kashish chauhan
Hi ,
I have a query i hope you seniors will sort it out very easily i am working with a reputed school one of my colleague is in academic she slapped one child for her mistake and parents put this all on our Facebook page (school Facebook\'s page) and after taken apolozise letter from her school terminated her without any discuss now she is very confused what she can do in such case can anyone please help ?

From India, Gurgaon
karthik nayudu
80

Hi
It's mutual win win situation unless the exact facts are no one can sort the issue.
Beating children now a days is serious concern but in our childhood it is common, it's individual perception.
Chills
Karthik

From India, Vijayawada
kraviravi.kravi@gmail.com
113

i remember being very badly beaten by many of our school teachers, with cane on hand both sides + situps + slapping and what not but these things were necessary to maintain discipline and that is how we were moulded into what we are today. Todays kids are just YOLO SWAG people, who are a useless bunch. And their parents think their kids are best.
God save the world

From India, Madras
skhadir
288

I would like to know whether the incident was unfortunate or fortunate one. Instead of slapping, she could have done something else. We need to have extreme control on our action based behaviour else we will land in trouble.
There is nothing to worry about and she can proceed further with high confidence levels rather letting herself down.
With profound regards

From India, Chennai
Ankita1001
737

The answer actually depends on a case to case base:

The most important question is why was the need to slap a child, have all other warning situations used? Were the parents and/or head mister of the school informed (if it was a repeated action)

Had slapping solved the purpose there wasn't the need of any other punishment or system to get back a child on right lane.

The physical assault on children these days are hyped more so because of few incidents wherein teachers were found guilty of assaulting children for meager problems which could have solved by talking/scolding/giving remarks or calling parents. Few cases have been registered where such assault have etched not only physical but also emotional sting on child and have damaged him/her in many ways and also killing.

I agree with the fact that in our school days, we were punished so that we have discipline. Parents should realize that punishing is also necessary (of course in limits and well treated) in order to bring up a child and inculcate discipline and good notions.

Teachers should be aware of such cases and use other disciplinary actions as suggested above.

Hope it helped. :)

From India, Mumbai
CHR
660

Assault on children is a strict NO. Any physical punishment for children is in a way teaching children that physical violence is okay as a measure. Clearly you can see how this can manifest into them growing up to be adults who are physically abusive towards their own children, on roads or towards their partners.

Fortunately in today's world there is no space for physically abusive people and specially if the act is against a child. Even I received physical punishments while growing up, and I don't think it made me better in any way. If anything it made me trust my mentors less, which of course reduced my ability to learn and grow as an individual.

I have a child, and even when I'm completely drained of all patience, I never hit him. Scolding, removing rewards for a day and reminding him of the cause, not speaking to him - these usually jolts him back into line. But being a child he often forgets and repeat the same behaviour over and over. The key here is to be consistent - eventually they'll get the idea.

Regards,

Sid

From India, Gurgaon
Ankita1001
737

@Sid:

Sure, what you say is validated.

I too am one amongst who was never physically punished. Sure I had been sincere enough, but neither my parents nor my teachers have had a chance to punish.

But when we talk in general, there are situations when in order to bring discipline or in order to bring them on right path, you ought to be a little strict and give them this msg - "This will not be appreciated."

Hitting a child is no solution, is what I too believe in. But what would a parent/teacher do when something has really crossed limits -

to cite an Example: A small boy about 8years or younger was playing with other kids, (all guys) and out of some playful fights, he uttered all abuses and bad words, which was heard by his own mother. She just gave him one tight slap, asked other boys to leave him alone and didn't let him in. If an 8 year old kid of yours abuses some one, and that too as foul a language that is very stooped down, what would you as a parent do? Ofcourse explaining them is a solution, but remember some things requires a reaction on the instant else the explanation falls on deaf ears.... Some times you need to make the child feel sorry for their behaviour (i don't say by hitting or slapping but by some means) otherwise, they'd feel it's okay to beahve this way and no one would bother to correct them, at the max they would give one lecture of do's and dont's

(Completely my view point, don't intend to hurt you or question you. Ofcourse i believe in following your footsteps of using other means than slapping.... and though I'm still single, I don't like this approach as well, but i feel at times it becomes inevitable.)

From India, Mumbai
CHR
660

Please, I love open discussions like these. The case you described probably has some history behind it - the use of foul language comes from company or exposure to media which shows such behaviour as something "cool" or something that gets others afraid. Please remember every child is insecure and dependant - they will always look for ways that can secure their stand (in anything). When a child sees a parent behaving badly or on any media they tend to soak such behaviours - it becomes a part of them. So it's important to understand that the reason why the child used foul language was not because he "is" or "is becoming" a bad person - its the result of some unintended exposure.

When that child was hit - sure he got the point that using foul language is bad - but he probably also learnt that using foul language in front of parents is not a good idea - but it does get the other children afraid, so let's use it when no elder is around. Do you see the point? How the child is now a bit further away from his mentor.

Hitting will get you no where - what you need to stop and see is the causes of such behaviour and control the environment as much as possible. Try and block exposure to violent tv channels not intended for children. Avoid speaking harshly with your partner when the child is around - or explain to him that you are having an important discussion and that shouting was unintended and just happened because everyone got excited.

I'll give you one example - the children in my son's school hit each other - this is a common thing and is almost like a game. My son is not afraid of this and often tells me about how he is going to hit this person or that person. I keep asking him why he would want to hit, if getting hit doesn't feel good. The reason why he wants to hit is NOT because he likes hitting but because he feels insecure that someone will hit him first - so I am now trying to teach him how he can defend his sensitive body parts from assault. This is an ongoing process but it's important to make the child realize that hitting is not a nice thing.

This is a game you play with your mind - not with brawn. The child needs security and he can get the deepest security if he trusts his parents, his mentors.

Regards,

Sid

From India, Gurgaon
nashbramhall
1624

Dear all,
I have read the open discussions with interest. However, I feel that we have deviated from the query. The query is about what can the sacked teacher do now and not the rights and wrongs of hitting a child. I am sure the teacher who hit has felt sorry for hitting the child. However, the repentance is a bit too late.
CHR's advise to his son reminds of the advice given by Polonious to his son Leartes (In Shakespere's play Hamlet). "Beware of entrance to a quarrel; but, being in, bear't that the opposed may beware of thee."

From United Kingdom
CHR
660

Beautiful line Simhan, :)
As to the teacher's fate - it seems that only schools who don't care much about background and reference checks will be an employment option. But such things often come to the surface.
One safeguard could be to write an apology letter, explaining the situation and getting a copy signed from the parents (apology accepted) just for future reference. Otherwise a change in career is probably in order.
Regards,
Sid

From India, Gurgaon
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