Thank you for all your views.I know that i am fighting a hard battle.Thinking of moving ahead with a different job as i dont see a point in sticking on since the bad blood is now there.Was wondering if companies support such unprofessioanl practices,what employees can resort to in such cases?
From India, Bangalore
1From India, Bangalore
Dear Mr.Anonymous,
It was indeed a harrowing experience you had been through. Upon reading through your detailed mail it appears to me that there is some prejudice you have against your boss and vice versa. This prejudice has split the relationship. You need to excuse me for finding pinholes in the statements made by you.
When you expect your boss to call you to enquire about your health which she did not, on the same token you also did not call her personally to covey about your accident. You have passed on the message through your sister. I do agree that you cannot communicate while you were hospitalised, but you could have always called up and informed her personally after you were out of the hospital. Text messaging does not establish personal rapport it is just one mode of communication that lacks the emotional angle.
Working for 12 - 14 hours a day is not uncommon when one has projects to be completed. The work from home concept also permits you to work for long hours which is actually not revealed to the external world.
The other aspect that I observe is you have actually stated that you have worked out a plan and expected the boss to carryout the plan in your absence. I am not sure how critically you were injured. If you were OK to atleast speak to your team members then you could have communicated to them over mobile or some means.
The workplace you are in may not be congenial for you to work if you are convinced that you cannot strike a cordial relationship with your reporting boss.
My only request is even before we start pointing fingers at others we need to dwell upon our own deeds that led to such a situation.
Regards
M.V.Kannan
From India, Madras
It was indeed a harrowing experience you had been through. Upon reading through your detailed mail it appears to me that there is some prejudice you have against your boss and vice versa. This prejudice has split the relationship. You need to excuse me for finding pinholes in the statements made by you.
When you expect your boss to call you to enquire about your health which she did not, on the same token you also did not call her personally to covey about your accident. You have passed on the message through your sister. I do agree that you cannot communicate while you were hospitalised, but you could have always called up and informed her personally after you were out of the hospital. Text messaging does not establish personal rapport it is just one mode of communication that lacks the emotional angle.
Working for 12 - 14 hours a day is not uncommon when one has projects to be completed. The work from home concept also permits you to work for long hours which is actually not revealed to the external world.
The other aspect that I observe is you have actually stated that you have worked out a plan and expected the boss to carryout the plan in your absence. I am not sure how critically you were injured. If you were OK to atleast speak to your team members then you could have communicated to them over mobile or some means.
The workplace you are in may not be congenial for you to work if you are convinced that you cannot strike a cordial relationship with your reporting boss.
My only request is even before we start pointing fingers at others we need to dwell upon our own deeds that led to such a situation.
Regards
M.V.Kannan
From India, Madras
Dear Kannan,
Thanks for your comments.From the time i have started working with her, there have been many instances where she used to behave very rude and sarcatic.I never used to bother myself much because that was her nature.May be as you told this could be an outcome of all the unspoken things between us.
Just wanted to correct myself on some points.
In fact once i was back from hospital,i had immediately send her a mail stating my health status as she did not pick up my call.Paralalley i was in touch with my members over phone guidng them.Its then she called up and told i need to quit and she will manage all the projects by herself.I was taken a back with her sudden change in behavior.When ever i tried to help in the way possible with the restrictions of my health ,she just started showering all sarcastic sms and emails.I did not have a choice,but to keep shut.
Also the plan which i had worked out was being followed by my team members.I did not expect her to take the trouble of execution.They had to approach her only in case of doubts as i was not in a position to sit and review as i was on bed rest.
Also as per our company policy,if an employee is met with an accident,she is suppossed to inform our commerical team,which she did not and also told them that i was not reporting to office.
I have been handling bigger teams and have been part of bigger projects.As you told there is no time limit to the job precisely because you end up working 12-14 hrs in office and then another 2-3 hours at home.But when i met with an accident and was not in a position to even sit.i was perplexed the way company was behaving.
From India, Bangalore
Thanks for your comments.From the time i have started working with her, there have been many instances where she used to behave very rude and sarcatic.I never used to bother myself much because that was her nature.May be as you told this could be an outcome of all the unspoken things between us.
Just wanted to correct myself on some points.
In fact once i was back from hospital,i had immediately send her a mail stating my health status as she did not pick up my call.Paralalley i was in touch with my members over phone guidng them.Its then she called up and told i need to quit and she will manage all the projects by herself.I was taken a back with her sudden change in behavior.When ever i tried to help in the way possible with the restrictions of my health ,she just started showering all sarcastic sms and emails.I did not have a choice,but to keep shut.
Also the plan which i had worked out was being followed by my team members.I did not expect her to take the trouble of execution.They had to approach her only in case of doubts as i was not in a position to sit and review as i was on bed rest.
Also as per our company policy,if an employee is met with an accident,she is suppossed to inform our commerical team,which she did not and also told them that i was not reporting to office.
I have been handling bigger teams and have been part of bigger projects.As you told there is no time limit to the job precisely because you end up working 12-14 hrs in office and then another 2-3 hours at home.But when i met with an accident and was not in a position to even sit.i was perplexed the way company was behaving.
From India, Bangalore
Dear Suchizmail,
Thank you for responding with your explanation. Forget the past and keep moving along. There also professional Managers who will lend a helping hand in a crisis situation. Unfortunately your current boss seems to lack the humane approach. As you have rightly pointed out do not dwell there and feel depressed move out as quickly as possible. May be the almighty has something better in store for you
Regards
M.V.Kannan
From India, Madras
Thank you for responding with your explanation. Forget the past and keep moving along. There also professional Managers who will lend a helping hand in a crisis situation. Unfortunately your current boss seems to lack the humane approach. As you have rightly pointed out do not dwell there and feel depressed move out as quickly as possible. May be the almighty has something better in store for you
Regards
M.V.Kannan
From India, Madras
Hello Suchizmail,
All one can say in the present situation & context is: ALL THE BEST.
By coincidence, I posted this Quote in another thread--which seems to be very apt for your situation too:
This is a Quote by Alexander Graham Bell [the Inventor of the Telephone] that I think I have mentioned earlier in CiteHR w.r.t. some other threads: "When one door closes, He opens other DOORS--but we so often keep staring at the closed door that we fail to notice the ones that He opened for us"--the key word being 'doors'--IN PLURAL.
Hope you get the point.
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
All one can say in the present situation & context is: ALL THE BEST.
By coincidence, I posted this Quote in another thread--which seems to be very apt for your situation too:
This is a Quote by Alexander Graham Bell [the Inventor of the Telephone] that I think I have mentioned earlier in CiteHR w.r.t. some other threads: "When one door closes, He opens other DOORS--but we so often keep staring at the closed door that we fail to notice the ones that He opened for us"--the key word being 'doors'--IN PLURAL.
Hope you get the point.
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
Dear all,
Thank you so much for all the valuable suggestions and feedback.With the encouragement from all of you and support from my family,i decided to aproach my CEO on this matter.
After further dicussions ,it was very clear that the HR head and My super boss was of no use in this matter and was only favouring my Boss stating that they knew her since 3 yrs and no body had raised any such complaints against her till now.On the point of my salary being stopped because of the rumours spread by my boss,the HR head simply wrote an inconveneince note and tried to close it. when i asked for a transfer to some other unit,they just told me that currently there are no vacancies in the company that would 'meet my expectations'.So my only option was to quit and go.I knew that i was not at fault and mustered all my courage and wrote to the CEO of my company.To my surprise.he actually responded to me and enquired on what had happened.He directly conducted investigation from his end on this matter and got to know about the facts.So then my Boss and team played a different game to tarnish my reputation in front of him by saying that my performance was weak.But,he being a rational person, and taking into consideration the circumstantial evidence,he directly offered me an opportunity to work in a different department.Now every body in the organization knows that my Boss has done wrong,but since she is handling some very important accounts,they will not take any action against her.
I would be joining the new team tomorrow and now nobody has a say,as the CEO has directly taken this up.Now i have got a chance to prove myself again to all of them who pointed fingers against me.Because of all this,I also got an opportunity to interact with another very senior person in my company and it was his advise to me not to quit if i was right that encouraged me to stand up against all odds.I was fighting a lone battle and was going through such mental trauma,but his guidance really helped me to do the right thing.Today when i got the call from the CEO's office congratulating me on the team movement and on having the guts to bring it to his notice,i just thanked god for being with me.
This incident actually taught me few lessons too,ie
Approach any situation rationally and not emotionally
If wrong is being done to you,have an open discussion with your boss and let him//her know your feelings if possible(In my case i was silently taking all the nonsense as i did not have the courage to openly talk and at the end had to suffer like this)
Very important to discuss such things with some one senior in the organization,as they would be able to guide you through this or atleast would be able to tell you how your organization would deal with such instances.
Finally,believe in yourself and make a real effort then,Truth will finally win
From India, Bangalore
Thank you so much for all the valuable suggestions and feedback.With the encouragement from all of you and support from my family,i decided to aproach my CEO on this matter.
After further dicussions ,it was very clear that the HR head and My super boss was of no use in this matter and was only favouring my Boss stating that they knew her since 3 yrs and no body had raised any such complaints against her till now.On the point of my salary being stopped because of the rumours spread by my boss,the HR head simply wrote an inconveneince note and tried to close it. when i asked for a transfer to some other unit,they just told me that currently there are no vacancies in the company that would 'meet my expectations'.So my only option was to quit and go.I knew that i was not at fault and mustered all my courage and wrote to the CEO of my company.To my surprise.he actually responded to me and enquired on what had happened.He directly conducted investigation from his end on this matter and got to know about the facts.So then my Boss and team played a different game to tarnish my reputation in front of him by saying that my performance was weak.But,he being a rational person, and taking into consideration the circumstantial evidence,he directly offered me an opportunity to work in a different department.Now every body in the organization knows that my Boss has done wrong,but since she is handling some very important accounts,they will not take any action against her.
I would be joining the new team tomorrow and now nobody has a say,as the CEO has directly taken this up.Now i have got a chance to prove myself again to all of them who pointed fingers against me.Because of all this,I also got an opportunity to interact with another very senior person in my company and it was his advise to me not to quit if i was right that encouraged me to stand up against all odds.I was fighting a lone battle and was going through such mental trauma,but his guidance really helped me to do the right thing.Today when i got the call from the CEO's office congratulating me on the team movement and on having the guts to bring it to his notice,i just thanked god for being with me.
This incident actually taught me few lessons too,ie
Approach any situation rationally and not emotionally
If wrong is being done to you,have an open discussion with your boss and let him//her know your feelings if possible(In my case i was silently taking all the nonsense as i did not have the courage to openly talk and at the end had to suffer like this)
Very important to discuss such things with some one senior in the organization,as they would be able to guide you through this or atleast would be able to tell you how your organization would deal with such instances.
Finally,believe in yourself and make a real effort then,Truth will finally win
From India, Bangalore
Hello Suchizmail,
At the outset, a BIG Congrats for making the change in the positive direction. All the BEST.
However, some of your comments/remarks/conclusions do look lopsided.
"I was fighting a lone battle.....' is quite far from truth--since you had HIM on your side, with your family, CEO & CiteHR playing their own small roles in the whole experience of yours. And He was on your side, since you adhered to BOTH Truth & Dharma. And Alexander Graham Bell's Quote does play-out when one least expects it.
"Approach any situation rationally and not emotionally"--your presumption/conclusion seems to be veering towards another extreme from one.
There will ALWAYS be situations that need to be handled 'thru the head' [in your words 'rationally'] & some situations that need to be handled thru the heart [[in your words 'emotionally']. The problem comes when one tries to handle 'thru the heart' what needs to be handled 'thru the head', and vice-versa & sometimes mixing-up both the approaches [primarily emanating from confusion/misplacing of priorities]. For example, your Boss/HR Head/Super boss would fall into the III category of mixing-up. That's basic human nature--the tendency to move from one extreme of the pendulum-swing to the other.
Hope you get the point.
"Believe in yourself and make a real effort then,Truth will finally win"--absolutely RIGHT--like the Saying goes: God helps those who help themselves.
There are a few other aspects in this experience of yours that I notice--but that would become heavy stuff I guess.
For the present I am sure you wish to focus on your new assignment--ALL THE BEST again.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
At the outset, a BIG Congrats for making the change in the positive direction. All the BEST.
However, some of your comments/remarks/conclusions do look lopsided.
"I was fighting a lone battle.....' is quite far from truth--since you had HIM on your side, with your family, CEO & CiteHR playing their own small roles in the whole experience of yours. And He was on your side, since you adhered to BOTH Truth & Dharma. And Alexander Graham Bell's Quote does play-out when one least expects it.
"Approach any situation rationally and not emotionally"--your presumption/conclusion seems to be veering towards another extreme from one.
There will ALWAYS be situations that need to be handled 'thru the head' [in your words 'rationally'] & some situations that need to be handled thru the heart [[in your words 'emotionally']. The problem comes when one tries to handle 'thru the heart' what needs to be handled 'thru the head', and vice-versa & sometimes mixing-up both the approaches [primarily emanating from confusion/misplacing of priorities]. For example, your Boss/HR Head/Super boss would fall into the III category of mixing-up. That's basic human nature--the tendency to move from one extreme of the pendulum-swing to the other.
Hope you get the point.
"Believe in yourself and make a real effort then,Truth will finally win"--absolutely RIGHT--like the Saying goes: God helps those who help themselves.
There are a few other aspects in this experience of yours that I notice--but that would become heavy stuff I guess.
For the present I am sure you wish to focus on your new assignment--ALL THE BEST again.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
Absolutely TS.now i realize that I really have HIM with me .Other wise such a turn of events is quite unexpected .It is a surprise to everyone in my organization.
I never wanted to leave this organization as it was my dream job.But did not really know how to handle such a situation.I really appreciate the genuine comments and responses from all you seniors as it really gave me some food for thought.
I am thankful to every one who has given me the courage and strength to hold on till the end.
From India, Bangalore
I never wanted to leave this organization as it was my dream job.But did not really know how to handle such a situation.I really appreciate the genuine comments and responses from all you seniors as it really gave me some food for thought.
I am thankful to every one who has given me the courage and strength to hold on till the end.
From India, Bangalore
Dear Anonymous
Hearty congratulations for standing for the value of candor(conviction of being frank) and and courage and won the battle agaisnt manipulation and bias under the able guidance of a well meaning senior and with the help of an understanding impartial CEO. I remember Paulo Coelho the author of his widely read book "Alchemist" saying somewhere in the book that when you have the right 'spirit' and the 'will', the entire universe conspires to help you in winning the battles.Probably and as tajsateesh said, that is the reason, you got a guiding senior, an understanding CEO, your family and members of citehr, howsoever small may be their contribution, on your side in your struggle to vindicate the truth..
Wishing a great career ahead.
B.Saikumar
HR & Labour law Advisor
Mumbai
From India, Mumbai
Hearty congratulations for standing for the value of candor(conviction of being frank) and and courage and won the battle agaisnt manipulation and bias under the able guidance of a well meaning senior and with the help of an understanding impartial CEO. I remember Paulo Coelho the author of his widely read book "Alchemist" saying somewhere in the book that when you have the right 'spirit' and the 'will', the entire universe conspires to help you in winning the battles.Probably and as tajsateesh said, that is the reason, you got a guiding senior, an understanding CEO, your family and members of citehr, howsoever small may be their contribution, on your side in your struggle to vindicate the truth..
Wishing a great career ahead.
B.Saikumar
HR & Labour law Advisor
Mumbai
From India, Mumbai
Hi Suchimail :
It is great to hear your problem is resolved. I am sure it will be a inspiration for those who may be dealing with similar problems.
Members often post their problems/issue but rarely a few of them like you post the conclusive results. ALL THE BEST for your new assignment.
TS : Thanks for sharing your insights. It helps to get a wider perspective.
- Gia
From India, Pune
It is great to hear your problem is resolved. I am sure it will be a inspiration for those who may be dealing with similar problems.
Members often post their problems/issue but rarely a few of them like you post the conclusive results. ALL THE BEST for your new assignment.
TS : Thanks for sharing your insights. It helps to get a wider perspective.
- Gia
From India, Pune
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