First Impression is not the Last Impression - Changing your First Impression
First Impression is not the Last Impression - Changing
your First Impression
Introduction
Earlier, they use to say that “Your First Impression
is the last impression” and now, they say that “your
first impression is not the last impression but
long-lasting impression. Hence, there is a scope to
rectify your “first impression” and at times there is
also a need to do so. There are times when we think
that we have made a mistake…we should not have carried
ourselves the way we did and then we look forward to
one chance to correct our “first impression”.
In this article, we will be discussing about this and
other related issues such as things you should do or
should not do to make a “Perfect” first impression;
what will you do to change your first impression and
will you give one more chance to someone to rectify
his / her first impression.
Understanding the term – “First Impression” (FI)
Before talking about “First Impression” (FI), lets
discuss, what is “impression” to start with. Though,
your looks and appearance is a part of your impression
but that is not the only thing, which matters. Your
impression means your overall personality and it
consists of:
1) The Way you carry yourself
2) Your Dress-up
3) The way you express yourself
4) Your Mannerism
5) Your Behavior
6) Your Communication
7) The way you treat the other person
These all are the traits which consist of impression
and thereby are related to your FI.
For an impression to be called as FI, this must be
your first meeting with that person. FI can be of two
types – Planned and Unplanned. It is planned, when you
are aware of it. For example,
1) Your job - interview,
2) Business meeting with client,
3) Dating,
4) You are invited as a guest
FI can be planned, when you are not prepared for it.
For example, people looking at you when you are
walking down the street; when you are traveling; when
you are just passing through a place, you are at a
place where people around you hardly matters to you
etc.
This first impression process occurs in every new
situation. Within the first few seconds, people pass
judgment on you – looking for common surface clues.
Once the first impression is made, it is virtually
irreversible.
The process works like this:
A. If you appear to be of comparable business or
social level, you are considered suitable for further
interaction.
B. If you appear to be of higher business or social
status, you are admired and cultivated as a valuable
contact.
C. If you appear to be of lower business or social
standing, you are tolerated but kept at arm's length.
If you are in an interview situation, you can either
appear to match the corporate culture or not,
ultimately affecting the outcome.
For the purpose of this article, we will be
concentrating on Planned FI because people making an
impression about you, when you are walking down the
street, hardly matters to anyone.
Changing your FI
Now, let’s discuss about this. Suppose you are at the
receiving end, you met a person and he made certain
opinion about you, it can be about your behavior or
the way you carry yourself. Or he has read about you
or has heard about you and based on that there was
already some notion in his mind. You know that you are
not what the other person is thinking or assuming
about you. Will you make an attempt to correct that
impression or assumption?
I asked this question in some of my training programs.
I have asked this question to 748 people. I also
discussed this with some of my friends. Around 67% of
them said, “NO”. They will not make any attempt to
change FI. They said that it hardly matter to us. Let
anyone carry any impression that they want to carry.
26% said that once they know, what type of impression
the other person is carrying, they might make an
attempt to change that impression. 7% respondents
remain neutral.
In my views, I think we are taking things a bit too
lightly. It is true that, with so many people around
us, it hardly matters what people think about you but
if we take it in a positive manner, people will not
remember who you are; they will not remember how you
look like, but they will always remember how you made
them feel like; how you treated them; how you behaved
with them. I think it is very important to have a good
impression. That is how people will remember you.
Hence, though there is a very little possibility that
you get “another chance” to rectify your impression
but if you get, make a best use of it.
Giving a Chance to Someone to Improve the First
Impression
Let’s be fair on this. We all know that your first
impression might not be the impression that you want
to create. Just, only in this article we also proved
that. I asked one more question in my training
programs. I have asked this question to 748 people. I
also discussed this with some of my friends. We
discussed the scenarios that suppose you are the
person who is judging another person. You met a person
and made certain opinion about him or her. Your
assumptions about the person might not be correct. So,
will you give that person another chance to rectify
that “first-impression”? How easy or difficult will it
be for you to change your first impression about that
person? Around 34% respondents said that for them the
first impression is the final impression and they will
go by their gut feeling. 59% respondents said that
they will give as many chances as possible to that
person to rectify his / her FI. 7% respondents were
neutral.
As some people expressed above that though they will
be giving chances and opportunities to other people to
rectify their first-impression but at the same time
they also agreed that with this the other person will
only be able to change the opinion and the
first-impression will remain unchanged and locked in
the memory. Hence, it is very important to go that
extra mile and make a knock-out first impression.
Factors one should consider while making first
impression
Basic principles to make the BEST “First Impression”
A. A Winning Smile: “Smile and the world smiles too.”
So there’s nothing like a smile to create a good first
impression. A warm and confident smile will put both
you and the other person at ease. So smiling is a
winner when it comes to great first impressions. But
don't go overboard with this - people who take this
too far can seem insincere and smarmy, or can be seen
to be "lightweights".
B. A Word about Individuality: The good news is you
can usually create a good impression without total
conformity or losing your individuality. Yes, to make
a good first impression you do need to “fit in” to
some degree. But it all goes back to being appropriate
for the situation. If in a business setting, wear
appropriate business attire. If at a formal evening
social event, wear appropriate evening attire. And
express your individuality appropriately within that
context.
C. Be on Time: The person you are meeting for the
first time is not interested in your “good excuse” for
running late. Plan to arrive a few minutes early. And
allow flexibility for possible delays in traffic or
taking a wrong turn. Arriving early is much better
that arriving late, hands down, and is the first step
in creating a great first impression.
D. Be Yourself, Be at Ease: If you are feeling
uncomfortable and on edge, this can make the other
person ill at ease and that’s a sure way to create the
wrong impression. If you are calm and confident, so
the other person will feel more at ease, and so have a
solid foundation for making that first impression a
good one.
E. Be Open and Confident: When it comes to making the
first impression, body language as well as appearance
speaks much louder than words. Use your body language
to project appropriate confidence and self-assurance.
Stand tall, smile (of course), make eye contact, greet
with a firm handshake. All of this will help you
project confidence and encourage both you and the
other person feel better at ease.
Almost everyone gets a little nervous when meeting
someone for the first time, which can lead to nervous
habits or sweaty palms. By being aware of your nervous
habits, you can try to keep them in check. And
controlling a nervous jitter or a nervous laugh will
give you confidence and help the other person feel at
ease.
F. Be Positive: Your attitude shows through in
everything you do. Project a positive attitude, even
in the face of criticism or in the case of
nervousness. Strive to learn from your meeting and to
contribute appropriately, maintaining an upbeat manner
and a smile.
G. Be Courteous and Attentive: It goes without saying
that good manners and polite, attentive and courteous
behavior help make a good first impression. In fact,
anything less can ruin the one chance you have at
making that first impression. So be on your best
behavior. One modern manner worth mentioning is “turn
off your mobile phone”. What first impression will you
create if you are already speaking to someone other
than the person you are meeting for the first time?
Your new acquaintance deserves 100% of your attention.
Anything less and you’ll create a less than good first
impression.
H. Present Yourself Appropriately: Of course physical
appearance matters. The person you are meeting for the
first time does not know you and your appearance is
usually the first clue he or she has to go on. But it
certainly does not mean you need to look like a model
to create a strong and positive first impression. The
key to a good impression is to present yourself
appropriately.
Start with the way you dress. What is the appropriate
dress for the meeting or occasion? For business and
social meetings, appropriate dress also varies between
countries and cultures, so it’s something that you
should pay particular attention to when in an
unfamiliar setting or country. Make sure you know the
traditions and norms.
Appropriate dressing and grooming help make a good
first impression and also help you feel “the part”,
and so feel more calm and confident. Add all of this
up and you are well on your way to creating a good
first impression.
I. Small Talk Goes a Long Way…: Conversations are
based on verbal give and take. It may help you to
prepare questions you have for the person you are
meeting for the first time beforehand. Or, take a few
minutes to learn something about the person you meet
for the first time before you get together. For
instance, does he play golf? Does she work with a
local charitable foundation? Is there anything that
you know of that you have in common with the person
you are meeting? If so, this can be a great way to
open the conversation and to keep it flowing.
Conclusion
There is no doubt that your first impression is very
important and most of the times you get only one
chance to make that knocking impact. It is also true
that usually you do not get another chance to rectify
your first impression. However, if you are lucky
enough to get another chance, hold that with both
hands and make an everlasting impact. Here, there are
two types of people…people at your workplace, people
in your family and those with whom you meet
occasionally, once in a year or so…one should take
care of that.
At the end, I only like to say, that it is very
important to know the type of person you are going to
meet and what type of future you are looking forward,
involving that person in your life; so based on
that…one should be prepared. This is life and in life,
there is no retakes…only one shot.
From India, Coimbatore
733First Impression is not the Last Impression - Changing
your First Impression
Introduction
Earlier, they use to say that “Your First Impression
is the last impression” and now, they say that “your
first impression is not the last impression but
long-lasting impression. Hence, there is a scope to
rectify your “first impression” and at times there is
also a need to do so. There are times when we think
that we have made a mistake…we should not have carried
ourselves the way we did and then we look forward to
one chance to correct our “first impression”.
In this article, we will be discussing about this and
other related issues such as things you should do or
should not do to make a “Perfect” first impression;
what will you do to change your first impression and
will you give one more chance to someone to rectify
his / her first impression.
Understanding the term – “First Impression” (FI)
Before talking about “First Impression” (FI), lets
discuss, what is “impression” to start with. Though,
your looks and appearance is a part of your impression
but that is not the only thing, which matters. Your
impression means your overall personality and it
consists of:
1) The Way you carry yourself
2) Your Dress-up
3) The way you express yourself
4) Your Mannerism
5) Your Behavior
6) Your Communication
7) The way you treat the other person
These all are the traits which consist of impression
and thereby are related to your FI.
For an impression to be called as FI, this must be
your first meeting with that person. FI can be of two
types – Planned and Unplanned. It is planned, when you
are aware of it. For example,
1) Your job - interview,
2) Business meeting with client,
3) Dating,
4) You are invited as a guest
FI can be planned, when you are not prepared for it.
For example, people looking at you when you are
walking down the street; when you are traveling; when
you are just passing through a place, you are at a
place where people around you hardly matters to you
etc.
This first impression process occurs in every new
situation. Within the first few seconds, people pass
judgment on you – looking for common surface clues.
Once the first impression is made, it is virtually
irreversible.
The process works like this:
A. If you appear to be of comparable business or
social level, you are considered suitable for further
interaction.
B. If you appear to be of higher business or social
status, you are admired and cultivated as a valuable
contact.
C. If you appear to be of lower business or social
standing, you are tolerated but kept at arm's length.
If you are in an interview situation, you can either
appear to match the corporate culture or not,
ultimately affecting the outcome.
For the purpose of this article, we will be
concentrating on Planned FI because people making an
impression about you, when you are walking down the
street, hardly matters to anyone.
Changing your FI
Now, let’s discuss about this. Suppose you are at the
receiving end, you met a person and he made certain
opinion about you, it can be about your behavior or
the way you carry yourself. Or he has read about you
or has heard about you and based on that there was
already some notion in his mind. You know that you are
not what the other person is thinking or assuming
about you. Will you make an attempt to correct that
impression or assumption?
I asked this question in some of my training programs.
I have asked this question to 748 people. I also
discussed this with some of my friends. Around 67% of
them said, “NO”. They will not make any attempt to
change FI. They said that it hardly matter to us. Let
anyone carry any impression that they want to carry.
26% said that once they know, what type of impression
the other person is carrying, they might make an
attempt to change that impression. 7% respondents
remain neutral.
In my views, I think we are taking things a bit too
lightly. It is true that, with so many people around
us, it hardly matters what people think about you but
if we take it in a positive manner, people will not
remember who you are; they will not remember how you
look like, but they will always remember how you made
them feel like; how you treated them; how you behaved
with them. I think it is very important to have a good
impression. That is how people will remember you.
Hence, though there is a very little possibility that
you get “another chance” to rectify your impression
but if you get, make a best use of it.
Giving a Chance to Someone to Improve the First
Impression
Let’s be fair on this. We all know that your first
impression might not be the impression that you want
to create. Just, only in this article we also proved
that. I asked one more question in my training
programs. I have asked this question to 748 people. I
also discussed this with some of my friends. We
discussed the scenarios that suppose you are the
person who is judging another person. You met a person
and made certain opinion about him or her. Your
assumptions about the person might not be correct. So,
will you give that person another chance to rectify
that “first-impression”? How easy or difficult will it
be for you to change your first impression about that
person? Around 34% respondents said that for them the
first impression is the final impression and they will
go by their gut feeling. 59% respondents said that
they will give as many chances as possible to that
person to rectify his / her FI. 7% respondents were
neutral.
As some people expressed above that though they will
be giving chances and opportunities to other people to
rectify their first-impression but at the same time
they also agreed that with this the other person will
only be able to change the opinion and the
first-impression will remain unchanged and locked in
the memory. Hence, it is very important to go that
extra mile and make a knock-out first impression.
Factors one should consider while making first
impression
Basic principles to make the BEST “First Impression”
A. A Winning Smile: “Smile and the world smiles too.”
So there’s nothing like a smile to create a good first
impression. A warm and confident smile will put both
you and the other person at ease. So smiling is a
winner when it comes to great first impressions. But
don't go overboard with this - people who take this
too far can seem insincere and smarmy, or can be seen
to be "lightweights".
B. A Word about Individuality: The good news is you
can usually create a good impression without total
conformity or losing your individuality. Yes, to make
a good first impression you do need to “fit in” to
some degree. But it all goes back to being appropriate
for the situation. If in a business setting, wear
appropriate business attire. If at a formal evening
social event, wear appropriate evening attire. And
express your individuality appropriately within that
context.
C. Be on Time: The person you are meeting for the
first time is not interested in your “good excuse” for
running late. Plan to arrive a few minutes early. And
allow flexibility for possible delays in traffic or
taking a wrong turn. Arriving early is much better
that arriving late, hands down, and is the first step
in creating a great first impression.
D. Be Yourself, Be at Ease: If you are feeling
uncomfortable and on edge, this can make the other
person ill at ease and that’s a sure way to create the
wrong impression. If you are calm and confident, so
the other person will feel more at ease, and so have a
solid foundation for making that first impression a
good one.
E. Be Open and Confident: When it comes to making the
first impression, body language as well as appearance
speaks much louder than words. Use your body language
to project appropriate confidence and self-assurance.
Stand tall, smile (of course), make eye contact, greet
with a firm handshake. All of this will help you
project confidence and encourage both you and the
other person feel better at ease.
Almost everyone gets a little nervous when meeting
someone for the first time, which can lead to nervous
habits or sweaty palms. By being aware of your nervous
habits, you can try to keep them in check. And
controlling a nervous jitter or a nervous laugh will
give you confidence and help the other person feel at
ease.
F. Be Positive: Your attitude shows through in
everything you do. Project a positive attitude, even
in the face of criticism or in the case of
nervousness. Strive to learn from your meeting and to
contribute appropriately, maintaining an upbeat manner
and a smile.
G. Be Courteous and Attentive: It goes without saying
that good manners and polite, attentive and courteous
behavior help make a good first impression. In fact,
anything less can ruin the one chance you have at
making that first impression. So be on your best
behavior. One modern manner worth mentioning is “turn
off your mobile phone”. What first impression will you
create if you are already speaking to someone other
than the person you are meeting for the first time?
Your new acquaintance deserves 100% of your attention.
Anything less and you’ll create a less than good first
impression.
H. Present Yourself Appropriately: Of course physical
appearance matters. The person you are meeting for the
first time does not know you and your appearance is
usually the first clue he or she has to go on. But it
certainly does not mean you need to look like a model
to create a strong and positive first impression. The
key to a good impression is to present yourself
appropriately.
Start with the way you dress. What is the appropriate
dress for the meeting or occasion? For business and
social meetings, appropriate dress also varies between
countries and cultures, so it’s something that you
should pay particular attention to when in an
unfamiliar setting or country. Make sure you know the
traditions and norms.
Appropriate dressing and grooming help make a good
first impression and also help you feel “the part”,
and so feel more calm and confident. Add all of this
up and you are well on your way to creating a good
first impression.
I. Small Talk Goes a Long Way…: Conversations are
based on verbal give and take. It may help you to
prepare questions you have for the person you are
meeting for the first time beforehand. Or, take a few
minutes to learn something about the person you meet
for the first time before you get together. For
instance, does he play golf? Does she work with a
local charitable foundation? Is there anything that
you know of that you have in common with the person
you are meeting? If so, this can be a great way to
open the conversation and to keep it flowing.
Conclusion
There is no doubt that your first impression is very
important and most of the times you get only one
chance to make that knocking impact. It is also true
that usually you do not get another chance to rectify
your first impression. However, if you are lucky
enough to get another chance, hold that with both
hands and make an everlasting impact. Here, there are
two types of people…people at your workplace, people
in your family and those with whom you meet
occasionally, once in a year or so…one should take
care of that.
At the end, I only like to say, that it is very
important to know the type of person you are going to
meet and what type of future you are looking forward,
involving that person in your life; so based on
that…one should be prepared. This is life and in life,
there is no retakes…only one shot.
From India, Coimbatore
Hi,
You are right. First impression is not the last impression, even though it may give you a headstart in the beginning. But, as I keep telling to my collegues..... First impression may be the last impression at the break of dawn, but what is important is LASTING IMPRESSION at the end of the day !!!
Regards,
Naresh Taneja
From India, Mumbai
You are right. First impression is not the last impression, even though it may give you a headstart in the beginning. But, as I keep telling to my collegues..... First impression may be the last impression at the break of dawn, but what is important is LASTING IMPRESSION at the end of the day !!!
Regards,
Naresh Taneja
From India, Mumbai
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