Hi All Friends
Well as per my opinion this is all going to be there no matter how much we discuss. The only way we can try sorting it out is how we see the thing going on in the world. Many times as said earlier by someone in the discussion that the ratio of such events happening from male and female is almost the same.
And one more thing is it is also how you present yourself in front of other so that they dont dare to talk such bullshit in front of you.
Regards
Ank
From India, Pune
3Well as per my opinion this is all going to be there no matter how much we discuss. The only way we can try sorting it out is how we see the thing going on in the world. Many times as said earlier by someone in the discussion that the ratio of such events happening from male and female is almost the same.
And one more thing is it is also how you present yourself in front of other so that they dont dare to talk such bullshit in front of you.
Regards
Ank
From India, Pune
Ms. Sari,
I agree with you the topic you discussed herewith.Undoubtedly it happens in every workplace where both the sexes are working. It'll be absolutely foolish to put blame on one community(male) as a whole for such type of incident(s). Clapping is not possible with one hand. But, admittedly male communities at the work place are 60-70% responsible for such type of incidents & the rest 30-40% responsibility must go to female worker(s)/Executive(s). Those (talking about female colleagues) are purely ambitious to reach the top of the ladder ,they never hesitate to sacrifice their personality to get their dues or undues. At present, there're so many Acts and Rules to check sexual abuse at the workplace and even penal provisions are there to punish the culprit behind such incidents but, it remains on pen & paper. But my question is "Can we be able to avoid such sexual activitie(s)/abuse(s) at the workplace? It all depends on someone's mentality. As you disussed,one of your friends jumped to the modelling world due to some undisclosed reasons & she is now a celebrity figure. Once a celeble status comes to you in one night, no mantra(s) or tantra(s) will prevent you to march ahead which is what happens specially in media line & now the same is seen at the office executive level.Such "Give & Take" (in terms of sex) policy definitely hampers the work culture of any establishment.Finally, I would like to appreciate your views posted hereby which reflects the clear picture. Thanks & all wishes to you.
With best regards,
[Biswajit Pani]
E-mail Id :
From India, Bhubaneswar
I agree with you the topic you discussed herewith.Undoubtedly it happens in every workplace where both the sexes are working. It'll be absolutely foolish to put blame on one community(male) as a whole for such type of incident(s). Clapping is not possible with one hand. But, admittedly male communities at the work place are 60-70% responsible for such type of incidents & the rest 30-40% responsibility must go to female worker(s)/Executive(s). Those (talking about female colleagues) are purely ambitious to reach the top of the ladder ,they never hesitate to sacrifice their personality to get their dues or undues. At present, there're so many Acts and Rules to check sexual abuse at the workplace and even penal provisions are there to punish the culprit behind such incidents but, it remains on pen & paper. But my question is "Can we be able to avoid such sexual activitie(s)/abuse(s) at the workplace? It all depends on someone's mentality. As you disussed,one of your friends jumped to the modelling world due to some undisclosed reasons & she is now a celebrity figure. Once a celeble status comes to you in one night, no mantra(s) or tantra(s) will prevent you to march ahead which is what happens specially in media line & now the same is seen at the office executive level.Such "Give & Take" (in terms of sex) policy definitely hampers the work culture of any establishment.Finally, I would like to appreciate your views posted hereby which reflects the clear picture. Thanks & all wishes to you.
With best regards,
[Biswajit Pani]
E-mail Id :
From India, Bhubaneswar
Hi,
As Ms. Sari said, I also faced a similar kind of experience when i was working with a Leading private sector Bank as a Marketing executive. The person to whom i was reporting to was asking similar kind of dinner in turn he will give me some good leads. He used to give me calls in the late night hours and used to drag the conversation unnecessarily. Since that was my first job i was not sure how i should react to that situation.
Then finally one day i decided and said no to him on the face and left the job. I never met him after that.
I have been told by my other colleagues that this is very common and if you want promotion or good leads then you have to accept this. Since I never wanted such kind of leads or promotion i quit my job.
Now I'm happy for the decision that i have taken then.
Rgds
Anu
From India, Madras
As Ms. Sari said, I also faced a similar kind of experience when i was working with a Leading private sector Bank as a Marketing executive. The person to whom i was reporting to was asking similar kind of dinner in turn he will give me some good leads. He used to give me calls in the late night hours and used to drag the conversation unnecessarily. Since that was my first job i was not sure how i should react to that situation.
Then finally one day i decided and said no to him on the face and left the job. I never met him after that.
I have been told by my other colleagues that this is very common and if you want promotion or good leads then you have to accept this. Since I never wanted such kind of leads or promotion i quit my job.
Now I'm happy for the decision that i have taken then.
Rgds
Anu
From India, Madras
Hi All,
Aptly put by Sanjeev and others... "Give and Take" is the base of any relationship...more so, on this topic!
Skills, Competencies and Abilities are all GOOD criteria for selecting the BEST person.
But then, as again perfectly mentioned by some - PRIORITIES in life define your ACTIONS
Boss's priority is having a good time NOW
Subordinate's priority is having a good time in FUTURE
This is the END.
What MEANS you take to achieve your END... is what DEFINES what happens NEXT - SLAP and SLEEP !!
We need to first THINK and then ACT and not the other way round
Cheers
K
From India, Madras
Aptly put by Sanjeev and others... "Give and Take" is the base of any relationship...more so, on this topic!
Skills, Competencies and Abilities are all GOOD criteria for selecting the BEST person.
But then, as again perfectly mentioned by some - PRIORITIES in life define your ACTIONS
Boss's priority is having a good time NOW
Subordinate's priority is having a good time in FUTURE
This is the END.
What MEANS you take to achieve your END... is what DEFINES what happens NEXT - SLAP and SLEEP !!
We need to first THINK and then ACT and not the other way round
Cheers
K
From India, Madras
Hi to All,
The topic is bold and touchy. Few days back I saw a movie Corporate which gives you the clear picture of this bold topic.
Why to talk about movie, I have one example with me. One of my cousins faced this problem in her office only. Initially it was fine but one fine day her Boss proposed her and asked her for a night, she got shocked and moved out of his ROOM. Then he warn her not to tell anybody otherwise he will blame her She was always worried about her BOSS, because he generally asks after that Incident. So it not the matter of Men or Women ……. It’s just a matter of chance.
She says quite and left the Jobs, bze of him…..So this is both ways.
Well you can’t blame to females candidates who get such Offers, these days even gentleman also get such proposals from Women BOSSES.
Rdgs,
Rinky
From India, Lucknow
The topic is bold and touchy. Few days back I saw a movie Corporate which gives you the clear picture of this bold topic.
Why to talk about movie, I have one example with me. One of my cousins faced this problem in her office only. Initially it was fine but one fine day her Boss proposed her and asked her for a night, she got shocked and moved out of his ROOM. Then he warn her not to tell anybody otherwise he will blame her She was always worried about her BOSS, because he generally asks after that Incident. So it not the matter of Men or Women ……. It’s just a matter of chance.
She says quite and left the Jobs, bze of him…..So this is both ways.
Well you can’t blame to females candidates who get such Offers, these days even gentleman also get such proposals from Women BOSSES.
Rdgs,
Rinky
From India, Lucknow
It is heartening to note that topics that are earlier considered taboo for discussion in public fora are being openly discussed everywhere now. I personally do not believe that using sex as a tool for career advancement, or even as a means of workplace stress buster, is a new phenomenon. But has it become more prevalent now than before? A moot question indeed!
One school of thought is that if your boss is a sucker who has no qualms about seeking sexual favours from junior colleagues and giving privileges in return, and nobody gets hurt in the bargain, why not! After all, the world that we live in has become more permissive than ever now.
But what if the undue 'favour' results in somebody more deserving being denied a rightful promotion or raise? What is either or both the parties are married, and as always, the female employee involved gets branded as a home wrecker (I am not insinuating that the boss is always the male)? Even if we ignore the moral issues involved, we can not ignore the possibility of careers, along with personal lives, getting ruined because of such unholy alliances, instead of it taking one places.
But then not many seem to care about the undesirable consequences. And such affairs continue to flourish in many offices. Unfortunately you don't find find many raising their voices against them either, despite there being several laws against workplace sexual harassment. Probably because it is 'the' boss who is one of the parties involved, most of the time!
From India, Mumbai
One school of thought is that if your boss is a sucker who has no qualms about seeking sexual favours from junior colleagues and giving privileges in return, and nobody gets hurt in the bargain, why not! After all, the world that we live in has become more permissive than ever now.
But what if the undue 'favour' results in somebody more deserving being denied a rightful promotion or raise? What is either or both the parties are married, and as always, the female employee involved gets branded as a home wrecker (I am not insinuating that the boss is always the male)? Even if we ignore the moral issues involved, we can not ignore the possibility of careers, along with personal lives, getting ruined because of such unholy alliances, instead of it taking one places.
But then not many seem to care about the undesirable consequences. And such affairs continue to flourish in many offices. Unfortunately you don't find find many raising their voices against them either, despite there being several laws against workplace sexual harassment. Probably because it is 'the' boss who is one of the parties involved, most of the time!
From India, Mumbai
Dear All,
It is not just a topic to talk about but it is a situation faced by many and will be faced by many. Many of us believes that it is just like a 'give & take' type policy but just imagine that can you sell out your feelings? No way. It is like to sell yourself for some bucks. One should protest firmly in such matters and keep in mind one thing that such kind of battels should be fought individually and have to initiate from yourself. No one will come to support for the first time but as you proceed further the whole world will follow you AS YOU ARE LEADING TO A RIGHT WAY. I hope that those he take it as 'give and take' policy will understand me. If I have hurt anybody in any manner kindly pardon me. I just posted my belief.
Thanks.
Note: For the above topic sex is proper word but kindly use the word 'Gender' inspite of 'Sex' for gender discremination in forms. It will give proper word to the next generation.
From India, Valsad
It is not just a topic to talk about but it is a situation faced by many and will be faced by many. Many of us believes that it is just like a 'give & take' type policy but just imagine that can you sell out your feelings? No way. It is like to sell yourself for some bucks. One should protest firmly in such matters and keep in mind one thing that such kind of battels should be fought individually and have to initiate from yourself. No one will come to support for the first time but as you proceed further the whole world will follow you AS YOU ARE LEADING TO A RIGHT WAY. I hope that those he take it as 'give and take' policy will understand me. If I have hurt anybody in any manner kindly pardon me. I just posted my belief.
Thanks.
Note: For the above topic sex is proper word but kindly use the word 'Gender' inspite of 'Sex' for gender discremination in forms. It will give proper word to the next generation.
From India, Valsad
Considering all incidents and examples shared by readers...how can you define, "Sexual Harrasment" and/or "Sexual Abuse"...at workplace? Or...how can you use the benefits of various legal acts and procedures?
To me, sexual harrasment or sexual abuse is nothing but a
"failed deal"...
"unkept promises"...
"unfulfiled commitment".
Let me explain.
A boss and subordinate and/or Big-Customer and Service Provider (Sales Executive) enter into a deal...and unfortunately they are of opposite gender...they enter into a deal / contract that in lieu of "entertainment after dinner"...one will give X to Y. It can be promotion, job, a big contract, onsite project...etc etc.
After that "entertainment"...the other party fails to keep its words...promise and commitment. And it is only then that the "Abused Party" will go to court or to public...saying that S/he has been Sexually Harrassed / Sexually Abused.
This is not true all the time but this is true...most of the time.
Do think about it.
Regards
Sanjeev Himachali
From India, Mumbai
To me, sexual harrasment or sexual abuse is nothing but a
"failed deal"...
"unkept promises"...
"unfulfiled commitment".
Let me explain.
A boss and subordinate and/or Big-Customer and Service Provider (Sales Executive) enter into a deal...and unfortunately they are of opposite gender...they enter into a deal / contract that in lieu of "entertainment after dinner"...one will give X to Y. It can be promotion, job, a big contract, onsite project...etc etc.
After that "entertainment"...the other party fails to keep its words...promise and commitment. And it is only then that the "Abused Party" will go to court or to public...saying that S/he has been Sexually Harrassed / Sexually Abused.
This is not true all the time but this is true...most of the time.
Do think about it.
Regards
Sanjeev Himachali
From India, Mumbai
Dear Sanjeev,
A bold topic in discussion. Yes, you are right., once upon a time that principle was applied in the media and other relevant industries….
I have seen such situations in the manufacturing industries…… But being in such a big structured and decent corporate environments also, people are choosing this way is really bad culture. These situations are resulting in taking incompetent people and inefficient candidates for the work spots and losing the right candidate at the right person at the right place.
Ultimately corporates are effecting a lot and competent and honest people who are very sincere at work and decent in all respects…. But friends, as Rolly says, it is not the responsibility of one either men or women., both are equally responsible. and this is not only a situation to Sari or somebody else., nowadays, this type of behaviours are really effecting competent people from the other side… you may ask, how ? the main reason is, who are having these attachments, that superiors would simply divert the workload to the other person who don’t show much interest in this matter ultimately the other person is getting overloaded. They are left with no other option other than finding other alternative that means leaving the current job and joining in a new one.
This kind of environment has to be changed…
Sanjeev, what is your idea to control these situations at corporate level ? Corporates should focus their utmost attention to avoid such embarrassing situations at all levels.
Regards,
Prasad.
From India, Bangalore
A bold topic in discussion. Yes, you are right., once upon a time that principle was applied in the media and other relevant industries….
I have seen such situations in the manufacturing industries…… But being in such a big structured and decent corporate environments also, people are choosing this way is really bad culture. These situations are resulting in taking incompetent people and inefficient candidates for the work spots and losing the right candidate at the right person at the right place.
Ultimately corporates are effecting a lot and competent and honest people who are very sincere at work and decent in all respects…. But friends, as Rolly says, it is not the responsibility of one either men or women., both are equally responsible. and this is not only a situation to Sari or somebody else., nowadays, this type of behaviours are really effecting competent people from the other side… you may ask, how ? the main reason is, who are having these attachments, that superiors would simply divert the workload to the other person who don’t show much interest in this matter ultimately the other person is getting overloaded. They are left with no other option other than finding other alternative that means leaving the current job and joining in a new one.
This kind of environment has to be changed…
Sanjeev, what is your idea to control these situations at corporate level ? Corporates should focus their utmost attention to avoid such embarrassing situations at all levels.
Regards,
Prasad.
From India, Bangalore
Prasad,
I am so glad you asked this question I was wondering what the purpose of this topic is, since whatever has been discussed so far is nothing new or different, than what is discussed in social forums for women's rights, and other such places. It is nothing than we are UNAWARE of. As I read through the original posts and various responses - I couldn't help but wonder 'WHAT's the point of discussing something like this where very little concrete can be done." There will be isolated pockets of resistance, but the rest of the world will continue the way it always has - simply because promotion, profits and such like stuff are labelled as GROWTH.
I have no suggestions on this - other than a complete mindset change or to have completely programmable human beings - also the dream of those on a power trip (read as already in power). The mindset change calls for
1) acceptance of self and others as humans
2) non-judgement of self and others
3) abandoning cravings for power, money and position.
No wonder genetics has such fascination - it seems much easier in comparison with the above mindset change. :twisted: :wink: :lol:
Dunno if the forum would agree with me - and I would definitely love to read more suggestions as to how things can improve.
So Sanjeev, to repeat Prasad's question "What is your suggestion?" - since you are the creator of this post. :)
Regards
Ryan
From India, Mumbai
I am so glad you asked this question I was wondering what the purpose of this topic is, since whatever has been discussed so far is nothing new or different, than what is discussed in social forums for women's rights, and other such places. It is nothing than we are UNAWARE of. As I read through the original posts and various responses - I couldn't help but wonder 'WHAT's the point of discussing something like this where very little concrete can be done." There will be isolated pockets of resistance, but the rest of the world will continue the way it always has - simply because promotion, profits and such like stuff are labelled as GROWTH.
I have no suggestions on this - other than a complete mindset change or to have completely programmable human beings - also the dream of those on a power trip (read as already in power). The mindset change calls for
1) acceptance of self and others as humans
2) non-judgement of self and others
3) abandoning cravings for power, money and position.
No wonder genetics has such fascination - it seems much easier in comparison with the above mindset change. :twisted: :wink: :lol:
Dunno if the forum would agree with me - and I would definitely love to read more suggestions as to how things can improve.
So Sanjeev, to repeat Prasad's question "What is your suggestion?" - since you are the creator of this post. :)
Regards
Ryan
From India, Mumbai
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