Dear Seniors,

In my 5-year career as an HR professional, on many occasions, my seniors and colleagues have told me that I am straightforward, and that's not suitable for the HR field. They suggest I need to be diplomatic to be successful.

How true is this?

Regards,
Sudha

From India, Mettupalayam
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Dear Sudha,

Whether one is an HR functionary or otherwise, one has to be diplomatic anyway.

A straightforward person:

a) Tells the truth, whether the other person likes it or not.
b) Says "yes" or "no" upfront.
c) Does not camouflage his/her feelings.
d) Does not sugarcoat his/her words.

In contrast, a diplomatic person does the same job with a little nicety. A diplomatic person:

a) Uses interpersonal skills to the core.
b) Does not show a mirror to the other person if it is not called for.
c) Does not speak about others' weaknesses unnecessarily.
d) Does not tell the truth if it is not required. He/she follows the following Sanskrit shloka:

"सत्यं ब्रूयात् प्रियं ब्रूयात् न ब्रूयात् सत्यमप्रियम्,
प्रियं च नानृतं ब्रूयादेष धर्मः सनातनः॥"

- Manusmriti, Verse 4.138

Meaning: One must speak truthfully and dearly, but not speaking unpleasant truth and not speaking dear untruth is "Sanatana Dharma."

Qualities of a Diplomatic Person: A diplomatic person sometimes ensures that things are done without saying anything. Otherwise, a diplomatic person ensures that someone else speaks what he/she wants to say. However, being diplomatic does not mean being submissive. Being diplomatic requires being assertive or having great control over emotions.

An Example of being Straightforward and being Diplomatic: It is as below:

A manager joins newly. He does not like the internal environment. He finds that work slows down because of the lack of basic facilities. After a few weeks, his senior asks how he feels to be in the company. Following are the replies for each category:

A Straightforward Manager: Sometimes it is boring to work here as even basic facilities are not provided.

A Diplomatic Manager: Hygienic factors have not allowed my motivation to get hit.

Living a Life of Values and Principles: When one is diplomatic or a straightforward person, one must live a life of values and principles. Being diplomatic need not mean doing a trade-off with the values. Of course, it is also a challenge, but one has to live with it.

Thanks,

Dinesh Divekar

From India, Bangalore
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Dear Sir,

Thank you very much for your clear explanation. I truly appreciate your answer.

In my organization, there have been times when I was forced to handle situations diplomatically, and employees have felt that being straightforward with the truth would have been better.

I understand that depending on the situation, I may need to be either straightforward or diplomatic.

Regards,
Sudha

From India, Mettupalayam
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Sharing of information “to be diplomatic or to be successful”.

My life experience, when I was a HR-Manager for big group, (a ‘small fish in a big pond’ )with multi state location. All of you aware in our old system, whenever any General Manager is posted on transfer, from one state to another, the first thing, certain positions including HR, functions, while in the process of system and personnel to be to revamped to his personal choices. Preferably his favorite to be transferred /re located from his earlier location.

I was caught in one such trap, in the sense, one fine morning, the new General Manager, called me to his cabin, and asked me ‘that he wanted me, to find out a way to generate one lakh revenue, for the Ladies Club, on an urgent basis,. The Ladies club was active in that residential colony. (Wife of General Manager was nominated as new President).

I know for certain that if I say that ‘Not possible, either I will be out of employment, or transferred to another remote place. Taken time for 24 hours to reply, came sat in my office. Thinking and again thinking for more than 6 hours and finally contacted few external advertisement agencies.

Next day exactly after 24 hours, I reported before the young energetic General Manager,in his cabin, and said boldly, that I could generate one lakh fund directly to Ladies Club, subject to Management extending permission to fix advertisement hoardings, by two external agencies, inside the space adjourning the colony area, on 12 months lease basis, facing national high way.

The result was fantastic / memorable, not only General Manager got out of the chair and hugged and lifted me, but also an invitation was extended to the Head office / corporate office at Bombay, with gifts, promotions for recognition of creative ideas. The same idea was later suggested to all group works.

From India, Madras
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KK!HR
1655

We are taught to call a spade a spade, but later life has taught us to be milder and more diplomatic. In trying to be diplomatic, one shall not be Machiavellian. Be true to your words, try to fulfill all commitments made, and in case you encounter a problem, take the initiative and inform the other party before they check on the progress. Remember that credibility matters a lot in the HR field; perceptions can make or break a person, especially for an HR professional who should be seen as reliable.
From India, Mumbai
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Dear Colleague,

Very great and valuable insights given by our colleagues for your query.

To add:

At least 6 out of 10 HR professionals will have such a dilemma in their career. A very good point to discuss.

HR, being a profession that deals with people, has to be handled in a way that brings a win-win situation between different segments. In this case, the HR professional has to create their own style and have their own brand. As you have been in the field for around 5 years, soon you will have your own brand that you never compromise. Be honest as you are now and never compromise for the benefit of a few reasons. BE YOURSELF AND HAVE YOUR REAL IMAGE.

No one - employees, managers, unions, government officials, management - will dare to bend you for any of their desires when they understand that your brand is this. To establish this, you need to demonstrate that you are like this and that you will not compromise your basic values and qualities.

There may be a few ups and downs in your career, but at the end of the career, you will have a lot of satisfaction and pride. Be yourself. You can be tactful for your profession without compromising your good qualities and value system but for the overall benefit of the organization, business, and the wellness of employees.

So be TACTFUL without compromising your VALUE SYSTEM. Practice this and create your OWN BRAND. God bless.

From India, Chennai
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In addition to the above posts, you may find this presentation helpful.

I think being diplomatic is an art and skill, and if we work on it, we can develop it over a period of time.

All the best.

From India, Delhi
Attached Files (Download Requires Membership)
File Type: pdf 10 Simple Ways to Combat Office Politics.pdf (765.1 KB, 116 views)

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Dear Sudha,

It's all about discovering new ways of calling a spade a spade. In order to convey something, one has to be very careful about tweaking the message without diluting it.

Hope these two lines help.

Regards,
Amol Nakve

From India, Mumbai
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Dear Sudha,

First, you need to understand that being straightforward does not mean being rude. It means that you tell the truth. If you do it while empathizing with the people involved or affected, you will probably do well. In some cases, you have no option but to follow a particular path; you need to be able to tell that also truthfully. That is being straightforward.

In contrast, being diplomatic does not mean you need to lie or avoid telling the truth or hiding a fact. It actually means that you need to be tactful. Where possible, instead of telling a harsh reality, if you can find another way to convey the same without hiding the fact or compromising on your duty, that is an important HR skill.

A very basic example: If you have someone who will lose his job if he is not punctual, you can either call him and tell him he will be fired, or you can call him and discuss his lack of punctuality and how it affects work, organization, discipline, and rules. At the same time, you need to be clear to him that he needs to improve and warn him that if improvements are not visible, soon the management is likely to terminate his services.

In the above case, you are being diplomatic as well as straightforward. The two are not mutually exclusive.

From India, Mumbai
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What’s a Great Topic to Discussion, Always Getting Knowledge, Motivation, Skills to Read Mr Divekar Ji .
From India, New Delhi
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