Hey friends,
I need help. In my husband's organization, there are two employees who are now getting on my nerves with their daily activities. They are best friends of my husband. I am HR there, and they don't maintain decorum in the office and break one rule every day. If I say anything to them, my husband scolds me because of their deeds. I have received scoldings from my husband in the office many times due to them not working properly.
I don't know what to do! Please suggest what I can do to avoid this situation or just suggest something to help me navigate this issue.
With warm regards,
Richa
From India, Mumbai
I need help. In my husband's organization, there are two employees who are now getting on my nerves with their daily activities. They are best friends of my husband. I am HR there, and they don't maintain decorum in the office and break one rule every day. If I say anything to them, my husband scolds me because of their deeds. I have received scoldings from my husband in the office many times due to them not working properly.
I don't know what to do! Please suggest what I can do to avoid this situation or just suggest something to help me navigate this issue.
With warm regards,
Richa
From India, Mumbai
Richa, Your husband needs counselling as he interfere in discharging your duties effectively. pon
From India, Lucknow
From India, Lucknow
Dear Richa,
I am sure it doesn't feel good when your husband scolds you in the office for not delivering your job. Have you ever considered how it would feel when your boss holds you responsible for being incompetent and fires you for not being able to fulfill your responsibilities?
Please take a stand. I second Pon1965. Your husband needs direction.
Tell us more about your firm. Is it a startup? How is discipline valued by the company? What role does your husband have in your office? Does he have the authority to be responsible for these two friends whom he supports so much? In what roles are these two employees working? How much flexibility do they have in terms of work hours and behavior?
What about your manager? Discuss it with him and find a way out. Office discipline and decorum need to be respected. Nepotism can only lead to complications. Draw a line to maintain a healthy working environment but stay firm.
Wish you all the best!
Regards,
(Cite Contribution)
From India, Mumbai
I am sure it doesn't feel good when your husband scolds you in the office for not delivering your job. Have you ever considered how it would feel when your boss holds you responsible for being incompetent and fires you for not being able to fulfill your responsibilities?
Please take a stand. I second Pon1965. Your husband needs direction.
Tell us more about your firm. Is it a startup? How is discipline valued by the company? What role does your husband have in your office? Does he have the authority to be responsible for these two friends whom he supports so much? In what roles are these two employees working? How much flexibility do they have in terms of work hours and behavior?
What about your manager? Discuss it with him and find a way out. Office discipline and decorum need to be respected. Nepotism can only lead to complications. Draw a line to maintain a healthy working environment but stay firm.
Wish you all the best!
Regards,
(Cite Contribution)
From India, Mumbai
Hi Richa,
Agreeing with what Pon and (Cite Contribution) have mentioned, dealing with the issue directly might create problems in your personal life. It's better to seek help from an HR colleague to resolve this. Through this person, initiate counseling or proper coaching for your husband.
You haven't mentioned the designations and roles you both play in the organization, which could help in resolving the query raised here.
There are chances that the friends of your husband involved are instigating him in some way. I have seen this happening in one of the organizations I worked for, but timely interference of the HR head really saved the situation.
We look forward to your answers before we discuss this further.
Regards,
From India, Delhi
Agreeing with what Pon and (Cite Contribution) have mentioned, dealing with the issue directly might create problems in your personal life. It's better to seek help from an HR colleague to resolve this. Through this person, initiate counseling or proper coaching for your husband.
You haven't mentioned the designations and roles you both play in the organization, which could help in resolving the query raised here.
There are chances that the friends of your husband involved are instigating him in some way. I have seen this happening in one of the organizations I worked for, but timely interference of the HR head really saved the situation.
We look forward to your answers before we discuss this further.
Regards,
From India, Delhi
Dear Mrs. Richa,
I second PON and Ms. (Cite Contribution). This sounds like a FAMILY BUSINESS where your HUSBAND'S FRIENDS are also a part of it. Kindly remember that PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP, BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP, and FRIENDSHIP are three DIFFERENT CIRCLES that should never mix or become a SUBSET of each other.
I am sure you are smarter than your husband as you give preference to PROFESSIONAL DEALINGS at the workplace. My advice to you is to have a HIGH-LEVEL DISCUSSION with your HUSBAND. Ensure that BOTH OF YOU ARE DISCUSSING YOUR BUSINESS (SOURCE OF LIVING) WHILE VALUING YOUR PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP, which is more important than PROFESSIONAL RELATIONSHIP.
You can do it if you succeed in explaining things in the RIGHT WAY to your husband by using the RIGHT APPROACH.
Wishing you GOOD LUCK because your case is VERY SENSITIVE.
With profound regards
From India, Chennai
I second PON and Ms. (Cite Contribution). This sounds like a FAMILY BUSINESS where your HUSBAND'S FRIENDS are also a part of it. Kindly remember that PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP, BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP, and FRIENDSHIP are three DIFFERENT CIRCLES that should never mix or become a SUBSET of each other.
I am sure you are smarter than your husband as you give preference to PROFESSIONAL DEALINGS at the workplace. My advice to you is to have a HIGH-LEVEL DISCUSSION with your HUSBAND. Ensure that BOTH OF YOU ARE DISCUSSING YOUR BUSINESS (SOURCE OF LIVING) WHILE VALUING YOUR PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP, which is more important than PROFESSIONAL RELATIONSHIP.
You can do it if you succeed in explaining things in the RIGHT WAY to your husband by using the RIGHT APPROACH.
Wishing you GOOD LUCK because your case is VERY SENSITIVE.
With profound regards
From India, Chennai
Hello Richa,
(Cite Contribution) & Archna are right—unless you provide more information, any suggestions or solutions would be futile and, at worst, counterproductive. While I can identify a few actions you could take, it would be premature to mention them without a full understanding of your situation.
Best regards,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
(Cite Contribution) & Archna are right—unless you provide more information, any suggestions or solutions would be futile and, at worst, counterproductive. While I can identify a few actions you could take, it would be premature to mention them without a full understanding of your situation.
Best regards,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
Dear Richa,
Our friends with experience in HR have given some advice and raised some questions. Let me ask some specific questions to help you give a complete picture. I hope you have heard of Rudyard Kipling's six Wise Men or Honest Serving Men: What and Why and When, And How and Where and Who. What sort of organization is yours? How many people work there? Where, or in which department, do you, your husband, and his friends work? Are his friends male or female? How long have you both been working for the firm? What are their activities that really get on your nerves? What rules are they breaking? Who is your boss?
I am sure you are capable of forming your questions and answering them to give us a complete picture of what is happening. If we could only read your mind from afar, we could have helped you. But we can't; hence, help us by giving as much detail as you can to guide you.
Have a nice day.
Simhan A retired academic in the UK
From United Kingdom
Our friends with experience in HR have given some advice and raised some questions. Let me ask some specific questions to help you give a complete picture. I hope you have heard of Rudyard Kipling's six Wise Men or Honest Serving Men: What and Why and When, And How and Where and Who. What sort of organization is yours? How many people work there? Where, or in which department, do you, your husband, and his friends work? Are his friends male or female? How long have you both been working for the firm? What are their activities that really get on your nerves? What rules are they breaking? Who is your boss?
I am sure you are capable of forming your questions and answering them to give us a complete picture of what is happening. If we could only read your mind from afar, we could have helped you. But we can't; hence, help us by giving as much detail as you can to guide you.
Have a nice day.
Simhan A retired academic in the UK
From United Kingdom
Hey Richa,
You mentioned that you are in HR - what position exactly? Are you a Manager or Head of HR?
If you are an HR Manager/HR Head, you can solve this problem by implementing a policy against these kinds of activities in your organization. By including these two individuals in the policy, you can put a stop to this behavior. I believe you know how to create a policy, but trust me, this is the best way to address your issue.
I also would like to know the positions of your husband and the other two individuals you mentioned.
Most importantly, I suggest considering changing your job. It is generally not recommended for both spouses to work in the same organization, and I'm sure you understand why.
Once again, if you have the authority, create an organizational policy to address these issues.
From India, Gurgaon
You mentioned that you are in HR - what position exactly? Are you a Manager or Head of HR?
If you are an HR Manager/HR Head, you can solve this problem by implementing a policy against these kinds of activities in your organization. By including these two individuals in the policy, you can put a stop to this behavior. I believe you know how to create a policy, but trust me, this is the best way to address your issue.
I also would like to know the positions of your husband and the other two individuals you mentioned.
Most importantly, I suggest considering changing your job. It is generally not recommended for both spouses to work in the same organization, and I'm sure you understand why.
Once again, if you have the authority, create an organizational policy to address these issues.
From India, Gurgaon
Thank you all for your valuable suggestions. We started our business just 2 months ago, and everything is going well. Ours is an IT company with 25 employees, and I am the HR Head there while my husband is the MD. Interestingly, both our friends who work with us are also a husband-wife duo, where the husband is the Marketing Manager, and the wife is the Accounts Manager.
As mentioned by anilkr, yes, I can introduce new rules, but the key is that they must be followed. If they are not adhered to, then it is futile to implement them. I am looking forward to more of your valuable suggestions.
With warm regards,
Richa
From India, Mumbai
As mentioned by anilkr, yes, I can introduce new rules, but the key is that they must be followed. If they are not adhered to, then it is futile to implement them. I am looking forward to more of your valuable suggestions.
With warm regards,
Richa
From India, Mumbai
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