Hi Simhan Sir.,
The part of going pubs and clubs is not spread among all sir......... When people have values of their own,they wont go sir. Sir applying the theory to all girls is biased i think so sir. there are also girls who respect our culture and tradition sir.... There are also women who treat daughter-in-laws as their own daughters sir..... i think taking an set of people who do irresponsible things and accusing whole south Indian people is not good sir............
ANd If my reply hurt you by any means Am sorry sir..........

From India, Coimbatore
Dear Dhaarani,
For a start I am not generalising. Do not get hurt. I have nephews and neices who are house bound. I also know people who treat their daughters-in-law like their own daughter. There are exceptions. When compared to what girls wore in the 50's and 60's more girls wear North Indian dresses in the South. I am sure it is not forced on them by the parents, but the fashion has changed. Similarly, more girls and boys go to pubs and clubs and have boy/girl friends than used to be 40/50 years ago; it's all part of chnages in society and not forced by parents
I am not hurt at all from your comments. I live in the UK and we have never forced anything on our children.

From United Kingdom
HI Sir
I accept you are right about having boy friends and girl friends sir....... but then generation changes know sir....... It depends on persons and may vary sir... I have seen many persons going to pubs and all sir.... They have deteriorated them selves in the name of fashion, educated, professionals and all sir......
Even i cant accept the fact that only a person who goes to pubs and wearing non-suitable dresses are modern or cultured. It depends on thoughts and deeds of persons.but people fail to realize what we taught from ages sir......

From India, Coimbatore
Dear Mr Nashbramhall,
Sorry, but I would appreciate if you could keep religion and region out of the discussion. Because all this is happening in all the society and country, weather it is Christian,Muslim or Hindu speaking country. And do remember it is the basic duty of all the parents to see that his or her kid is not a burden to any society. No parents force their kids to do bad thing, but there are some who don't stop them from doing so. It is the parents who is responsible for their upbringing.
Also remember society consists of all of us who stay in it. So even if we become daughter, mother or mother in law the quality that we have inculcated will always remain with us and if we have not been guided then this bad things will happens. Something wrong is definately happening which is by and large affecting our Indian society. We have to give in our best to stop such evil things instead of blaming other's, making fun of religion and region.
Regards
Anita

From India, Mumbai
Dear Anita,
Thanks for the message. You have got the wrong end of the stick as the saying goes. By giving a link to the rape statistics, I have rather implied that it is neither exclusive to any religion or region. I have only responded to Dhaarani's beliefs. As I hail from the South and have seen changes since I left India to the UK in the 60s, I have used that as an example. I have never mentioned anything about any religion. In fact, I have said that no religion condones hurting others, etc.
I would much appreciate it if you could send me a private message giving examples of where I have made any comments about a specific religion or region. This will avoid going at tangent in the public forum.

From United Kingdom
As a person who initiated discussions on this important topic, I want my friends here not become emotional while conveying their points. I do not find anything wrong in Shri Simhan's comments.

In this regard I humbly suggest my friends here to please long on to my site R.Ganesh | NLP Trainer | Counsellor | Hypnotherapist | Reiki Healer | Life Improvement Mind Engineering and read my articles pertaining to the same subject. I have come out with plausible reasons as to how children get sex experience. As a Counselor and Clinical Hypnotherapist, I am very much worried about the conduct of our children who tilt towards Western culture. This morning I had a call from a Sub Inspector of Police (who was trained by me when he was grade I constable) referring a case of a minor girl who ran away with a minor boy. After frantically searching for 17 days the police found them in Ernakulam - Kerala. I am going to talk to that girl coming Friday. Only last month I counseled a girl who ran away with her woman teacher to Pondicherry where she stayed with her for 10 days. The same police Sub Inspector referred that girl to me. Since it is concerning girls, I am, as a part of my professional ethics, not revealing the details. And.. Simhan Sir, both the girls belong to a Religion that denies right to women.

I am very thankful to all my friends who contribute very valuable comments to this discussion. I object to the opinion of some that this topic is not to be discussed here in citeHR as there is a domain in this site for General Discussion and Daily Life. HR professionals do have family and children and when they don't have a peaceful family, then they will have a telling effect over their professional performance.

With warm and humble regards,

Ganesh Ramachandran

Founder - LIME

From India, Tiruppur
50% problem is with law enforcing,25% with toothless law, rest lies with prosecution/judicial process. VARGHESE MATHEW
From India, Thiruvananthapuram
all human beings are adopted to existing environments. majority of human mind is having involuntary fear of punishment against illega act. as on today nothing happens to criminals, deco its, terrorists, black money holders, rapists and factionists. self disciplined besides self esteem people are mere witnesses. when criminal lot is moving with white collar, obviously the rest will be tempted to follow the same path. if the punishment /legal action is set as an life long torturous example, none will dare to repeat the crime. hanging is not adequate, it gets erased, amputate the hands and leave him free in the society as an living example to others so as such crimes are not repeated. majority of criminals are having political/beaurocratic back ground. hence the cases are diluted. it is the biggest flaw. bribing huge amounts and cases are being perverted. the problem is simple, but government is inert.
From India, Bangalore
Would like to share something really good I read:

This is a letter from a mother to her son -

I share with you this letter to my son.

1. To be ‘loving’ is to be ‘loveable’ – it is possible to be both strong and tender at the same time.

Your masculine energy has been given to you to protect others and support them – don’t ever be a bully, but do defend yourself.

2. Play sport, be fit, eat well and live a wholesome life – you don’t yet know but you have only been given ‘one’ body – don’t abuse it, you don’t get to trade it in when you wear it out.

3. You set the tone in intimate relationships. Support and nurture the feminine energy around you. Like Yin and Yang, relationships need the strength of the masculine and the softness of the feminine.

4. Allow yourself to trust in all relationships – don’t fear being hurt or hold yourself back because of this fear. Fully express yourself; be the man you know yourself to be, and if it does not work out it's okay.... it is better to be yourself and be loved for that, than hide in a relationship and ignore your true self.

5. Don’t fear being alone. 'Like' yourself, know in your heart you are a good man – people are attracted to those who have self-belief.

6. See the light side of everything – don’t take yourself too seriously. Life is a long, hard road if you are not having fun along the way. Set goals and celebrate your successes.

7. Find what you have been put on the planet to do, how you can make a difference to others – Ask your self daily "how will I leave the planet a better place than when I arrived?"

8. Treat every woman kindly – and treat her equally. Women can do everything you can do – they just might do it differently.

9. Simply remember that life is a journey – every day counts and...be grateful for what you have

============

Esply Pt 8... Great share...

From India, Mumbai
Excellent advice. Education does truly begin at home and most our mental imprints happen when we are children.
From India, Bangalore
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