hi Prachi
between the devils and the deep blue sea eh?? well doesn't seem to be so. here if iam to understand the situation well., seems like he is aware of his significance in your company. After 7 years it seems like he thinks himself to be indispensable (may be the company has relaxed some rules for him before) and also feels above the company policies. either this is the situation or the likely situation is that he must be having something up his sleeve (or even worse could be the influence of his new found wife who may be trying to establish her supremacy over her colleagues), whatever be the situation in fact now i believe he is in a limbo. he may not be in a position to withdraw his remarks now (which would be seen as a defeat from his side in front of his staff and his wife). i would suggest that you talk to him clearly ensuring that the HR policies and objectives have to remain in place and propose a quick solution to the problem by advising him to tell his wife to prove her worth (of course she has by marrying him) but also at the work place which may make it acceptable for her team mates to appreciate her and themselves propose a gala birthday for her next year. something like throwing the ball back to his court.now that is another ego situation for him
From India, Thiruvananthapuram
between the devils and the deep blue sea eh?? well doesn't seem to be so. here if iam to understand the situation well., seems like he is aware of his significance in your company. After 7 years it seems like he thinks himself to be indispensable (may be the company has relaxed some rules for him before) and also feels above the company policies. either this is the situation or the likely situation is that he must be having something up his sleeve (or even worse could be the influence of his new found wife who may be trying to establish her supremacy over her colleagues), whatever be the situation in fact now i believe he is in a limbo. he may not be in a position to withdraw his remarks now (which would be seen as a defeat from his side in front of his staff and his wife). i would suggest that you talk to him clearly ensuring that the HR policies and objectives have to remain in place and propose a quick solution to the problem by advising him to tell his wife to prove her worth (of course she has by marrying him) but also at the work place which may make it acceptable for her team mates to appreciate her and themselves propose a gala birthday for her next year. something like throwing the ball back to his court.now that is another ego situation for him
From India, Thiruvananthapuram
Partiality in Employee Treatment.. What Director felt is Right. Pain is that he felt for his Girlfriend. Blessing in Disguise, Unfair to have partial treatment among Employees
From India, Coimbatore
From India, Coimbatore
Hi, All
It is been my experience that celebrations do very at different levels of an organization. We expect different levels of responsibility at the various levels of an organization, and we also expect different levels of maturity.
The Director's behavior is inconsistent with what you have decribed as "efficient". I wonder if he is "effective? One can be efficient but not effective.
If he is threatening to quit over such a mandane issue, then clearly something else is afoot.
I would anticipate that the Director of HR, would should be a peer and shares a similar level within the org structure should have a private discussion with him.
Regarding, his "irreplaceability", thats a myth. While it may be painful for an organization to have a senior employee leave, no one is that central to the organization that they should hold an organization "hostage" or create discord over such a minor protocol issue.
I would do my best to try to ferret out the real concerns, but in the end if he is threatening to leave...my attitude, after being thoughtful and reasoning with him, is ...dont let the door hit you..
Cheers.
From United Arab Emirates, Dubai
It is been my experience that celebrations do very at different levels of an organization. We expect different levels of responsibility at the various levels of an organization, and we also expect different levels of maturity.
The Director's behavior is inconsistent with what you have decribed as "efficient". I wonder if he is "effective? One can be efficient but not effective.
If he is threatening to quit over such a mandane issue, then clearly something else is afoot.
I would anticipate that the Director of HR, would should be a peer and shares a similar level within the org structure should have a private discussion with him.
Regarding, his "irreplaceability", thats a myth. While it may be painful for an organization to have a senior employee leave, no one is that central to the organization that they should hold an organization "hostage" or create discord over such a minor protocol issue.
I would do my best to try to ferret out the real concerns, but in the end if he is threatening to leave...my attitude, after being thoughtful and reasoning with him, is ...dont let the door hit you..
Cheers.
From United Arab Emirates, Dubai
Hi Navneet,
I completely agree with what you said "profesinal life should be separated with the personal life" but tell me 1 thing.. do you think its practically being done.. well i and also many of our HR friends will say NO.
In my case, when a senior and a critical member comes up and says that his wife should also get the same benefit or else he will resign.. what can we do?? If we say that we will go by the poilicies .. then the managment will fire us..
I am just saying the practicality of the problem.. As you rightly said, yes i have not solved the problem.. but atleast i have done the best which we could do in that situation. The culture change cannot be induced only by the HR dept.. even we require the support and the cooperation of the top management.
regards
Harsha.
From India
I completely agree with what you said "profesinal life should be separated with the personal life" but tell me 1 thing.. do you think its practically being done.. well i and also many of our HR friends will say NO.
In my case, when a senior and a critical member comes up and says that his wife should also get the same benefit or else he will resign.. what can we do?? If we say that we will go by the poilicies .. then the managment will fire us..
I am just saying the practicality of the problem.. As you rightly said, yes i have not solved the problem.. but atleast i have done the best which we could do in that situation. The culture change cannot be induced only by the HR dept.. even we require the support and the cooperation of the top management.
regards
Harsha.
From India
Hi Prachi,Please understand first that no one is indespensable for the organisation first.Go on a executive search secretly and get every formality done outside the organisation if the need arises do the hunting yourself .Once a rule is voilated there will be numerous instances.Before you have a replacement handle tactfully.once a tumor develops in vital organ its better to remove it than destroy the whole system...but make every move with doctors precision RegardsBishwajeet
From United States, Long Beach
From United States, Long Beach
Hi Prachi,
I am a HR practitioner from Malaysia & I have been following some of the forums posted in CiteHR.
What I see from your naration of the events - my opinion is that the HR Director has an attitude problem. He maybe a good performer but any one with attitude problem will definitely, or at least at one point of time, cause problems to the Company. Our responsibility as a HR personnel towards the Company that we work for is also to reduce the exposure that the Company is subjected to due to human problems such as this.
To eloborate further on the Attitude Problem - what I see is :-
1) EGO - whereby he wants his wife treated well because she is the Director's wife and not in the capacity of an entre level staff.
2) CORRUPT - whereby the thinking that he has that the Company owes his wife the 'director treatment' itself expresses corruption not in the form of money but perception/expectation.
I am an Malaysian Indian and have traveled to India frequently. India is a beautiful country and her richness has enchanted me - creating a wanting in me to return to her as often as possible.
As for her workforce - from a global point of view - needs more maturity and 'openess' by means of exposure to the outer world and Global HR practices. Your decisions from what I see in the forums posted, are emotional based not rational & practicality based.
I wish you good luck in your hunt for a new director - preferrably one with more maturity or at least matured thinking.
If my comment has hurt any readers - pls do accept my humble apology.
M'sia HR
From Malaysia, Shah Alam
I am a HR practitioner from Malaysia & I have been following some of the forums posted in CiteHR.
What I see from your naration of the events - my opinion is that the HR Director has an attitude problem. He maybe a good performer but any one with attitude problem will definitely, or at least at one point of time, cause problems to the Company. Our responsibility as a HR personnel towards the Company that we work for is also to reduce the exposure that the Company is subjected to due to human problems such as this.
To eloborate further on the Attitude Problem - what I see is :-
1) EGO - whereby he wants his wife treated well because she is the Director's wife and not in the capacity of an entre level staff.
2) CORRUPT - whereby the thinking that he has that the Company owes his wife the 'director treatment' itself expresses corruption not in the form of money but perception/expectation.
I am an Malaysian Indian and have traveled to India frequently. India is a beautiful country and her richness has enchanted me - creating a wanting in me to return to her as often as possible.
As for her workforce - from a global point of view - needs more maturity and 'openess' by means of exposure to the outer world and Global HR practices. Your decisions from what I see in the forums posted, are emotional based not rational & practicality based.
I wish you good luck in your hunt for a new director - preferrably one with more maturity or at least matured thinking.
If my comment has hurt any readers - pls do accept my humble apology.
M'sia HR
From Malaysia, Shah Alam
Apologise ur director for your mistake ( which is not actually a mistake ) and give his bride a nice gift...close the matter..stop celebrating birthdays if company treats directors and entry level staff in two different ways
From India, Mumbai
From India, Mumbai
I don't think thats not at all his problem? Problem is something else that he was not disclosing. This is a situation he is using it. How can u bear such people. You try to findout the actual problem. In my openion He want to go let him go as soon as possible.
Dear Prachi,
This one is really tricky. I suggest that your HR Head has to get involved in this. He has to explain the rationale behind it.
Preferably it would be nice if a female goes to him personally and discusses with him. I am pretty sure that his wife has developed an ego who has in turn instigated her husband.
You could also think of going to their house personally and do the explanation.
Believe me, HR works best at homes.
Regards
Sandeep Powar:p
This one is really tricky. I suggest that your HR Head has to get involved in this. He has to explain the rationale behind it.
Preferably it would be nice if a female goes to him personally and discusses with him. I am pretty sure that his wife has developed an ego who has in turn instigated her husband.
You could also think of going to their house personally and do the explanation.
Believe me, HR works best at homes.
Regards
Sandeep Powar:p
Dear Prachi,
First things first - the best thing would have been the day people at these two different levels got married, one should have moved out of this company. More so, if it is not a family owned company, where the Director will have the option of celebrating anybody's birthday's the way he likes.
The Director seems to be caugh in the web of his personal ego which the policies do not allow to be fulfilled.
He feels bad he is not able to please his wife despite being in that position. Perhaps a private party thrown by his friends outside the office would have addressed the issue to some extent.
But if staff feel that it is not so important to try and please this boss, well the Director could consider other options and the company should look out for a replacement.
Follow the policy of "no one is indespensible" and plan a replacement systematically. There are lot of people out there......
Siva
Counsellor and soft skills coach
From India, Delhi
First things first - the best thing would have been the day people at these two different levels got married, one should have moved out of this company. More so, if it is not a family owned company, where the Director will have the option of celebrating anybody's birthday's the way he likes.
The Director seems to be caugh in the web of his personal ego which the policies do not allow to be fulfilled.
He feels bad he is not able to please his wife despite being in that position. Perhaps a private party thrown by his friends outside the office would have addressed the issue to some extent.
But if staff feel that it is not so important to try and please this boss, well the Director could consider other options and the company should look out for a replacement.
Follow the policy of "no one is indespensible" and plan a replacement systematically. There are lot of people out there......
Siva
Counsellor and soft skills coach
From India, Delhi
Community Support and Knowledge-base on business, career and organisational prospects and issues - Register and Log In to CiteHR and post your query, download formats and be part of a fostered community of professionals.