here that your boss is favorably disposed to you.
Hope this helps. If you are in Mumbai, you are welcome to contact me on landline 66231138. I work at Lower Parel.
From India, Coimbatore
Hope this helps. If you are in Mumbai, you are welcome to contact me on landline 66231138. I work at Lower Parel.
From India, Coimbatore
Dear Deepti,
I appreciate you taking this constructively. It can be tough when so many people give you negative feedback that too in your first few months in the organisation. First step towards improving your behavior/ image is by accepting that there is something to be improved. So you've already taken the first step and that is a big plus. The next is to find out what is it that they find rude or biased in your behavior. A good place to start would be by asking each one of them in a one-on-one what they found rude. However, please ensure that the questions you ask are the right ones and in the right tone else it could come out like you are being defensive (though that may not be your intention) or aggressive. In any conversation, the tone matters a lot! So please be aware of the tone that you use when you ask these questions. Here are a few questions to get you started.
The questions could be along these lines.
I received a lot of feedback from everyone on my abilities and skills and would like to improve with your help. Would you like to help me?
wait for the answer. If yes, ask if now is a good time to have a 1-on-1 and if yes continue, if not, fix a time and be punctual for it.
Thank the person for their tie when the feedback session starts.
Questions
1. What about my behaviour/ skill/ knowledge did you find abrasive/ not up to the mark?
2. Ask for specific examples.....could you give me some example of what you thought was rude behaviour.
3. Dig for more information. Keep digging until you are sure that that is the real reason. So for example if someone says... Oh! it's just the way you speak, it is so rude! Ask- What about the way I speak do you find rude? (keep your voice calm... you are trying to discover and not to fight... tone is important). If they say your talk too loudly, ask " so if I speak a little softer, do you think I will not sound rude?" If they say oh, I don't know... ask " What else about my voice sounds rude?". Keep digging until you come to the real reason.
4. Don't get angry or upset by the examples that they give. Don't try to justify immediately. Listen. LISTEN. listen! Don't process. Just absorb.
5. At the end of the conversation, ask So if these aspects of my behavior/ skill/ knowledge change do you think I will be able to perform my job better?
It would be a good idea to write down the important aspects of the conversation so that you don't forget any crucial part of it.
Once you have the information, make a plan to improve on those aspects maybe even one at a time. Handling everything at once might be over whelming and there's a chance that you might give up!
You are on the right path... Keep up the good work. All the best. you can mail me for more information on
Rupa
From India, Mumbai
I appreciate you taking this constructively. It can be tough when so many people give you negative feedback that too in your first few months in the organisation. First step towards improving your behavior/ image is by accepting that there is something to be improved. So you've already taken the first step and that is a big plus. The next is to find out what is it that they find rude or biased in your behavior. A good place to start would be by asking each one of them in a one-on-one what they found rude. However, please ensure that the questions you ask are the right ones and in the right tone else it could come out like you are being defensive (though that may not be your intention) or aggressive. In any conversation, the tone matters a lot! So please be aware of the tone that you use when you ask these questions. Here are a few questions to get you started.
The questions could be along these lines.
I received a lot of feedback from everyone on my abilities and skills and would like to improve with your help. Would you like to help me?
wait for the answer. If yes, ask if now is a good time to have a 1-on-1 and if yes continue, if not, fix a time and be punctual for it.
Thank the person for their tie when the feedback session starts.
Questions
1. What about my behaviour/ skill/ knowledge did you find abrasive/ not up to the mark?
2. Ask for specific examples.....could you give me some example of what you thought was rude behaviour.
3. Dig for more information. Keep digging until you are sure that that is the real reason. So for example if someone says... Oh! it's just the way you speak, it is so rude! Ask- What about the way I speak do you find rude? (keep your voice calm... you are trying to discover and not to fight... tone is important). If they say your talk too loudly, ask " so if I speak a little softer, do you think I will not sound rude?" If they say oh, I don't know... ask " What else about my voice sounds rude?". Keep digging until you come to the real reason.
4. Don't get angry or upset by the examples that they give. Don't try to justify immediately. Listen. LISTEN. listen! Don't process. Just absorb.
5. At the end of the conversation, ask So if these aspects of my behavior/ skill/ knowledge change do you think I will be able to perform my job better?
It would be a good idea to write down the important aspects of the conversation so that you don't forget any crucial part of it.
Once you have the information, make a plan to improve on those aspects maybe even one at a time. Handling everything at once might be over whelming and there's a chance that you might give up!
You are on the right path... Keep up the good work. All the best. you can mail me for more information on
Rupa
From India, Mumbai
Dear Deepti,
I favor Das Sajal. Also the other have put in great pieces of advice. I believe you need some step by step action plan and so this comment.
Now I would suggest you to look into the psychology of a 'closed group' inside your small company before you let them attack you with written feed backs. These are reports and you cannot keep for yourself. Next issue comes up and this might be on your Manager's desk, a solid proof to confirm action for they did this once and they will do this again. In your case what you should perceive from what Mr. Ramanan rightfully quoted above; 'nobody kicks a dead dog', is that someone kicks because they want it dead and out cold.
I suggest that the best strategy right now would be stepping back and acknowledging to your Manager that you have realized what went wrong. Remember to put a big smile on your face and not that of a grounded person when you say this to him. Thank your peers with a smile for they have brought it to your attention in a written statement and close the case now. Buy time.
Some questions you need to look into would be... Was your predecessor a much senior female? Or are you little too younger than the problematic group? Is your language far too good with structured vocabulary? If any of these are true, that could be a reason to corner you.
I suggest you make a list of the people who have conned you. Call up and talk once again to your predecessor. Get personal feed backs in their individual cases and 'write' them down. Make a character profile and try to figure out a way specifically for each person before you go ahead. Make a check list of what changes you have brought in the last 2 months. (include everything involving tea breaks or smoking or anything). If you have done this you might understand who you have offended and where this wave comes from. Now go to each of them, smile and spot the ones who avoids eye contacts with you. Rearrange the list and group the ones who should be gagged.
Now, formulate the strategy based on them and then build this questionnaire as Mr. Simhan said. The questions should be focused on the most likely 'suspects'. Offer closed questions and give them a drop down list to choose rather than giving spaces to let them flow. Never give an option like 'Too bad' to choose from. Maybe put 'Needs more attention' or the like. I say this because with what I can see, it is just a matter of time before they will repeat this and I believe your Manager is not quite experienced with 'IT minds' (forgive me, nothing personal). Unfortunately, some are base introverts and they react like a black mamba when threatened. They become so because of the way they are forced to think when working in I.T. Trust me I know. Hours and hours of the thinking and looming ideas day in and day out rather than living life in action as it should be. Becomes a habit. Cannot blame. Understand them and work around it.
In a nutshell: Stand back, acknowledge, learn grounds, spot the key, devise strategy, talk alliance OR/AND Keep an extra eye on the key person, find a reason to hit, remember to cut off all alibi, present your case to the Manager. Even if you cannot manage to push him out, you will have better grounds for fear is the reason they did this to you. Capitalize on their fear and remember to play it safe.
"Obstacles are like wild animals. They are cowards but they will bluff you if they can. If they see you are afraid of them... they are liable to spring upon you; but if you look them squarely in the eye, they will slink out of sight." - Orison Swett Marden
RJ
CEO & MD, Microbion
(Ex-Lawyer)
From India, Chennai
I favor Das Sajal. Also the other have put in great pieces of advice. I believe you need some step by step action plan and so this comment.
Now I would suggest you to look into the psychology of a 'closed group' inside your small company before you let them attack you with written feed backs. These are reports and you cannot keep for yourself. Next issue comes up and this might be on your Manager's desk, a solid proof to confirm action for they did this once and they will do this again. In your case what you should perceive from what Mr. Ramanan rightfully quoted above; 'nobody kicks a dead dog', is that someone kicks because they want it dead and out cold.
I suggest that the best strategy right now would be stepping back and acknowledging to your Manager that you have realized what went wrong. Remember to put a big smile on your face and not that of a grounded person when you say this to him. Thank your peers with a smile for they have brought it to your attention in a written statement and close the case now. Buy time.
Some questions you need to look into would be... Was your predecessor a much senior female? Or are you little too younger than the problematic group? Is your language far too good with structured vocabulary? If any of these are true, that could be a reason to corner you.
I suggest you make a list of the people who have conned you. Call up and talk once again to your predecessor. Get personal feed backs in their individual cases and 'write' them down. Make a character profile and try to figure out a way specifically for each person before you go ahead. Make a check list of what changes you have brought in the last 2 months. (include everything involving tea breaks or smoking or anything). If you have done this you might understand who you have offended and where this wave comes from. Now go to each of them, smile and spot the ones who avoids eye contacts with you. Rearrange the list and group the ones who should be gagged.
Now, formulate the strategy based on them and then build this questionnaire as Mr. Simhan said. The questions should be focused on the most likely 'suspects'. Offer closed questions and give them a drop down list to choose rather than giving spaces to let them flow. Never give an option like 'Too bad' to choose from. Maybe put 'Needs more attention' or the like. I say this because with what I can see, it is just a matter of time before they will repeat this and I believe your Manager is not quite experienced with 'IT minds' (forgive me, nothing personal). Unfortunately, some are base introverts and they react like a black mamba when threatened. They become so because of the way they are forced to think when working in I.T. Trust me I know. Hours and hours of the thinking and looming ideas day in and day out rather than living life in action as it should be. Becomes a habit. Cannot blame. Understand them and work around it.
In a nutshell: Stand back, acknowledge, learn grounds, spot the key, devise strategy, talk alliance OR/AND Keep an extra eye on the key person, find a reason to hit, remember to cut off all alibi, present your case to the Manager. Even if you cannot manage to push him out, you will have better grounds for fear is the reason they did this to you. Capitalize on their fear and remember to play it safe.
"Obstacles are like wild animals. They are cowards but they will bluff you if they can. If they see you are afraid of them... they are liable to spring upon you; but if you look them squarely in the eye, they will slink out of sight." - Orison Swett Marden
RJ
CEO & MD, Microbion
(Ex-Lawyer)
From India, Chennai
Dear Deepti
Your colleagues are old to that organization and are well inclusive to that environment & culture. It takes some time to make a space & comfortable zone among your new peers. Remember, any change will be resisted in every sector. Its only acceptable after a short time span. Just try to mingle with them and possess positive attitude. This is the imperative quality desired from an HR by an organization.
From India, Mumbai
Your colleagues are old to that organization and are well inclusive to that environment & culture. It takes some time to make a space & comfortable zone among your new peers. Remember, any change will be resisted in every sector. Its only acceptable after a short time span. Just try to mingle with them and possess positive attitude. This is the imperative quality desired from an HR by an organization.
From India, Mumbai
Hi Deepti forget about others look into ur improvements, understand where ur lacking. I agree communciation is very important, co workers should understand u and support ur skills and where ur lacking. I suggest u start speaking with your co workers boldly that will lead to gud results
All the best.
From India, Bangalore
All the best.
From India, Bangalore
Following may help you
Free YouTube video on English speaking enhancement and for fluency. My Saturday blog post for all my friends.
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Human Resources, Business, Management and career questions blog.: Videos for improving your english communication skills, fluency and confidence
From India, Mumbai
Free YouTube video on English speaking enhancement and for fluency. My Saturday blog post for all my friends.
Please click on following link. Share if you like to help your network and friends
Human Resources, Business, Management and career questions blog.: Videos for improving your english communication skills, fluency and confidence
From India, Mumbai
Hello Deepti
There are useful suggestions from Mr.Sinmhan and Dassajal and really great contributions from Lavika, Rupa Mehtha, Krishnan and Binae Raj.I have only little to contribute more so from the point of view of perceptions.
1)Realise that a workplace is a congregation of different psyches.Do not expect it to be a place where like minded people only come together. We need to balance these psyches sometimes by changing our responses to external reactions (stimuli) and some times by bringing a change in the external responses itself.
2) Understand that there will be bouquets and brickbats in the professional like HR. It is difficult to satisfy every employee.Every HR will go through the same pain and confusion in the formatting years of his/her career as you are currently going through. So realise that it happens mostly in every HR's career.
3) Recognise that adversity is a great teacher.It is only in adversity,you develop skills for survival.A Country like Japan rose like phoenix from the ashes of Second World War to become a massive industrial power.
4) understanding the above facts will calm your nerves and make you understand that there is no need to be unusually disturbed and make you more solution centric rather than problem centric.
5) If the feed back given the employees is honest,then the inputs given by DasSajal,Lavika, Rupa ,Krishnan and Binae raj will be of great help.
6) If there i s a pressure group or a coterie and the feedback given is tainted with malice and in bad faith or if their conduct borders on workplace bullying, it needs to be handled deftly.Some suggestions that may be of help are :
a) try to change their perception about you by taking the first initiative by reaching out to them , responding positively to them and trying to address their grievances without waiting for them to come to you and at the same time keeping a record of your efforts in this direction to place before the management when needed;
b) It is not possible to say 'yes' always to win friends but be assertive but learn to say 'NO' without sounding being blunt. Change the way to say it and change the language in which you can express it.
b)if they still persist in their non-cooperative and offensive mode and still give negative feed back despite your positive efforts, you need to neutralize this negative feed back by increasing the positive feed back from more number of employees and if necessary by undertaking some employee engagement activities This will break the barriers of communication with the reticent group while enchaining your communication level with other group of employees and consequently may pave the way for more positive feed back from more number of employees. You can also have a record of your efforts to show the management that the negative feed back has no merit in it.
c) After some time, you will find the coterie to fall in line.
Hope this helps
B.Saikumar
From India, Mumbai
There are useful suggestions from Mr.Sinmhan and Dassajal and really great contributions from Lavika, Rupa Mehtha, Krishnan and Binae Raj.I have only little to contribute more so from the point of view of perceptions.
1)Realise that a workplace is a congregation of different psyches.Do not expect it to be a place where like minded people only come together. We need to balance these psyches sometimes by changing our responses to external reactions (stimuli) and some times by bringing a change in the external responses itself.
2) Understand that there will be bouquets and brickbats in the professional like HR. It is difficult to satisfy every employee.Every HR will go through the same pain and confusion in the formatting years of his/her career as you are currently going through. So realise that it happens mostly in every HR's career.
3) Recognise that adversity is a great teacher.It is only in adversity,you develop skills for survival.A Country like Japan rose like phoenix from the ashes of Second World War to become a massive industrial power.
4) understanding the above facts will calm your nerves and make you understand that there is no need to be unusually disturbed and make you more solution centric rather than problem centric.
5) If the feed back given the employees is honest,then the inputs given by DasSajal,Lavika, Rupa ,Krishnan and Binae raj will be of great help.
6) If there i s a pressure group or a coterie and the feedback given is tainted with malice and in bad faith or if their conduct borders on workplace bullying, it needs to be handled deftly.Some suggestions that may be of help are :
a) try to change their perception about you by taking the first initiative by reaching out to them , responding positively to them and trying to address their grievances without waiting for them to come to you and at the same time keeping a record of your efforts in this direction to place before the management when needed;
b) It is not possible to say 'yes' always to win friends but be assertive but learn to say 'NO' without sounding being blunt. Change the way to say it and change the language in which you can express it.
b)if they still persist in their non-cooperative and offensive mode and still give negative feed back despite your positive efforts, you need to neutralize this negative feed back by increasing the positive feed back from more number of employees and if necessary by undertaking some employee engagement activities This will break the barriers of communication with the reticent group while enchaining your communication level with other group of employees and consequently may pave the way for more positive feed back from more number of employees. You can also have a record of your efforts to show the management that the negative feed back has no merit in it.
c) After some time, you will find the coterie to fall in line.
Hope this helps
B.Saikumar
From India, Mumbai
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