Hi Prachi Jain
This is kind of amusing to me. The Director should divorce himself from personal preferences from professional preferences. This Director is very dangerous in the sense, he is mixing personal feelings with professional ethics. I am sure in the future, it is the possibility he decisions will be biased towards his wife when it comes to promotions, bonus etc. This is pure colonial way of thinking rather than professional way of thinking. May be your company should have some code of ethics to manage either the "Birthday Celebrations" or "Marrying Sub-ordinates" or should identify these things as "Soliciting" in Employee code of conduct or ethics
This is a very serious situation. Remember, what happened with someone in IMF having a Girlfriend, and he promoted based on his personal preferences? the same goes with Bloomberg; he promoted his Girlfriend in the NY city corporation purely because she is his Girlfriend.
Stay Blessed
Hepzi Leon Soon

From Trinidad and Tobago, Mucurapo
Hi,
This shows how immature and undeserving the 'top' can be. Whose birthday was it any way? The employees birthday or the boss's wife's birthday? If one cannot differentiate between the two and have unrealistic expectations, God save the company from such people.
Cyril

From India, Nagpur
Dear Prachi,
I think you have done the right thing. Celebration of birthdays of employees is a company welfare activity & mass public is involved. Though she is directors wife, first she is employee of this company, she has be treated accordingly & as an employee they have to respect company's policy otherwise it will be personal favourism & mass public will be affected. Person sitting at director level should understand this at the very first place. This matter is directly related to the culture of the company. In my opinion, you should put things straight forward infront of the director & convey the message that it is a professional decision and should not be mingled with personal relations. I think directors are role models & carry forward the culture of the company. If he carries such kind of attitude then leave the decision upto him.
Regards,
Deepak

From India, Raipur
Hi Prachi,
I think the senior person at the Director level has found a better or more rewarding opportunity and is just making this as an excuse to leave the Company. So it is better that the top brass ask him to understand the realities of the Companies policies or take his call. If he is encouraged, do not be surprised if he asks the Company to provide his wife the same salary and benefits that he is entitled as a director. Company must be strong and such demands from a person at Director level must never be encouraged.
Thanks
Dayaram

From India, Bangalore
Hi,
Please ask him to compare the birthday celebrations while he was in entry level and what he is getting at present being in the senior level.
Its always better if you celebrate birthdays for all levels in equal manner to avaoid these kind of issues.
Regards,
Koshy

From India, Bangalore
Hi Prachi,

I understand the dilemma you are in but I believe that if you budge to the directors whim right now it will demoralize the junior team.

I am sure you have tried all the tricks in the book to convince him. Why don't you change the policy and make the celebrations similar in all level. It means either cutting down some thing from senior management side or upgrading the junior level celebration. Can your team convince the management for this change?

Please let us know finally what was the decision

Regards

From United Arab Emirates, Dubai
Hi Prachi,
Someone senior in the organization needs to tell him that he needs to understand to draw a line between personal and professional behaviour. In office the lady is another employee and not his wife. Did he in the last 7 years raise such an issue for any other entry level employee? He may be a good employee technically but he needs to also learn behavioural skills.
If he still does not get convinced he has an ulterior motive.
Best wishes,
Robbert

From India, Bangalore
Dear All,
I had one more point what if the wife has pushed the effiecient man in some situation like this (with all due respect) as you are saying she is at a juniro level chances are very high she is young and less experienced and must expressed her views to her husband .
You also ned to check what is her opinion on this situation ?
May be few things can be linked
comments !!
nirupama


Hi,
I don't think i am capable enough to give a proper solution to this problem but i think you should be talking to his wife about this. you had mentioned that this person is an efficient and effective resource in your company, I don't understand why he could be so silly and behave like a kid. Looks like, Soon after his wife's birthday celeberation, She would have started eating his head as to why her birthday was not given so much of importance. Ego between the two would have cropped-up. So talk to his wife and tell her that both of them are capable and the company wouldn't want to loose them just for this reason. She might understand and may be she would be of help. Please see that you tell very good things about her. To me, It looks like the wife of this Bachaa is prompting him to do /talk so. I am not too sure if this may work out, Anyways, Give it a try.
Thanks,
Hari

From India, Bangalore
It is quite strange case, where a director himself acting like begineer. As he is a director, he will be heading your dept/divsion. In such a case how you can convince or counsel him. What is his age? If he attained this position at a young age, then you can take the previalge to talk to him. Try once.
If he made up his mind to quit why you worry about him. As he is matured enough to take decision let him. His decision will not harm either your divsion nor your company. This kind of narrow minded persons shall destroy entire atmosphere.
I strongly feel, it is not a major issue. He himself mocking at him and degrading his wife. Let him do. You need not to worry till he starts taking revenge on subordinates.
As you concern for him, you can talk to his wife and explain the situation to enable her to convince/counsel/
SMS

From United Arab Emirates, Dubai
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