~~~~ SMS COLLECTION ~~~~~
U may b out of my sight but not out of my heart. U may b out of my reach but not out of my mind. I don't know what I mean 2 u, but u'll always be special 2 me.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Sharp is ur memory, sweet is ur name, deep in my heart u'll always remain. Earth wants water, flower wants dew, I want nothing but a smile from u.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Too many stars in the sky, too many tears that have left my eyes. Too many girls out in the blue, but they are nothing compared to you!
* * * * * * * * * *
• I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?
* * * * * * * * * *
• Those who can't have u hate u, those who have u can't handle u, those who abuse u lose u, & then there are those like me who just can't refuse u!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Even if I had 1 wish... I wouldn't wish for u to love me, coz I don't want your love to come from a wish... but straight from your heart.
* * * * * * * * * *
• The sky without stars is like sleep without dreams, like a song without music, like a rose without smell, like a face without smile, like ME without U!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Without ur SMS days are like: Moanday, Tearsday, Wasteday, Thirstday, Frightday, Shattereday & Sadday. So send me SMS everyday.
* * * * * * * * * *
• I don't care how many lips u hv kissed, how many shoulders u have embraced & how many times u’ve said, I luv u! All I care is not b the first but 2 b ur last!
* * * * * * * * * *
• U may be out of my sight, but not out of my heart. U may be out of my reach, but not out of my mind. I may mean nothing to u but u'll always be special to me
* * * * * * * * * *
• I'm a cop and you are under arrest on account of being you. It is illegal to be as lovable as you r. Now you get a life sentence in my heart.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Hey, I just got your blood test report. U have been tested HIV positive. Report reads person has high percentage of Honey In Veins. No Wonder!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Only the open heart receives love, only the open mind receives wisdom, only the open hand receives gifts and only the cute persons receive SMS from me!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Hello!! What's wrong with your mobile?Tried so many times but Every time I call it says: The subscriber your are trying to reach is in your heart!
* * * * * * * * * *
• If u see some one without a smile, give him one of urns, coz u r among a few good people who can shine others lives by just walking with him a few miles
* * * * * * * * * *
• Don't send any messages, I don't want to see you, hear your voice, think of you, coz my doctor advised me 2 keep away from Sweets.
* * * * * * * * * *
• I’ll give u one kiss to go to sleep. I’ll give u two kisses to dream. I’ll give u an endless row of kisses to, when u wake up in the morning, think of me.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Boy: Jaaneman, is dil mein aaja!Gal: Sandal utaaroon kya?Boy: Are pagli, yeh koi mandir thodi hai, aise hi aaja!
* * * * * * * * * *
• In da mornin I don’t eat coz I think of u, at noon I don’t eat coz I think of u, in da evenin I don’t eat coz I think of u, at night I don’t sleep coz Im hungry
* * * * * * * * * *
• Kissing you baby is my dream. I'm the strawberry & u r the cream. Handle me gently keep me real keen. U & I together babes is passion so extreme!
* * * * * * * * * *
• One who smokes has a smoky heart; one who drinks has an alcoholic heart. So dear U must STOP eating sweets as u r already a SWEETEHART!
* * * * * * * * * *
• I know you think I'm cute, I know you think I'm fine, but like the other guys, take a number and wait in line!
* * * * * * * * * *
• I wanted to put something incredibly beautiful, sweet, nice, sensitive, erotic and funny on you screen, but unfortunately I do not fit on it.
* * * * * * * * * *
• If all the girls lived on the other side of the sea, what a good swimmer I would be?
* * * * * * * * * *
• Excuse me, do u have a Band-Aid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you.
* * * * * * * * * *
• If I could be any part of you, I’d be your tear. To be conceived in your heart, born in your eyes, live on your cheeks, and die on your lips.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Ek tanha raat me apki yaad aayi, tanhai mitane ko humne ek cigrate sulgai, na jaane kaise qayamat ho gayi ke dhooeein ne bhi apki tasvir banayi.
* * * * * * * * * *
I luv ur eyes I luv ur smile. I cherish ur ways, I adore ur style. What can I say? U r one of a kind & 24/7 u r on my mind!
* * * * * * * * * *
• do u believe in love at first site or do i have to walk by again?
* * * * * * * * * *
• I luv ur eyes I luv ur smile. I cherish ur ways, I adore ur style. What can I say? U r one of a kind & 24/7 u r on my mind!
* * * * * * * * * *
• If love & friendship could be brought or sold as if they were Stocks & Shares those wise enough to invest in you SEXY would all be millionaires! !!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Faith makes all things possible, love makes all things easy, hopes makes all things work, but ur gorgeous smile brings all faith, luv & hope in me!
* * * * * * * * * *
• A peach is a peach, a plum is a plum, a kiss isn't a kiss without the tongue, so open ur mouth & close ur eyes & give ur tongue some exercise.
* * * * * * * * * *
• U can b a doctor & save lives, a lawyer & defend lives, a soldier & protect lives or simply b urself, a sweet person who touches hearts!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Those who can't have u hate u, those who have u can't handle u, those who abuse u lose u, & then there are those like me who just can't refuse u!
* * * * * * * * * *
• I used to think that dreams do not come true, but this quickly changed the moment I laid my eyes on you.
* * * * * * * * * *
• There are Tulips in my garden, there are Tulips in the park but nothing is more beautiful then our two lips meeting in the dark!
* * * * * * * * * *
smartman + smart nari = fighting jari
smartman + bevakuf nari = barbadi,,,,,
bevakuf man + smart nari = Jeb khali &
Bevakifman + bevakuf nari = SHAADI
From India, Bangalore
32U may b out of my sight but not out of my heart. U may b out of my reach but not out of my mind. I don't know what I mean 2 u, but u'll always be special 2 me.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Sharp is ur memory, sweet is ur name, deep in my heart u'll always remain. Earth wants water, flower wants dew, I want nothing but a smile from u.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Too many stars in the sky, too many tears that have left my eyes. Too many girls out in the blue, but they are nothing compared to you!
* * * * * * * * * *
• I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?
* * * * * * * * * *
• Those who can't have u hate u, those who have u can't handle u, those who abuse u lose u, & then there are those like me who just can't refuse u!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Even if I had 1 wish... I wouldn't wish for u to love me, coz I don't want your love to come from a wish... but straight from your heart.
* * * * * * * * * *
• The sky without stars is like sleep without dreams, like a song without music, like a rose without smell, like a face without smile, like ME without U!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Without ur SMS days are like: Moanday, Tearsday, Wasteday, Thirstday, Frightday, Shattereday & Sadday. So send me SMS everyday.
* * * * * * * * * *
• I don't care how many lips u hv kissed, how many shoulders u have embraced & how many times u’ve said, I luv u! All I care is not b the first but 2 b ur last!
* * * * * * * * * *
• U may be out of my sight, but not out of my heart. U may be out of my reach, but not out of my mind. I may mean nothing to u but u'll always be special to me
* * * * * * * * * *
• I'm a cop and you are under arrest on account of being you. It is illegal to be as lovable as you r. Now you get a life sentence in my heart.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Hey, I just got your blood test report. U have been tested HIV positive. Report reads person has high percentage of Honey In Veins. No Wonder!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Only the open heart receives love, only the open mind receives wisdom, only the open hand receives gifts and only the cute persons receive SMS from me!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Hello!! What's wrong with your mobile?Tried so many times but Every time I call it says: The subscriber your are trying to reach is in your heart!
* * * * * * * * * *
• If u see some one without a smile, give him one of urns, coz u r among a few good people who can shine others lives by just walking with him a few miles
* * * * * * * * * *
• Don't send any messages, I don't want to see you, hear your voice, think of you, coz my doctor advised me 2 keep away from Sweets.
* * * * * * * * * *
• I’ll give u one kiss to go to sleep. I’ll give u two kisses to dream. I’ll give u an endless row of kisses to, when u wake up in the morning, think of me.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Boy: Jaaneman, is dil mein aaja!Gal: Sandal utaaroon kya?Boy: Are pagli, yeh koi mandir thodi hai, aise hi aaja!
* * * * * * * * * *
• In da mornin I don’t eat coz I think of u, at noon I don’t eat coz I think of u, in da evenin I don’t eat coz I think of u, at night I don’t sleep coz Im hungry
* * * * * * * * * *
• Kissing you baby is my dream. I'm the strawberry & u r the cream. Handle me gently keep me real keen. U & I together babes is passion so extreme!
* * * * * * * * * *
• One who smokes has a smoky heart; one who drinks has an alcoholic heart. So dear U must STOP eating sweets as u r already a SWEETEHART!
* * * * * * * * * *
• I know you think I'm cute, I know you think I'm fine, but like the other guys, take a number and wait in line!
* * * * * * * * * *
• I wanted to put something incredibly beautiful, sweet, nice, sensitive, erotic and funny on you screen, but unfortunately I do not fit on it.
* * * * * * * * * *
• If all the girls lived on the other side of the sea, what a good swimmer I would be?
* * * * * * * * * *
• Excuse me, do u have a Band-Aid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you.
* * * * * * * * * *
• If I could be any part of you, I’d be your tear. To be conceived in your heart, born in your eyes, live on your cheeks, and die on your lips.
* * * * * * * * * *
• Ek tanha raat me apki yaad aayi, tanhai mitane ko humne ek cigrate sulgai, na jaane kaise qayamat ho gayi ke dhooeein ne bhi apki tasvir banayi.
* * * * * * * * * *
I luv ur eyes I luv ur smile. I cherish ur ways, I adore ur style. What can I say? U r one of a kind & 24/7 u r on my mind!
* * * * * * * * * *
• do u believe in love at first site or do i have to walk by again?
* * * * * * * * * *
• I luv ur eyes I luv ur smile. I cherish ur ways, I adore ur style. What can I say? U r one of a kind & 24/7 u r on my mind!
* * * * * * * * * *
• If love & friendship could be brought or sold as if they were Stocks & Shares those wise enough to invest in you SEXY would all be millionaires! !!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Faith makes all things possible, love makes all things easy, hopes makes all things work, but ur gorgeous smile brings all faith, luv & hope in me!
* * * * * * * * * *
• A peach is a peach, a plum is a plum, a kiss isn't a kiss without the tongue, so open ur mouth & close ur eyes & give ur tongue some exercise.
* * * * * * * * * *
• U can b a doctor & save lives, a lawyer & defend lives, a soldier & protect lives or simply b urself, a sweet person who touches hearts!
* * * * * * * * * *
• Those who can't have u hate u, those who have u can't handle u, those who abuse u lose u, & then there are those like me who just can't refuse u!
* * * * * * * * * *
• I used to think that dreams do not come true, but this quickly changed the moment I laid my eyes on you.
* * * * * * * * * *
• There are Tulips in my garden, there are Tulips in the park but nothing is more beautiful then our two lips meeting in the dark!
* * * * * * * * * *
smartman + smart nari = fighting jari
smartman + bevakuf nari = barbadi,,,,,
bevakuf man + smart nari = Jeb khali &
Bevakifman + bevakuf nari = SHAADI
From India, Bangalore
HI.............COLLECTION.....................
1 A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after
Every 10 sec a
woman gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.
2 Sardar-why r all these people running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r
others running?
3 Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence
into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".
4 Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He was
not sure as to what to be filled in column "Salary
Expected".
After much thought he wrote: Yes!
5 Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants. Servant
it’s already raining. Sardar: So what? Take an
umbrella and go.
6 Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket. Dealer
gave 11cr after
deducting tax. Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 cr or else
return my 20 Rs
back.
7 Postman:- I Have To Come 5 Miles To Deliver U This Packet
Sardar:- why did u come so far. Instead u could have
posted it....
8 Sardar's wish :when i die,i wana die like my grandpa who died
peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all the
passengers in the
car he was driving..
9 Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible
looking thing is
what you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!
10 Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: "I'm writing to my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.
11 Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab . Local
sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still
digging for more..
12 A man asked sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes walking at evening not
in the morning. Sardarji replied "Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM".
13 Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Darling : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Darling : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem Can there be greater than this one?
14 Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles
and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or
troubles.
Girl: Well that is because we aren't married yet.
15 Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to
give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.
16 A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if
my father hadn't left me a fortune?" "Honey," the woman replied Sweetly,
"I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"
17 Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
18 A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..
My Father grows beans," said one student. "My father cooks beans," said
another.
Then little Johnny spoke up: "We are all human beans."
19 Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire? "
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman.
Interviewer: "What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"
20 Its funny when people discuss over "love marriage" and "arranged marriage"
It is like asking a person if he would like to "hang himself" or "shoot himself".
21 What is a girl friend?
Addition of problems, subtraction of money, multiplication of enemies & division of friends.
22 Guide: "I welcome you all to Niagara Falls. These are the world's largest
waterfalls and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high, even 20
supersonic planes passing by can't be heard.
Now may I request the ladies to keep quite so that we can hear the Niagara
Falls?"
23 Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist.
If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for seven years.
The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board overlooking an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.
The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.
Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.
The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump.
"Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor.
To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can't swim!"
24 As a old man was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.
Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him,
"Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!"
"It's not just one car," said Herman, "It's hundreds of them!"
25 Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
26 What's the definition of lawyer?
The larval form of a politician
27 Sardar comes back 2 his car & finds a note saying "Parking Fine"
28 How do you recognize a Sardar in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.
29 once a Sardhar was walking and had a glove on one hand and not on other so the man asked him why did he do so. He Replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot.
30 Sardarji bought a brand new Maruti and decided to drive down from Amritsar, where he lived, to Jalandar to meet his friend. He reached there in a few hours.
After spending a few days there, he decided to return, and called up his mother to expect him in the evening. But he didn't reach in the evening and not the next day either. "
When he finally reached home on the third day, his distraught mother ran and asked him " Arre Puttar, ki hoya?
(What Happened, My Son?)
31 The Sardarji got out, obviously very tired from a long journey, and said, "Oy, ye Marutti wale pagal hain, agge jaane waaste chaar gear banaate hain, )
aur pichche jaane waaste sirf ik?" (These Maruti Car people are crazy! They have four gears for going forward, but only one for going back!
32 Santa Singh decided to start a chicken farm so he bought a hundred chickens to begin with. A month later he returned to the dealer for another hundred chickens .
because all of the first lot had died. A month later he was back at t he dealer for another hundred chickens for the second lot had also died
'But I think I know where I'm going wrong,' said Santa, 'I think I'm planting them too deep.'
33 2 Dost Suicide karne gae, Pahala : "Hey Bhagwan muje dunia ki saari
nafrat de Pareshani de Duk de!" Dusra dost : "Abe tu maut maang raha
hai ki Reliance mai Job.
34 Q - What is the Difference Between Mother & Wife ?
A - One Woman Brings U into this world crying... & the other
ensures U Continue to do so.
35 Sardar to Shopkeeper: - Mujhe India Ka Flag Dikhao, Shopkeeper ne
Flag Dikhaya, Sardar: - Isme aur Colour Dikhao.
36 .How can a Sardar Kill a Lion ? Sardarji thinks N thinks hard &
comes to a conclusion: I'll drink poison n let lion eat me. O' bolo
ta ra ra.
37 A Chinese pair accidentally had twins without getting married, Guess
what they named them... Jo Hua, So Hua.
38 Wife : Honey ...... What are You Looking for ?
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : Nothing...?? U've been reading our marriage certificate 4 an
hour ...?? Husband : I was just looking 4 the expiry date.
39 Papa : beta har parai stri ko apni Maa samjho to tumhara character
thik ho jaaega.....Beta : Lekin Papa fir Aap ke character ka kya
hoga....???
40 Sardar: O Banno Car ki speed itani ky badha di..? biwi: Oji Car ki
break fail ho gayi hai, Exident ho jaye iske pahale ghar pahunch jaate hai.
41 Sardar : Sitting on The Top of the Mountain and Studying.... When a
Person asked what he was doing.... He replied... Oye!! Higher
Studies
Yaar...!!!
42 Mayawati came to Lalu's House with a Goat.....
Lalu : Bhaiswa ko kyun Layi ho....??
Maya : Dikhta nahi, Goatwa hai..??
Lalu : Hum Goatwa se hi Puch raha Hun..!!
43 Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.
44 Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born
45 Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the
field"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladies first.
46 Customer: If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Delhi in two days time?
Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Mumbai.
47 1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!
2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor.
1st thief : Hurry! this is no time for superstitions
48 Man before Marriage I like Airtel....”Aisi Azaadi Aur Kahaan”
After Marriage He's Like Hutch... " Where R U Go Our Network
Follows."
49 Santa : That Cow is a Lovely Colour ,
Farmer : Yes, it's a Jersey.
Santa : Oh, I Thought it was its Skin...!!!
gaya... aur main...SWARGWASI. ..
50 They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense
51 It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as
women..and then he turns them into Wives !?!!!?!
52 It takes thousand workers to build a castle , Million soldiers to
protect a country BUT Just ONE woman to make a Happy HOME! Let's Thank ......KAAMWALI
53 After Finishing MBBS, Dr. Munna Starts his practice. He Chcked 1st
patient eyes, tongue & ears by Torch
& finally said BOLE TO.......... TORCH THEEEEK HAI
54 What is the difference between a woman and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side!
55 Ladka: Janeman is dil mein aaja.
Ladki: Sandal nikalu kya?
Ladka: Pagli mandir thodi hi hai, aise hi aaja!!
56 It's funny when people discuss LOVE MARRIAGE vs ARRANGED.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered
57 A person who surrenders when he's WRONG, is HONEST.
A person who SURRENDERS when not SURE, is WISE..
A person who surrenders even if he's RIGHT, is a HUSBAND.!
58 Mayawati came to Lallu's house with a goat.
Lallu: Bhaiswa ko kyon layi ho?
Maya: Dikhta nahin goatwa hai?
Lallu: Hum goatwa se hi to pooch raha hoon.
59 Do sardar jee motor cycle per bomb lay kar jarahay thay,
Rastay main speed breaker ki waja say jhatkay lag rahay thay,
Sardar jee ka dost bola yaar aaram say gari chalao kahi bomb na
phatjain,
Sardar jee...Oo tussi fiker hi naker assi kay pass dosra bhi tu bomb
hay. :)
60 aik sharabi raatkay waqat apnay dost kay sath jaraha hota hay. rastay
main talab per nazar parhti hay tu us main us ko chand dikhta hay woh
apny dost say
kahta hay yaar ye kia hay.dost kehta hay chand hay. sharabi hairan ho
ker
yaar hum log itnay upper aagaiy
61 Santa Singh goes to a TV shop and asks, 'Aap ke paas color TV hai
kya?'
'Haan' replies shopowner. Santa Singh says, 'Ek hara vala dena!'
62 A sardar calls another sardar on the phone & says "Hi, Main Bol Raha
Hoon".
The other sardar replies "Kamaal Hain,Ithe bhi Main Bol Raha Hoon!"
63 Ek pathan Cycle chalaty aur gungunaty howe kahin ja raha tha rasty
mein ek Aurat se takra betha.
Aurat chilla kar boli "Break nahi maar sakty thy kia ??? "
Pathan herat se... "Pora cycle mar deya abhi break mar kar kia faida."
64 Burhiya:Aray dekho iss kambakhat maare ko mere sath larki ja rahi he
osse nahi dekh raha kab se mujhe taare chala ja ria he...!
65 Aadmi:Aray.. ! amma darasal ye kabaria he purana maal dekh raha he.
66 Ustaad: Bete, aap jab hanste hen to aap ke dimples parte hen aap bohat
ache lagte hen dil chahta he aap ko piyar karloon.
67 Bacha: Sir, mujhse ziyada dimple to mere ammi ke parte hen.
68 <o:p>Aik lerki apny boy friend k sath nai garri main long drive par
ja rahi thi
achanak larki kehnay lagi.....suno !
kia tum aik haath se garri chala saktay ho ?
kioon nahi.....larkay ne bare fakher se garden akraaii...
larki ne aahista se kaha........ ..
"to phir doosray haath se apni naak saaf kar lo "
69 Sardar : Apne bete se bola, Bevakuf...kaisa machis leke aaya hai, ek
bhi tili nahin jalti.
Beta : Kya baat karte ho papa, sab tili test karke laya hu.
70 Doctor : App ka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai?
Sardaar : Hoga, Jarur hoga; 25 saalse mera khoon jo pee rahi hai....
71 Nurse - "Mubarak ho.. Sardarji.. aap papa ban gaye.."
Sardarji - " Meri wife ko nahi bolna.. main usey SURPRISE doonga..!"
72 Hum Ney Un Ki Yaad Main Ro Ro Kar Matkey Bhar Diye
Wo Bewafa Aye Aur Naha Kar Chal Diye
73 Neend mujhey raat bhar aati hai kam ,
Shayad macharon ko bi mil gaya hai sanam
74 Tujh bin zindagi ka tasawar hi nehi hai ,
Tere sang ho zindagi aisa bi koi scene nehi hai
Iss dunya mein, tum he sab sey haseen ho
mein aur kahon jhot kitna, ke tum ko yaqeen ho
75 rooz khawab mein nazar aatey ho tum
kio mujhey neend mein bi daratay ho tum
76 kal raat machar ne kata mere chehre par,
dil mien junoon tha...aankhoon mien khoon tha,
uthaya ussay masal dene k liye par khayal aya,
kambakht mien apna hi khoon thA
77 hi u all
i hv one puppy 4 u
1puppy 4 ur friend
1 puppy for ur fri ke fri
u know why???
becuz....... .....
ajj hi meray dogi nay 10 puppies ko janam dia hai
78 Civic VTI jisai kehete ho wo gadi tumaree hai
Jisey nokia 6600 kehte ho wo cell tumhara hai
Jinhai tum aamon k baghat kehte ho woh baghain tumharee hain
Kaho ik di kaho ik din
Ager sab kuch ye mera hai to sab kuch dedo ik din
Gari apni mujhe tum dedo cell dedo doosrey din
merey hathon mai kaghzat rakh ker dafa ho ik din
Dafa ho ik din dafa ho ik din...
79 dabe mein daba dabe mein kharghosh,
uncle nae ankh mari anute behosh...... :)
80 teen dost tha phalla patan dosra panjabe or tisra memon.Ramzan ka
maina tha dostoo na bolaa ka yar zakat dana ha too app log kasa datta ho.too phala dost patan na bolla ka hum khali maidan ma za kar gol paira banatha ha or asman ma paisa ushal tha ha zoo paisa paira ka bhair zata ha woo zakat kartta ha or zoo andar hotta ha woo humara hotta ha .fer pajabe na bolla ka hum ak lakir kachtta ha or paisa ushal tha ha zoo paisa left hand par zatta ha woo zakat kartta ha or zoo right hand par woo humara.fer memon dost sa pucha ka woo kasa kartta ha too usna kaha ka astag feroollha app log assa zakat kartta ho yea lakir fakir keya ha
hum khali maidan ma zatta ha or asman ma husal tha ha zoo paisa asman ma gheya woo zakat ka or zoo paisa necha aaya woo humara.
81 Admi Naai Se Meri TERE NAAM Wali Cutting Kar Do.
Naai Uski Tind Kar Deta Hai
Admi Ghussay Se Ye Kya Kiya Hai ???
Naai Main Kya Karoon Main Ne Dekhi Hi End Se Hai.
82 Sardarji is in Delhi. He is walking on a street which has Clock Tower
when someone asks him if he wants to buy the clock on the Tower.
Sardarji says "Yes".
"Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The man took the
thousand and disappeared. Having waited for several hours the Sardarji
figured he was taken for a ride. On the next day the Sardarji is again
walking along the same street and the same man asks him to buy the
clock. "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder."
The Sardarji gives him the thousand and says "I am not a fool.This
time, you wait and I'll go get a ladder."
83 A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he
feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The
lawyer turns around.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?"
"I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm
waiting in line."
"Well, I'm a lawyer, but you don't see me screwing the guy in front
of me, do you?"
84 Q: Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers?
A: He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren't met.
85 Safed saari par jab tum laalbindi lagati ho
khuda ki kasam ambulance nazar aati ho
farq sirf itna hai ke wo ghayal ko le jati hai
or tum ghayal kar jati ho
86 janab patan: eak dookan per jata hai aor kata hai40 wala chawal hai.
dukan daar: je hai
janab patan:eak kulo dado
dukan daar: je janab
janab patan : 40 wala chawal kitna ka diya hai.
87 Aik haseen-o-jameel adaakara ke ghar aag lag gaee ..aag par qabu panay
main 10 minut lagay.....aor. ......aag bujhany walon per qabu panay
main
40 minut lagay
88 Aik aadmi apne dost ki qabar par phool daal raha hota he
Aur brabar men bhi aik aadmi apne dost ki qabar par chawal daal raha
hota he.
Pehla Aadmi doosre se kehta he " Ye tumhara dost phool sunghne kab
uthe ga?"
Doosra dost:"Jab tumhara dost chawal khane uthe ga
89 uncle aik bachay se kehte hain : beta aik acha sa jhoot bolo agar
mujhe pasand agaya to main tumhien paanch rupay doon ga
bacha masoomiat se : yeh lo ! abhi to das rupay kahay thay .... !!!!
90 aik dost dosray se : yaar har party mien tum yehi kurta kyun pehantay
ho dosra dost : kyun ke yeh mera khandani kurta hai mere par dada ne
pehna phir dada ne pehna phir mere walid ne pehna iss liye main bhi pehanta hoon
pehla dost : ohh acha .. khier yeh batao k tumhari umar hogai hai
shadi ki tum kartay kyun nahi ..kya koi larki pasand nahi ati
dosra dost : nahi yaar larkiyaan to bohat pasand ati hain
pehla dost : to phir kyun nahi kartay
dosra dost : yaar mere par dada ne nahi ki dada ne nahi ki mere walid
ne nahi ki to phir main kaise karloon ??
91 Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway
station ticket counter with two men ahead of him.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' demanded the man in front.
He was given a ticket. 'Ek Punjab Mail dena.'
the second man asked & was handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh, 'Ek Punjab female dena!'
'What do u mean by Punjab female?' asked the clerk.
'It is for my wife' replied Banta Singh
92 The Equation:
7 Glance = 1 Smile
7 Smile = 1 Meeting
7 Meeting = 1 Kiss
7 Kisses = 1 Proposal
7 Proposal = 1 Marriage -
And that 1 Bloody marriage has 777777777777 problems.
So beware of glance!
93 Plan For Future:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Ram: I want 2 b a pilot.
Vinod: I want 2 b a doctor.
Deepa: I want 2 b a good mother.
Ravi: I want 2 help Deepa.
94 Exams:
Exams are like GIRL FRIENDS;
1,Too Many Questions.
2,Difficult to Understand.
3,More Explanation is Needed.
4,Result is always FAIL!
95 A man is dying of Cancer.
His son asked him, "Dad, why do u keep telling people u're dying of
AIDS?"
Answer: "So when I'm dead no one will dare touch ur mom
96 Girlfriend : And are you sure you love me and no one else
Boyfriend : Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.
97 Teacher : Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?
Pupil : The moon.
Teacher : Why?
Pupil : The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we dont need it.
98 Teacher : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
Pupil : A teacher.
99 Waiter : Would you like your coffee black?
Customer : What other colours do you have?
100 My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.
101 Teacher : Sam, you talk a lot.
Sam : It's a family tradition.
Teacher : What do you mean?
Sam : Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher.
Teacher : What about your mother?
Sam : She's a woman.
102 Tom : How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?
David: You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated.
103 Teacher : Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
Student : Brotherly love.
104 Teacher : Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
Sam : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
105 Patient : What are the chances of my recovering doctor?
Doctor : One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have.
Yours is the tenth case I've treated.The others all died.
106 Teacher : " Hello boys, Remember !!! Nothing is impossible."
One of the 20 Students: "Ok Sir, You please take out all the toothpaste and put it back into the tube again.
107 Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE ?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the sameday, sametime."
108 Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the road....why ?
Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office
109 A woman had 8 sons all named Kevin. On asking how she managed to call one in particular
She replied: That's easy. I call them by their surname !
110 koi apni biwi ka antim sanskar karke ghar ja raha tha ki achanak bijli
chamki, badal garje, jor se baarish shuru hui dukhi aadmi bola:
Lagta hai pahunch gai :-)
111 Sardar enters kitchen and opens the sugarbox. Sees inside and closes it. Wife observes the whole episode Again he comes and does the same stuff. Wife askes Why are you doing this?
Sardar replies: Doc told to check sugar level regularly
112 What is the full form of singh: S-sardar I-insaan N-nahi G-gadha H-hai.
113 Angry sardar-Oye mein is duniya ko mita dunga - mita dunga- mita dunga. Another sardar standing besides said mein tujhe rubber nahi dunga.
114 Santa singh: Can u spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Banta singh: Post office.
115 Sardar on cycle hit lady accidently, lady says," break nahi mar sakta tha kya?
Sardar replies "break ka kya hai, poori cycle to mar di....."
116 Sardarji zebra crossing ke black & white patte par bar bar idhar-udhar chalte the, woh kya soch rahe honge....think. ......... ...
"SALA YE PIANO BAJTA KYO NAHI"
117 Sardar:Aap kitna padhe ho?
Friend: B.A.
Sardar: kamal karte ho yaar sirf do word padhe aur woh bhi ulte.
118 A friend asks sardar how was ur exam?
Sardar: It was ok but i couldnt answer past tense of THINK. I thought, thought & finally i wrote 'THUNK'.
119 Sardar: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunaideti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt.
120 Sardar jhad pe bethkar gaa rahe the, achanak ek sardar jhad se ulta latak ke gaane laga, dusre ne pucha ki ulta kyon latka he, Sardar bola oye side B gaa raha hun.
121 Sardarni asks her lover,"Santa dear, if we get engaged, will u give me a ring?"
"Sure" replies santa. "Whats ur phone no?"
122 Sardarji is not sleeping with his wife! these days because somebody had told him that it is wrong to sleep with married women.
123 One day sardarji was sitting in his office on the thirteenth floor of a
building when a man came running in to his office and shouted "Santa singh your daughter Preeto just died in an accident" ....... since Sardarji was in panic. Not knowing what to do he jumped from his office window while comming down when he was near the tenth floor he remembered he didn't have a daughter named Preeto. when he was near the fifth floor he remembered he was not married.
124 *** Banta Singh finished his English exam and came out.
His friends asked him how did he do his exam, for that he replied "Exam was
okay, but for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought, thought ... and
at last wrote - THUNK !!!"
125 a sardar was going on the road.Then he sees a man who has met with an accident.so he picks him up puts him in his car and takes him to the hospital.Then the sardar realises that the man should have brought by ambulance.so he takes him back where he picked him
sardar was driving a car. Suddenly one tyre was puncher.he took spear tyre and changed in the place of punchered tyre. but unfortunately he misplaced the four screws to fit the tyre on its place . he was so confused ,,now what to do,, a pagal(mentally retaired) person was watching this incident.
He came near to sardar and said," do one thing,, take each one screw from the remaining three tyre and fit it in this new tyre.There after u can go where ever u want to. Sardar was so happy and said aree yaar Duniya tume pagal kahate hai lakin i dont think u are a pagal. pagal replied sir,, i m a pagal but i m not a sardar.
126 Once a Sardar ji rescued 6 people from a house burning on fire;
But still the Sardar ji was jailed, why?
Because all the rescued persons were fire fighters
127 TEACHER: Why are you late?
L-JOHNY: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
L-JOHNY: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
128 TEACHER: Johny, why are you doing your maths sums on the floor?
L-JOHNY: You told me to do it without using tables!
129 TEACHER: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"?
L-JOHNY: "K-R-O-K-O-D- A-I-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
L-JOHNY: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
130 TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
L-JOHNY: "HIJKLMNO"!!
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
L-JOHNY: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
TEACHER: Johny, why are you doing your maths sums on the floor?
L-JOHNY: You told me to do it without using tables!
131 TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now, Johny, who discovered America?
JOHNY: George!
132 TEACHER: Johny, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
L-JOHNY: Me!
133 TEACHER: Johny, why do you always get so dirty?
L-JOHNY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you are.
134 L-JOHNY: Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER: I think so. What do you want me To write?
L-JOHNY: Your name on this report card.
135 TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
L-JOHNY: Don't bite any.
136 TEACHER: Johny, give me a sentence starting with "I".
L-JOHNY: I is...
TEACHER: No, Johny. Always say, "I am."
L-JOHNY: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
137 Teacher: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE? "
L-Johnny : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the sameday
sametime."
138 Question: There are 10 elephants swimming in a pond. A boy jumps inside and swims underneath them and counts the number of legs.
There are only 36 legs.HOW??
Answer: One elephant was swimming BACKSTROKE!!
139 L-Johnny : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
Father : No. Why do you ask that?
L-Johnny : Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?
140 Teacher : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is
green and one is blue with red spots!
L-Johnny: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair of the same
at home.
141 Teacher: Now, Johny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
eating?
L-Johnny : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
142 Teacher: Johny, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his?
L-Johnny: No, teacher, it's the same dog!
ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From India, Bangalore
1 A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after
Every 10 sec a
woman gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.
2 Sardar-why r all these people running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r
others running?
3 Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence
into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".
4 Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He was
not sure as to what to be filled in column "Salary
Expected".
After much thought he wrote: Yes!
5 Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants. Servant
it’s already raining. Sardar: So what? Take an
umbrella and go.
6 Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket. Dealer
gave 11cr after
deducting tax. Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 cr or else
return my 20 Rs
back.
7 Postman:- I Have To Come 5 Miles To Deliver U This Packet
Sardar:- why did u come so far. Instead u could have
posted it....
8 Sardar's wish :when i die,i wana die like my grandpa who died
peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all the
passengers in the
car he was driving..
9 Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible
looking thing is
what you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!
10 Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: "I'm writing to my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.
11 Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab . Local
sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still
digging for more..
12 A man asked sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes walking at evening not
in the morning. Sardarji replied "Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM".
13 Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Darling : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Darling : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem Can there be greater than this one?
14 Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles
and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or
troubles.
Girl: Well that is because we aren't married yet.
15 Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to
give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.
16 A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if
my father hadn't left me a fortune?" "Honey," the woman replied Sweetly,
"I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"
17 Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
18 A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..
My Father grows beans," said one student. "My father cooks beans," said
another.
Then little Johnny spoke up: "We are all human beans."
19 Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire? "
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman.
Interviewer: "What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"
20 Its funny when people discuss over "love marriage" and "arranged marriage"
It is like asking a person if he would like to "hang himself" or "shoot himself".
21 What is a girl friend?
Addition of problems, subtraction of money, multiplication of enemies & division of friends.
22 Guide: "I welcome you all to Niagara Falls. These are the world's largest
waterfalls and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high, even 20
supersonic planes passing by can't be heard.
Now may I request the ladies to keep quite so that we can hear the Niagara
Falls?"
23 Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist.
If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for seven years.
The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board overlooking an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.
The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.
Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.
The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump.
"Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor.
To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can't swim!"
24 As a old man was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.
Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him,
"Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!"
"It's not just one car," said Herman, "It's hundreds of them!"
25 Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
26 What's the definition of lawyer?
The larval form of a politician
27 Sardar comes back 2 his car & finds a note saying "Parking Fine"
28 How do you recognize a Sardar in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.
29 once a Sardhar was walking and had a glove on one hand and not on other so the man asked him why did he do so. He Replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot.
30 Sardarji bought a brand new Maruti and decided to drive down from Amritsar, where he lived, to Jalandar to meet his friend. He reached there in a few hours.
After spending a few days there, he decided to return, and called up his mother to expect him in the evening. But he didn't reach in the evening and not the next day either. "
When he finally reached home on the third day, his distraught mother ran and asked him " Arre Puttar, ki hoya?
(What Happened, My Son?)
31 The Sardarji got out, obviously very tired from a long journey, and said, "Oy, ye Marutti wale pagal hain, agge jaane waaste chaar gear banaate hain, )
aur pichche jaane waaste sirf ik?" (These Maruti Car people are crazy! They have four gears for going forward, but only one for going back!
32 Santa Singh decided to start a chicken farm so he bought a hundred chickens to begin with. A month later he returned to the dealer for another hundred chickens .
because all of the first lot had died. A month later he was back at t he dealer for another hundred chickens for the second lot had also died
'But I think I know where I'm going wrong,' said Santa, 'I think I'm planting them too deep.'
33 2 Dost Suicide karne gae, Pahala : "Hey Bhagwan muje dunia ki saari
nafrat de Pareshani de Duk de!" Dusra dost : "Abe tu maut maang raha
hai ki Reliance mai Job.
34 Q - What is the Difference Between Mother & Wife ?
A - One Woman Brings U into this world crying... & the other
ensures U Continue to do so.
35 Sardar to Shopkeeper: - Mujhe India Ka Flag Dikhao, Shopkeeper ne
Flag Dikhaya, Sardar: - Isme aur Colour Dikhao.
36 .How can a Sardar Kill a Lion ? Sardarji thinks N thinks hard &
comes to a conclusion: I'll drink poison n let lion eat me. O' bolo
ta ra ra.
37 A Chinese pair accidentally had twins without getting married, Guess
what they named them... Jo Hua, So Hua.
38 Wife : Honey ...... What are You Looking for ?
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : Nothing...?? U've been reading our marriage certificate 4 an
hour ...?? Husband : I was just looking 4 the expiry date.
39 Papa : beta har parai stri ko apni Maa samjho to tumhara character
thik ho jaaega.....Beta : Lekin Papa fir Aap ke character ka kya
hoga....???
40 Sardar: O Banno Car ki speed itani ky badha di..? biwi: Oji Car ki
break fail ho gayi hai, Exident ho jaye iske pahale ghar pahunch jaate hai.
41 Sardar : Sitting on The Top of the Mountain and Studying.... When a
Person asked what he was doing.... He replied... Oye!! Higher
Studies
Yaar...!!!
42 Mayawati came to Lalu's House with a Goat.....
Lalu : Bhaiswa ko kyun Layi ho....??
Maya : Dikhta nahi, Goatwa hai..??
Lalu : Hum Goatwa se hi Puch raha Hun..!!
43 Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.
44 Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born
45 Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the
field"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladies first.
46 Customer: If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Delhi in two days time?
Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Mumbai.
47 1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!
2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor.
1st thief : Hurry! this is no time for superstitions
48 Man before Marriage I like Airtel....”Aisi Azaadi Aur Kahaan”
After Marriage He's Like Hutch... " Where R U Go Our Network
Follows."
49 Santa : That Cow is a Lovely Colour ,
Farmer : Yes, it's a Jersey.
Santa : Oh, I Thought it was its Skin...!!!
gaya... aur main...SWARGWASI. ..
50 They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense
51 It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as
women..and then he turns them into Wives !?!!!?!
52 It takes thousand workers to build a castle , Million soldiers to
protect a country BUT Just ONE woman to make a Happy HOME! Let's Thank ......KAAMWALI
53 After Finishing MBBS, Dr. Munna Starts his practice. He Chcked 1st
patient eyes, tongue & ears by Torch
& finally said BOLE TO.......... TORCH THEEEEK HAI
54 What is the difference between a woman and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side!
55 Ladka: Janeman is dil mein aaja.
Ladki: Sandal nikalu kya?
Ladka: Pagli mandir thodi hi hai, aise hi aaja!!
56 It's funny when people discuss LOVE MARRIAGE vs ARRANGED.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered
57 A person who surrenders when he's WRONG, is HONEST.
A person who SURRENDERS when not SURE, is WISE..
A person who surrenders even if he's RIGHT, is a HUSBAND.!
58 Mayawati came to Lallu's house with a goat.
Lallu: Bhaiswa ko kyon layi ho?
Maya: Dikhta nahin goatwa hai?
Lallu: Hum goatwa se hi to pooch raha hoon.
59 Do sardar jee motor cycle per bomb lay kar jarahay thay,
Rastay main speed breaker ki waja say jhatkay lag rahay thay,
Sardar jee ka dost bola yaar aaram say gari chalao kahi bomb na
phatjain,
Sardar jee...Oo tussi fiker hi naker assi kay pass dosra bhi tu bomb
hay. :)
60 aik sharabi raatkay waqat apnay dost kay sath jaraha hota hay. rastay
main talab per nazar parhti hay tu us main us ko chand dikhta hay woh
apny dost say
kahta hay yaar ye kia hay.dost kehta hay chand hay. sharabi hairan ho
ker
yaar hum log itnay upper aagaiy
61 Santa Singh goes to a TV shop and asks, 'Aap ke paas color TV hai
kya?'
'Haan' replies shopowner. Santa Singh says, 'Ek hara vala dena!'
62 A sardar calls another sardar on the phone & says "Hi, Main Bol Raha
Hoon".
The other sardar replies "Kamaal Hain,Ithe bhi Main Bol Raha Hoon!"
63 Ek pathan Cycle chalaty aur gungunaty howe kahin ja raha tha rasty
mein ek Aurat se takra betha.
Aurat chilla kar boli "Break nahi maar sakty thy kia ??? "
Pathan herat se... "Pora cycle mar deya abhi break mar kar kia faida."
64 Burhiya:Aray dekho iss kambakhat maare ko mere sath larki ja rahi he
osse nahi dekh raha kab se mujhe taare chala ja ria he...!
65 Aadmi:Aray.. ! amma darasal ye kabaria he purana maal dekh raha he.
66 Ustaad: Bete, aap jab hanste hen to aap ke dimples parte hen aap bohat
ache lagte hen dil chahta he aap ko piyar karloon.
67 Bacha: Sir, mujhse ziyada dimple to mere ammi ke parte hen.
68 <o:p>Aik lerki apny boy friend k sath nai garri main long drive par
ja rahi thi
achanak larki kehnay lagi.....suno !
kia tum aik haath se garri chala saktay ho ?
kioon nahi.....larkay ne bare fakher se garden akraaii...
larki ne aahista se kaha........ ..
"to phir doosray haath se apni naak saaf kar lo "
69 Sardar : Apne bete se bola, Bevakuf...kaisa machis leke aaya hai, ek
bhi tili nahin jalti.
Beta : Kya baat karte ho papa, sab tili test karke laya hu.
70 Doctor : App ka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai?
Sardaar : Hoga, Jarur hoga; 25 saalse mera khoon jo pee rahi hai....
71 Nurse - "Mubarak ho.. Sardarji.. aap papa ban gaye.."
Sardarji - " Meri wife ko nahi bolna.. main usey SURPRISE doonga..!"
72 Hum Ney Un Ki Yaad Main Ro Ro Kar Matkey Bhar Diye
Wo Bewafa Aye Aur Naha Kar Chal Diye
73 Neend mujhey raat bhar aati hai kam ,
Shayad macharon ko bi mil gaya hai sanam
74 Tujh bin zindagi ka tasawar hi nehi hai ,
Tere sang ho zindagi aisa bi koi scene nehi hai
Iss dunya mein, tum he sab sey haseen ho
mein aur kahon jhot kitna, ke tum ko yaqeen ho
75 rooz khawab mein nazar aatey ho tum
kio mujhey neend mein bi daratay ho tum
76 kal raat machar ne kata mere chehre par,
dil mien junoon tha...aankhoon mien khoon tha,
uthaya ussay masal dene k liye par khayal aya,
kambakht mien apna hi khoon thA
77 hi u all
i hv one puppy 4 u
1puppy 4 ur friend
1 puppy for ur fri ke fri
u know why???
becuz....... .....
ajj hi meray dogi nay 10 puppies ko janam dia hai
78 Civic VTI jisai kehete ho wo gadi tumaree hai
Jisey nokia 6600 kehte ho wo cell tumhara hai
Jinhai tum aamon k baghat kehte ho woh baghain tumharee hain
Kaho ik di kaho ik din
Ager sab kuch ye mera hai to sab kuch dedo ik din
Gari apni mujhe tum dedo cell dedo doosrey din
merey hathon mai kaghzat rakh ker dafa ho ik din
Dafa ho ik din dafa ho ik din...
79 dabe mein daba dabe mein kharghosh,
uncle nae ankh mari anute behosh...... :)
80 teen dost tha phalla patan dosra panjabe or tisra memon.Ramzan ka
maina tha dostoo na bolaa ka yar zakat dana ha too app log kasa datta ho.too phala dost patan na bolla ka hum khali maidan ma za kar gol paira banatha ha or asman ma paisa ushal tha ha zoo paisa paira ka bhair zata ha woo zakat kartta ha or zoo andar hotta ha woo humara hotta ha .fer pajabe na bolla ka hum ak lakir kachtta ha or paisa ushal tha ha zoo paisa left hand par zatta ha woo zakat kartta ha or zoo right hand par woo humara.fer memon dost sa pucha ka woo kasa kartta ha too usna kaha ka astag feroollha app log assa zakat kartta ho yea lakir fakir keya ha
hum khali maidan ma zatta ha or asman ma husal tha ha zoo paisa asman ma gheya woo zakat ka or zoo paisa necha aaya woo humara.
81 Admi Naai Se Meri TERE NAAM Wali Cutting Kar Do.
Naai Uski Tind Kar Deta Hai
Admi Ghussay Se Ye Kya Kiya Hai ???
Naai Main Kya Karoon Main Ne Dekhi Hi End Se Hai.
82 Sardarji is in Delhi. He is walking on a street which has Clock Tower
when someone asks him if he wants to buy the clock on the Tower.
Sardarji says "Yes".
"Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The man took the
thousand and disappeared. Having waited for several hours the Sardarji
figured he was taken for a ride. On the next day the Sardarji is again
walking along the same street and the same man asks him to buy the
clock. "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder."
The Sardarji gives him the thousand and says "I am not a fool.This
time, you wait and I'll go get a ladder."
83 A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he
feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The
lawyer turns around.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?"
"I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm
waiting in line."
"Well, I'm a lawyer, but you don't see me screwing the guy in front
of me, do you?"
84 Q: Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers?
A: He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren't met.
85 Safed saari par jab tum laalbindi lagati ho
khuda ki kasam ambulance nazar aati ho
farq sirf itna hai ke wo ghayal ko le jati hai
or tum ghayal kar jati ho
86 janab patan: eak dookan per jata hai aor kata hai40 wala chawal hai.
dukan daar: je hai
janab patan:eak kulo dado
dukan daar: je janab
janab patan : 40 wala chawal kitna ka diya hai.
87 Aik haseen-o-jameel adaakara ke ghar aag lag gaee ..aag par qabu panay
main 10 minut lagay.....aor. ......aag bujhany walon per qabu panay
main
40 minut lagay
88 Aik aadmi apne dost ki qabar par phool daal raha hota he
Aur brabar men bhi aik aadmi apne dost ki qabar par chawal daal raha
hota he.
Pehla Aadmi doosre se kehta he " Ye tumhara dost phool sunghne kab
uthe ga?"
Doosra dost:"Jab tumhara dost chawal khane uthe ga
89 uncle aik bachay se kehte hain : beta aik acha sa jhoot bolo agar
mujhe pasand agaya to main tumhien paanch rupay doon ga
bacha masoomiat se : yeh lo ! abhi to das rupay kahay thay .... !!!!
90 aik dost dosray se : yaar har party mien tum yehi kurta kyun pehantay
ho dosra dost : kyun ke yeh mera khandani kurta hai mere par dada ne
pehna phir dada ne pehna phir mere walid ne pehna iss liye main bhi pehanta hoon
pehla dost : ohh acha .. khier yeh batao k tumhari umar hogai hai
shadi ki tum kartay kyun nahi ..kya koi larki pasand nahi ati
dosra dost : nahi yaar larkiyaan to bohat pasand ati hain
pehla dost : to phir kyun nahi kartay
dosra dost : yaar mere par dada ne nahi ki dada ne nahi ki mere walid
ne nahi ki to phir main kaise karloon ??
91 Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway
station ticket counter with two men ahead of him.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' demanded the man in front.
He was given a ticket. 'Ek Punjab Mail dena.'
the second man asked & was handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh, 'Ek Punjab female dena!'
'What do u mean by Punjab female?' asked the clerk.
'It is for my wife' replied Banta Singh
92 The Equation:
7 Glance = 1 Smile
7 Smile = 1 Meeting
7 Meeting = 1 Kiss
7 Kisses = 1 Proposal
7 Proposal = 1 Marriage -
And that 1 Bloody marriage has 777777777777 problems.
So beware of glance!
93 Plan For Future:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Ram: I want 2 b a pilot.
Vinod: I want 2 b a doctor.
Deepa: I want 2 b a good mother.
Ravi: I want 2 help Deepa.
94 Exams:
Exams are like GIRL FRIENDS;
1,Too Many Questions.
2,Difficult to Understand.
3,More Explanation is Needed.
4,Result is always FAIL!
95 A man is dying of Cancer.
His son asked him, "Dad, why do u keep telling people u're dying of
AIDS?"
Answer: "So when I'm dead no one will dare touch ur mom
96 Girlfriend : And are you sure you love me and no one else
Boyfriend : Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.
97 Teacher : Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?
Pupil : The moon.
Teacher : Why?
Pupil : The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we dont need it.
98 Teacher : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
Pupil : A teacher.
99 Waiter : Would you like your coffee black?
Customer : What other colours do you have?
100 My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.
101 Teacher : Sam, you talk a lot.
Sam : It's a family tradition.
Teacher : What do you mean?
Sam : Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher.
Teacher : What about your mother?
Sam : She's a woman.
102 Tom : How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?
David: You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated.
103 Teacher : Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
Student : Brotherly love.
104 Teacher : Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
Sam : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
105 Patient : What are the chances of my recovering doctor?
Doctor : One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have.
Yours is the tenth case I've treated.The others all died.
106 Teacher : " Hello boys, Remember !!! Nothing is impossible."
One of the 20 Students: "Ok Sir, You please take out all the toothpaste and put it back into the tube again.
107 Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE ?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the sameday, sametime."
108 Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the road....why ?
Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office
109 A woman had 8 sons all named Kevin. On asking how she managed to call one in particular
She replied: That's easy. I call them by their surname !
110 koi apni biwi ka antim sanskar karke ghar ja raha tha ki achanak bijli
chamki, badal garje, jor se baarish shuru hui dukhi aadmi bola:
Lagta hai pahunch gai :-)
111 Sardar enters kitchen and opens the sugarbox. Sees inside and closes it. Wife observes the whole episode Again he comes and does the same stuff. Wife askes Why are you doing this?
Sardar replies: Doc told to check sugar level regularly
112 What is the full form of singh: S-sardar I-insaan N-nahi G-gadha H-hai.
113 Angry sardar-Oye mein is duniya ko mita dunga - mita dunga- mita dunga. Another sardar standing besides said mein tujhe rubber nahi dunga.
114 Santa singh: Can u spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Banta singh: Post office.
115 Sardar on cycle hit lady accidently, lady says," break nahi mar sakta tha kya?
Sardar replies "break ka kya hai, poori cycle to mar di....."
116 Sardarji zebra crossing ke black & white patte par bar bar idhar-udhar chalte the, woh kya soch rahe honge....think. ......... ...
"SALA YE PIANO BAJTA KYO NAHI"
117 Sardar:Aap kitna padhe ho?
Friend: B.A.
Sardar: kamal karte ho yaar sirf do word padhe aur woh bhi ulte.
118 A friend asks sardar how was ur exam?
Sardar: It was ok but i couldnt answer past tense of THINK. I thought, thought & finally i wrote 'THUNK'.
119 Sardar: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunaideti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt.
120 Sardar jhad pe bethkar gaa rahe the, achanak ek sardar jhad se ulta latak ke gaane laga, dusre ne pucha ki ulta kyon latka he, Sardar bola oye side B gaa raha hun.
121 Sardarni asks her lover,"Santa dear, if we get engaged, will u give me a ring?"
"Sure" replies santa. "Whats ur phone no?"
122 Sardarji is not sleeping with his wife! these days because somebody had told him that it is wrong to sleep with married women.
123 One day sardarji was sitting in his office on the thirteenth floor of a
building when a man came running in to his office and shouted "Santa singh your daughter Preeto just died in an accident" ....... since Sardarji was in panic. Not knowing what to do he jumped from his office window while comming down when he was near the tenth floor he remembered he didn't have a daughter named Preeto. when he was near the fifth floor he remembered he was not married.
124 *** Banta Singh finished his English exam and came out.
His friends asked him how did he do his exam, for that he replied "Exam was
okay, but for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought, thought ... and
at last wrote - THUNK !!!"
125 a sardar was going on the road.Then he sees a man who has met with an accident.so he picks him up puts him in his car and takes him to the hospital.Then the sardar realises that the man should have brought by ambulance.so he takes him back where he picked him
sardar was driving a car. Suddenly one tyre was puncher.he took spear tyre and changed in the place of punchered tyre. but unfortunately he misplaced the four screws to fit the tyre on its place . he was so confused ,,now what to do,, a pagal(mentally retaired) person was watching this incident.
He came near to sardar and said," do one thing,, take each one screw from the remaining three tyre and fit it in this new tyre.There after u can go where ever u want to. Sardar was so happy and said aree yaar Duniya tume pagal kahate hai lakin i dont think u are a pagal. pagal replied sir,, i m a pagal but i m not a sardar.
126 Once a Sardar ji rescued 6 people from a house burning on fire;
But still the Sardar ji was jailed, why?
Because all the rescued persons were fire fighters
127 TEACHER: Why are you late?
L-JOHNY: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
L-JOHNY: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
128 TEACHER: Johny, why are you doing your maths sums on the floor?
L-JOHNY: You told me to do it without using tables!
129 TEACHER: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"?
L-JOHNY: "K-R-O-K-O-D- A-I-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
L-JOHNY: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
130 TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
L-JOHNY: "HIJKLMNO"!!
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
L-JOHNY: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
TEACHER: Johny, why are you doing your maths sums on the floor?
L-JOHNY: You told me to do it without using tables!
131 TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now, Johny, who discovered America?
JOHNY: George!
132 TEACHER: Johny, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
L-JOHNY: Me!
133 TEACHER: Johny, why do you always get so dirty?
L-JOHNY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you are.
134 L-JOHNY: Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER: I think so. What do you want me To write?
L-JOHNY: Your name on this report card.
135 TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
L-JOHNY: Don't bite any.
136 TEACHER: Johny, give me a sentence starting with "I".
L-JOHNY: I is...
TEACHER: No, Johny. Always say, "I am."
L-JOHNY: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
137 Teacher: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE? "
L-Johnny : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the sameday
sametime."
138 Question: There are 10 elephants swimming in a pond. A boy jumps inside and swims underneath them and counts the number of legs.
There are only 36 legs.HOW??
Answer: One elephant was swimming BACKSTROKE!!
139 L-Johnny : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
Father : No. Why do you ask that?
L-Johnny : Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?
140 Teacher : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is
green and one is blue with red spots!
L-Johnny: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair of the same
at home.
141 Teacher: Now, Johny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
eating?
L-Johnny : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
142 Teacher: Johny, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his?
L-Johnny: No, teacher, it's the same dog!
ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From India, Bangalore
100 Wonderful SMS For U
1.Gham me hasne walo ko kabhi rulaya nahi jata,
lehro se pani ko hataya nahi jata,
hone wale ho jate hain khudhi dil se apne,
kisi ko kehkar apna banaya nahi jata
2.Socha tha na karenge kisi se dosti,
na karenge kisi se vaada,
par kya kare dost mila itna pyara ki karna pada dosti
ka vaada
3.Samja do apni yado ko,
wo bin bulaye pas aaya karti hai,
aap to dur rehkar satate ho magar,
wo pas aakar rulaya karti hai
4.Waqt guzarta raha par sanse thami si thi,
muskura rahe the hum,
par ankho me nami si thi,
saath hamare ye jahan tha sara,
par na jaane kyu tumhari kami si thi
5.Kyu dil ke mere tukde kar diye,
kyu mere aansu ko apni muskan se baha diye,
gunah kya tha mera bus chahna tumhe,
kyu meri zindagi me tune dard bhardiye
6.Phool se pehle khusboo ko to dekho,
karne se pehle kaam ko to dekho,
kisike roop mein diwana naa bano,
surat se pehle uske dil ko to dekho
7.Movie titles related to engg students:
exams - socha na tha,
classes - kabhi kabhi,
question papers - na tum jano na hum,
copying - yaarana,
maths2 - asambhav,
maths1 - mission impossible,
environmental sciences - pyar mein kabhi kabhi,
1st semester - kuch to hai,
2nd semester - yeh kya ho raha hai,
distinction - kal ho na ho,
1st class - raju bangaya gentleman,
2nd class - dil mange more
fail - phir milenge
7.Hum wo ishq hain jo dil bankar dhadakte hai,
hum wo khushbo hain jo baho mein mahakte hain,
humse pyar na karna e-zalim hum vo dard hain jo ankho
se chalakte hain
8.School- a place where papa pays & son plays
life insurance- a contract tht keeps you poor all ur
life so tht you can die rich
nurse- a person wakes up to give you sleeping pills
marriage- a contract in which a boy loses his
bachelors degree & girl gets her masters degree
9.Apne pyar ko chupana chaha par chupa na sake,
diwane dil pe kabu hum pa na sake,
aaj itne karib se gujar gaye wo,
phir bhi unka hath hum tham na sake
10.Ikrar may shabdo ki ahmiyat nai hoti,
dil ke jazbat ki awaz nai hoti,
ankhen bayan kar deti hai dil ki dastan,
mohabbat lafzo ki mohtaz nai hoti
11.Gam ki aahat na aaye tere dar par,
pyar ke samander ka tum bhi ek kinara ho,
bhool se jo tapke teri aankhon say moti,
thame wohi jo tumhe sabse pyara ho
12.Mohabbat me sath to harpal hota he,
koi dikhne se hota he to koi dilse hota hai,
maza to sath tab aye yaro,
jab judai ka lamha mahsus hota hai
13.Be slow in choosing a friend & slower while loosing
them bcoz friendship is not an opportunity its a
sweet rsponsibility
14.If love is sweet why does it hurt,
if love is deep why does it burn,
if love is warm why do we shiver,
if love is tender why do we cry,
if love is forever why do we die
15.God picked up a flower & dipped in honey he touched
it with love n turned into u,
he then gifted it to me & said this friend is for u
16.Na chaho kisi ko itna ki chahat aapki majburi ban
jaye,
chaho kisi ko itna aapka pyaar uske liye jaruri ban
jaye
17.Gham ne hasne na diya,
zamane ne rone na diya,
is uljhano ne jine na diya,
thak ke jab sitaron se panah li,
neend aayi tho aapki yaad ne sone na diya
18.Har ek se achi baat karna FITRAT hai hamari,
har ek khush rahe ye HASRAT hai hamari,
koi hum ko yaad kare ya na kare,
har ek ko yaad karna aadat hai hamari
19.Yaadon mein hum rahein ye ehsaas rakhna,
nazron se door sahi dil ke paas rakhna,
ye nahi kehte ke sath raho dur sahi par yaad rakhna
20.Fasle mita kar aapas me pyar rakhna,
dosti ka ye rishta hamesha yunhi barkarar rakhna,
bichad jaye kabhi aap se hum,
aankhon me hamesha hamara intejar rakhna
21.Hamne zindagi ki shurarat S se ki,
s se suraj, s se subah, s se swagat, s se saaz, s se
sangeet par phir s se samay ne aisi karwat badli ke
s se hamari shaadi ho gai, aur fir jeewan ka arth
saas, sasur, saala, saali, sasural or sankat ho gaya
to hamne s se sharab pi ne lage, so beaware of s
22.Zindagi mein hamesha SMART log milenge,
kahi zyada to kahi kum milenge,
choice zara sochke karna,
zaroori nahi har jagah tumhe hum jaise milenge
23.Sms karenge hum ek duje ko bari bari,
hame lagti hai ye rasam badi pyari,
ye sms milte hi ek sms bhej dena,
kyunki hame bilkul pasand nahi udhari
24.Kisi na kisi pe kisi ko aetbar ho jata hai,
ajnabi koi shaks yaar ho jata hai,
khubiyo se nahi hoti mohabbat bhi sadaa,
khamiyo se bhi aksar pyaar ho jata hai
25.Khuda se thoda rahem kharid lete,
aap ke zakhmo ka marhar kharid lete,
agar kahin kabhi bikti khushiyan meri,
to saari bechkar aapka har gam kharid lete
26.Sabse loving kaun: TUM,
sabse sweet kaun: TUM,
sabse cute kaun: TUM,
in sab me TUM se zyada kaun: HUM
lekin duniya me sabse acche dost kaun: HUM TUM
27.Nighahe nighago se milakar to dekho,
naye logo se rishta banakar to dekho,
hasrate dil me dabane se kya faida,
apne hoton ko hilakar to dekho,
asmaan simat jayega tumhare agosh me,
chahat ki bahen failakar to dekho
28.Frindship opens many doors each with a different
view but none could be more beautiful view
than the door that leads to u
29.Tum kya jano kya hai tanhai is tute hue patte se
pucho kya hai judai,
yu bewafa ka ilzam na de zalim,
is waqt se puch kis waqt teri yaad na aayi
30.Bathmeez
Chaddar ki KAMEEZ,
Lohe ka PAIJAMA,
Bandar tera MAMA,
Billi teri MAUSI,
Kutte mera YAAR,
Aam ka AACHAR
Miss u mere YAAR
31.Aap ka ashiyana dil mein basaya hai,
apki yado ko sine se lagaya hai,
pata nahi yaad apki hi kyo aati hai,
dost to hamne auro ko bhi banaya hai
32.Make a heart which never breaks,
make a smile which never hurts,
make a touch which never pains,
make a friendship which never ends
33.Dosti gazal hai gane ke liye,
dosti nagma hai sunane ke liye,
ye wo jazba hai jo sabko nahi milta,
kyonki aap jaisa chahiye nibhane ke liye
34.Zindagi hai nadan isiliye chup hoon,
dard hi dard subah shaam isiliye chup hoon,
keh du zamane se dastan apni,
usme aayega tera naam isiliye chup hoon
35.Hoth keh nahi sakte jo fasana dil ka,
shayad nazron se vo baat ho jaye,
is ummid se karte hain intezar raat ka,
ke shayad sapne me mulakat ho jaye
36.Sehmi si nigaho mein khwab hum jaga denge,
sooni in raho pe phool hum khila denge,
humare sang muskura ke to dekhiye,
hum aapke har gum bhula denge
37.Kaise kehde ki unse milne ki chahat nahi,
bekarar dil ko ab bhi rahat nahi,
bhula dete unhe bhi magar kya kare dost,
kisi ko bhulane ki is dil ko aadat nahi
38.Mana aaj unhe hamara koi khayal nahi,
jawab dene ko hum razi he par koi sawal nahi,
pucho unke dil se kya hum unke yaar nahi,
kya hamse milne ko wo bekarar nahi
39.Bolti hai dosti chup rehta hai pyar,
hasati hai dosti rulaata hai pyar,
milati hai dosti judaa karta hai pyar,
phir bhi kyun dosti chodkar log karte hai pyar
40.Aap to manzil ko mushkil samajte he hum aap ko
manzil samajte he,
bada fark he apke or hamare nazariye me
aap hume sapna or hum aap ko apna samajte hai
41.Wife: kaash main newspaper hoti dinbhar tumhare
hathon me rehti
Hus: meri bhi yahi dua hai rab se issi bahane her din
nayi nayi to milti
42.Leke hum dusro ki hasi kya kare,
jo apni nahi wo khushi kya kare,
tanha jine se behatar hai mar jaye hum,
jab saath tum nahi to zindagi jikar kya kare
43.Phool bankar muskurana zindagi hai,
muskurake gum bhulana zindagi hai,
milkar log khush hote hai to kya hua,
bina mile dosti nibhana bhi zindagi hai
44.Happy moments praise allah,
difficult moments seek allah,
quiet moments worship allah,
painful moments trust allah,
every moments thank allah
45.Ae khuda dua ye meri khali na jaye ke mere dost ki
palkon main kabhi aansu na aaye,
aansu nikle to khushi ke nikle gum ke aansu mere hisse
me aa jaye
46.Tumhari yaadon ki mehek in hawaon mein hai,
pyar hi pyar hi bikhra in fizao mein hai,
aisa na ho ki duriya dard ban jaye,
ab to aapke msg ka intezaar niaghon mein hai
47.Mohabbat ko mohabbat ka ishara yaad rehata hai,
har pyar ko apna pyar yaad rehta hai,
wo pal jo yaar ki baho me guzarta hai,
maut tak vo nazara yaad rehta hai
48.Panchi keh rahe hai ki hum chaman chod denge,
aur sitare keh rahe hai ki hum gagan chod denge,
agar tere ishq mein mai mar bhi jau ae sanam,
tum dilse pukar lena hum kafan chod denge
49.Aansu aa jate hain aankhon mein,
par labon pe hasi lani padti hai,
yeh mohabbat bhi kya cheez hai yaaro,
jisse karte ho usi se chupani padti hai
50.Kyun kisi ki khamoshi mujhe khamosh kar jaati hai,
kyun uski udaasi muje udaas kar jaati hai,
kya rishta hai uska mera jo mujhe uski yaad har pal aa
jaati hai
51.Jab koi khayal dilse takarata hai dil na chahkar
bhi khamosh reh jata hai,
koi sab kuch kehkar pyar jatata hai toh koi kuch na
kehkar bhi pyar nibhata hai
52.Reth pe likhna to adat hai hamari isiliye toh sagar
se dushmani hai hamari,
chahe wo lakh bar apka nam mitaye, apko bhulana taqdir
nahi hamari
53.Lamhe ye sunhere kal sath ho na ho,
kal me aaj jaisi baat ho na ho,
yaadon ke hasin lamhe dil me rehenge,
tamaam umar chahe mulaqat ho na ho
54.Mere alfazon ko juth mat samajna,
yaad aati hai bahut jaldi milne ki dua karna,
ji raha tha tumhare naam par mar jau toh bewafa mat
samajna
55.Lehar ati hai kinare se palat jati hai,
yad ati hai dil me simat jati hai,
faraq itna hai ki lehar bewaqt ati hai,
aur aap ki yaad har waqt ati hai
56.Rab se aapki khushi mangte hain,
duaon me aapki hansi mangte hain,
sochte hain kya mangen aapse chalo aapki umar bhar ki
dosti mangte hain
57.Nazre na hoti to nazara na hota,
duniya main hasino ka guzara na hota,
hamse yeh mat kaho ke dil lagana chhod de,
jaake khuda se kaho hasino ko banana chhod de
58.Best day aaj, best gift zindagi,
best eahsaas khushi,
best feeling pyar,
best relationship dosti,
best person hum,
best friend tum hum tum
59.Wo laut aayega teri zindagi mein,
jiska intzaar tujhe aaj bhi hai,
maana waqt ne ki hai bewafai tujhse lekin meri duaon
me asar aaj bhi hai
60.Ruthne ka haq aap rakhte hai manane ki chahat hum
rakhte hai,
aapke hoton pe muskurahat yu hi bani rahe yehi dua rab
se hum roz karte hai
61.Kiss is not like nokia just connecting people,
not like nike just do it,
not like pepsi yeh dil mange more,
but kiss is like lays no one can eat just one
62.Kaash dil ki awaaz me itna asar ho jaye ki hum jise
yaad kare use khabar ho jaye
rab se yahi dua hai meri ki aap jise chahe woh aap ka
humsafar ho jaye
63.Heart is like a crystal preserve it,
love is like a perfume spread it,
feelings are like flood flow it,
friendship is like umbrella come lets share it
64.Kafi hai husn dil ko behlane ke liye,
mohabbat karlo dil ko dukhane ke liye,
chahe bhale pade gam se vasta,
ek hum jaisa dost rakhna sab gamo ko bhulane ke liye
65.Anjane me hum apna dil gawa baithe is pyar me kaisa
dhoka kar baithe
unse kya gila kare bhool hamari hi hai jo bina dil
walon se dil laga baithe
66.Har khushi dil ke karib nahi hoti,
zindagi gamo se dur nahi hoti,
ae dost is dosti ko sanjokar rakhna,
aisi dosti har kisi ko nasib nahi hoti
67.Hum mitti ka aashiyana banate gaye,
bana bana kar unhe mitate gaye,
hume koi na apna bana saka,
hum har kisi ko apna banate gaye
68.Days r too busy,
hours r too fast,
sec r too few,
but there's always time for me to remember a nice
friend like u
69.Kaun hai jo manzil se door nahin,
kaun hai jo zindagi se majboor nahin,
gunaah to sabhi karte hain,
humari nazar mein to khuda bhi bekasoor nahin
70.Kab unki palkon se izhaar hoga,
dil ke kisi kone mein hamare liye pyar hoga,
guzar rahi hai raat unki yaad mein,
kabhi to unko bhi hamara intezar hoga
71.Nazroo se jab nazar ka takrar hota hai,
har mod par kissi ka intezaar hota hai,
dil rota hai zakham haste hai,
isi ka naam to pyaar hota hai
72.Unhone dekha aur aansu gir pade,
bhari basant mein jaise phool bikhar pade,
dukh woh nahin ki unhone hume alvida kaha,
dukh to ye he ki uske bad wo khud ro pade
73.Mana ye waqt hame yaad karne wala nahi,
par bewaqt he yaad karliya karo,
mana aapke aspas sari duniya hai,
kabhi hamari kamika bhi ehsas karliya karo
74.Nashili aankho se wo jab hamein dekhte hain,
hum ghabraakar ankhen jhuka leite hain,
kaun milaye unn ankhon se ankhen,
suna hai wo ankho se apna bana leite hai
75.Chandni raat main jab sara jahan sota hai kisi ki
yaad main koi badnaseeb rota hai,
khuda kisi ko pyar pe fida na kare aur kare to juda
nakare
76.Har pal muskurana zindagi hai,
muskurakar gam bhulana zindagi hai,
jeet kar muskurana bhi kya muskurana hai,
haar kar muskurana zindagi hai
77.Hum nibhayenge dosti marte dum tak,
hum hasayenge tumko gham se khushi tak,
aye dost kabhi humse naraz na hona,
saath rehna hamare akhiri dum tak
78.A child uses its thumb 2 chew,
an illiterate uses his thumb 2 sign,
a winner uses his thumb 2 show victory,
but a monkey is using his thumb 2 read this sms
79.Jab se tumhe jana hai,
jab se tumhe paaya hai,
har dua mein tera naam aaya hai,
taaki poochhu rab se ki yeh kaisa namoona banaya hai
80.Ret pe naam kabhi likhte nahi,
ret pe naam kabhi tikte nahi,
log kehte hai ki hum patthar dil hain,
lekin pattharo pe likhe naam kabhi mit te nahin
81.How can u tell the rain not 2 fall when clouds
exists,
how can u tell the leaves not 2 fall when the wind
exists,
how can u tell me not 2 miss when u exists
82.Aankhon me rahne walo ko yaad nahi karte,
dil me rehne walo ki baat nahi karte,
hamari to ruh me bus gaye hain aap,
tabhi to hum milne ki fariyaad nahi karte
83.Every tear is a sign of brokenness,
every silence is sign of lonliness,
every smile is sign of kindness,
every sms is sign of remembrance
84.To walk is easy but 2 walk alone is tough,
being missed by someone is nice but missing someone is
painful,
being loved is secure but to love is insecure
85.Some people have nice eyes,
some people have nice smiles,
others have nice faces, but u have all of them with a
nice heart
86.Phool bankar muskurana zindagi hai,
muskurake gum bhulana zindagi hai,
milkar log khush hote hai to kya hua,
bina mile dosti nibhana bhi zindagi hai
87.Tujse dosti karne ka hisab na aya,
mere kisi bhi sawal ka jawab na aya,
hum to jagte rahe tere hi khayalo me,
aur tujhe so kar bhi hamara khawab na aya
88.These are some of the romantic countries in the
world,
holland: hope our love lasts & never dies,
italy: i trust & love u,
libya: love is beautiful & u also,
france: friendship remains & never comes to an end
89.Jakham aisa diya ki koi dawa kaam na aayi,
aag aise lagayi ki paani se bhi bhuj na payi,
aaj bhi rote hai unki yaad main,
jinhe hamari yaad hamare guzar jane par bhi na aayi
90.Bhool jane ka hounsla na hua,
door rah kar bhi wo juda na hua,
unse mil kar kisi aur se kya milte,
koi dusra unke jaisa na hua
91.Laughter is the jam on the toast of life,
it adds flavour keeps it from being too dry & makes it
easier to swallow lifes sorrows
92.Kaanch chube to nishan reh jaata hai,
dil tute to armaan reh jaata hai,
laga to deta hai waqt marham is dil par,
phir bhi umra bhar ek zakhm reh jata hai
93.Log phoolon se mohabbat karte hai,
kaaton ko kisne yaad kiya,
hum kaaton se mohabbat karte hai,
kyunki phool ne hume barbaad kiya
94.Hum agar aapse mil nahi pate aisa nahin ke hamein
aap yaad nahi aate,
mana jahan ke sab rishte nibhaye nahi jate,
par jo bas jate hai dil me phir bhulae nahi jate
95.Nazar nawaz najaro me ji nahi lagta,
fiza gai to baharo me ji nahi lagta,
na puchh mujse tere gum me kya gujarti hai,
yahi kahunga hazaron me ji nahi lagta
96.Never search ur happiness in others which will make
u feel alone,
but search it in urself u will feel happy even if u
are left alone
97.Kafi hai husn ko behlane ke liye,
mohabbat karlo dil ko dukhane ke liye,
chahe bhale pade gam se vasta,
ek hum jaisa dost rakhna sab gamo ko bhulane ke liye
98.Fiza par asar hawaon ka hota hai,
mohabbat par asar adaon ka hota hai,
koi aisa hi kisi ka diwana nahi hota,
kuch kasoor to nigahon ka hota hai
99.Pyar ke ujalo me gum ka andhera kyu aata hai,
jisko hum chahte hai wohi kyu rulata hai,
mere khuda agar wo mera naseeb nahi to aise logon se
kyu milata hai
100.Waqt guzrega hum bikhar jayenge,
kaun jane ke hum kidhar jayenge,
hum apki parchayi hain yaad rakhna,
jahan tanhai mili wahan hum nazar ayenge
cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From India, Bangalore
1.Gham me hasne walo ko kabhi rulaya nahi jata,
lehro se pani ko hataya nahi jata,
hone wale ho jate hain khudhi dil se apne,
kisi ko kehkar apna banaya nahi jata
2.Socha tha na karenge kisi se dosti,
na karenge kisi se vaada,
par kya kare dost mila itna pyara ki karna pada dosti
ka vaada
3.Samja do apni yado ko,
wo bin bulaye pas aaya karti hai,
aap to dur rehkar satate ho magar,
wo pas aakar rulaya karti hai
4.Waqt guzarta raha par sanse thami si thi,
muskura rahe the hum,
par ankho me nami si thi,
saath hamare ye jahan tha sara,
par na jaane kyu tumhari kami si thi
5.Kyu dil ke mere tukde kar diye,
kyu mere aansu ko apni muskan se baha diye,
gunah kya tha mera bus chahna tumhe,
kyu meri zindagi me tune dard bhardiye
6.Phool se pehle khusboo ko to dekho,
karne se pehle kaam ko to dekho,
kisike roop mein diwana naa bano,
surat se pehle uske dil ko to dekho
7.Movie titles related to engg students:
exams - socha na tha,
classes - kabhi kabhi,
question papers - na tum jano na hum,
copying - yaarana,
maths2 - asambhav,
maths1 - mission impossible,
environmental sciences - pyar mein kabhi kabhi,
1st semester - kuch to hai,
2nd semester - yeh kya ho raha hai,
distinction - kal ho na ho,
1st class - raju bangaya gentleman,
2nd class - dil mange more
fail - phir milenge
7.Hum wo ishq hain jo dil bankar dhadakte hai,
hum wo khushbo hain jo baho mein mahakte hain,
humse pyar na karna e-zalim hum vo dard hain jo ankho
se chalakte hain
8.School- a place where papa pays & son plays
life insurance- a contract tht keeps you poor all ur
life so tht you can die rich
nurse- a person wakes up to give you sleeping pills
marriage- a contract in which a boy loses his
bachelors degree & girl gets her masters degree
9.Apne pyar ko chupana chaha par chupa na sake,
diwane dil pe kabu hum pa na sake,
aaj itne karib se gujar gaye wo,
phir bhi unka hath hum tham na sake
10.Ikrar may shabdo ki ahmiyat nai hoti,
dil ke jazbat ki awaz nai hoti,
ankhen bayan kar deti hai dil ki dastan,
mohabbat lafzo ki mohtaz nai hoti
11.Gam ki aahat na aaye tere dar par,
pyar ke samander ka tum bhi ek kinara ho,
bhool se jo tapke teri aankhon say moti,
thame wohi jo tumhe sabse pyara ho
12.Mohabbat me sath to harpal hota he,
koi dikhne se hota he to koi dilse hota hai,
maza to sath tab aye yaro,
jab judai ka lamha mahsus hota hai
13.Be slow in choosing a friend & slower while loosing
them bcoz friendship is not an opportunity its a
sweet rsponsibility
14.If love is sweet why does it hurt,
if love is deep why does it burn,
if love is warm why do we shiver,
if love is tender why do we cry,
if love is forever why do we die
15.God picked up a flower & dipped in honey he touched
it with love n turned into u,
he then gifted it to me & said this friend is for u
16.Na chaho kisi ko itna ki chahat aapki majburi ban
jaye,
chaho kisi ko itna aapka pyaar uske liye jaruri ban
jaye
17.Gham ne hasne na diya,
zamane ne rone na diya,
is uljhano ne jine na diya,
thak ke jab sitaron se panah li,
neend aayi tho aapki yaad ne sone na diya
18.Har ek se achi baat karna FITRAT hai hamari,
har ek khush rahe ye HASRAT hai hamari,
koi hum ko yaad kare ya na kare,
har ek ko yaad karna aadat hai hamari
19.Yaadon mein hum rahein ye ehsaas rakhna,
nazron se door sahi dil ke paas rakhna,
ye nahi kehte ke sath raho dur sahi par yaad rakhna
20.Fasle mita kar aapas me pyar rakhna,
dosti ka ye rishta hamesha yunhi barkarar rakhna,
bichad jaye kabhi aap se hum,
aankhon me hamesha hamara intejar rakhna
21.Hamne zindagi ki shurarat S se ki,
s se suraj, s se subah, s se swagat, s se saaz, s se
sangeet par phir s se samay ne aisi karwat badli ke
s se hamari shaadi ho gai, aur fir jeewan ka arth
saas, sasur, saala, saali, sasural or sankat ho gaya
to hamne s se sharab pi ne lage, so beaware of s
22.Zindagi mein hamesha SMART log milenge,
kahi zyada to kahi kum milenge,
choice zara sochke karna,
zaroori nahi har jagah tumhe hum jaise milenge
23.Sms karenge hum ek duje ko bari bari,
hame lagti hai ye rasam badi pyari,
ye sms milte hi ek sms bhej dena,
kyunki hame bilkul pasand nahi udhari
24.Kisi na kisi pe kisi ko aetbar ho jata hai,
ajnabi koi shaks yaar ho jata hai,
khubiyo se nahi hoti mohabbat bhi sadaa,
khamiyo se bhi aksar pyaar ho jata hai
25.Khuda se thoda rahem kharid lete,
aap ke zakhmo ka marhar kharid lete,
agar kahin kabhi bikti khushiyan meri,
to saari bechkar aapka har gam kharid lete
26.Sabse loving kaun: TUM,
sabse sweet kaun: TUM,
sabse cute kaun: TUM,
in sab me TUM se zyada kaun: HUM
lekin duniya me sabse acche dost kaun: HUM TUM
27.Nighahe nighago se milakar to dekho,
naye logo se rishta banakar to dekho,
hasrate dil me dabane se kya faida,
apne hoton ko hilakar to dekho,
asmaan simat jayega tumhare agosh me,
chahat ki bahen failakar to dekho
28.Frindship opens many doors each with a different
view but none could be more beautiful view
than the door that leads to u
29.Tum kya jano kya hai tanhai is tute hue patte se
pucho kya hai judai,
yu bewafa ka ilzam na de zalim,
is waqt se puch kis waqt teri yaad na aayi
30.Bathmeez
Chaddar ki KAMEEZ,
Lohe ka PAIJAMA,
Bandar tera MAMA,
Billi teri MAUSI,
Kutte mera YAAR,
Aam ka AACHAR
Miss u mere YAAR
31.Aap ka ashiyana dil mein basaya hai,
apki yado ko sine se lagaya hai,
pata nahi yaad apki hi kyo aati hai,
dost to hamne auro ko bhi banaya hai
32.Make a heart which never breaks,
make a smile which never hurts,
make a touch which never pains,
make a friendship which never ends
33.Dosti gazal hai gane ke liye,
dosti nagma hai sunane ke liye,
ye wo jazba hai jo sabko nahi milta,
kyonki aap jaisa chahiye nibhane ke liye
34.Zindagi hai nadan isiliye chup hoon,
dard hi dard subah shaam isiliye chup hoon,
keh du zamane se dastan apni,
usme aayega tera naam isiliye chup hoon
35.Hoth keh nahi sakte jo fasana dil ka,
shayad nazron se vo baat ho jaye,
is ummid se karte hain intezar raat ka,
ke shayad sapne me mulakat ho jaye
36.Sehmi si nigaho mein khwab hum jaga denge,
sooni in raho pe phool hum khila denge,
humare sang muskura ke to dekhiye,
hum aapke har gum bhula denge
37.Kaise kehde ki unse milne ki chahat nahi,
bekarar dil ko ab bhi rahat nahi,
bhula dete unhe bhi magar kya kare dost,
kisi ko bhulane ki is dil ko aadat nahi
38.Mana aaj unhe hamara koi khayal nahi,
jawab dene ko hum razi he par koi sawal nahi,
pucho unke dil se kya hum unke yaar nahi,
kya hamse milne ko wo bekarar nahi
39.Bolti hai dosti chup rehta hai pyar,
hasati hai dosti rulaata hai pyar,
milati hai dosti judaa karta hai pyar,
phir bhi kyun dosti chodkar log karte hai pyar
40.Aap to manzil ko mushkil samajte he hum aap ko
manzil samajte he,
bada fark he apke or hamare nazariye me
aap hume sapna or hum aap ko apna samajte hai
41.Wife: kaash main newspaper hoti dinbhar tumhare
hathon me rehti
Hus: meri bhi yahi dua hai rab se issi bahane her din
nayi nayi to milti
42.Leke hum dusro ki hasi kya kare,
jo apni nahi wo khushi kya kare,
tanha jine se behatar hai mar jaye hum,
jab saath tum nahi to zindagi jikar kya kare
43.Phool bankar muskurana zindagi hai,
muskurake gum bhulana zindagi hai,
milkar log khush hote hai to kya hua,
bina mile dosti nibhana bhi zindagi hai
44.Happy moments praise allah,
difficult moments seek allah,
quiet moments worship allah,
painful moments trust allah,
every moments thank allah
45.Ae khuda dua ye meri khali na jaye ke mere dost ki
palkon main kabhi aansu na aaye,
aansu nikle to khushi ke nikle gum ke aansu mere hisse
me aa jaye
46.Tumhari yaadon ki mehek in hawaon mein hai,
pyar hi pyar hi bikhra in fizao mein hai,
aisa na ho ki duriya dard ban jaye,
ab to aapke msg ka intezaar niaghon mein hai
47.Mohabbat ko mohabbat ka ishara yaad rehata hai,
har pyar ko apna pyar yaad rehta hai,
wo pal jo yaar ki baho me guzarta hai,
maut tak vo nazara yaad rehta hai
48.Panchi keh rahe hai ki hum chaman chod denge,
aur sitare keh rahe hai ki hum gagan chod denge,
agar tere ishq mein mai mar bhi jau ae sanam,
tum dilse pukar lena hum kafan chod denge
49.Aansu aa jate hain aankhon mein,
par labon pe hasi lani padti hai,
yeh mohabbat bhi kya cheez hai yaaro,
jisse karte ho usi se chupani padti hai
50.Kyun kisi ki khamoshi mujhe khamosh kar jaati hai,
kyun uski udaasi muje udaas kar jaati hai,
kya rishta hai uska mera jo mujhe uski yaad har pal aa
jaati hai
51.Jab koi khayal dilse takarata hai dil na chahkar
bhi khamosh reh jata hai,
koi sab kuch kehkar pyar jatata hai toh koi kuch na
kehkar bhi pyar nibhata hai
52.Reth pe likhna to adat hai hamari isiliye toh sagar
se dushmani hai hamari,
chahe wo lakh bar apka nam mitaye, apko bhulana taqdir
nahi hamari
53.Lamhe ye sunhere kal sath ho na ho,
kal me aaj jaisi baat ho na ho,
yaadon ke hasin lamhe dil me rehenge,
tamaam umar chahe mulaqat ho na ho
54.Mere alfazon ko juth mat samajna,
yaad aati hai bahut jaldi milne ki dua karna,
ji raha tha tumhare naam par mar jau toh bewafa mat
samajna
55.Lehar ati hai kinare se palat jati hai,
yad ati hai dil me simat jati hai,
faraq itna hai ki lehar bewaqt ati hai,
aur aap ki yaad har waqt ati hai
56.Rab se aapki khushi mangte hain,
duaon me aapki hansi mangte hain,
sochte hain kya mangen aapse chalo aapki umar bhar ki
dosti mangte hain
57.Nazre na hoti to nazara na hota,
duniya main hasino ka guzara na hota,
hamse yeh mat kaho ke dil lagana chhod de,
jaake khuda se kaho hasino ko banana chhod de
58.Best day aaj, best gift zindagi,
best eahsaas khushi,
best feeling pyar,
best relationship dosti,
best person hum,
best friend tum hum tum
59.Wo laut aayega teri zindagi mein,
jiska intzaar tujhe aaj bhi hai,
maana waqt ne ki hai bewafai tujhse lekin meri duaon
me asar aaj bhi hai
60.Ruthne ka haq aap rakhte hai manane ki chahat hum
rakhte hai,
aapke hoton pe muskurahat yu hi bani rahe yehi dua rab
se hum roz karte hai
61.Kiss is not like nokia just connecting people,
not like nike just do it,
not like pepsi yeh dil mange more,
but kiss is like lays no one can eat just one
62.Kaash dil ki awaaz me itna asar ho jaye ki hum jise
yaad kare use khabar ho jaye
rab se yahi dua hai meri ki aap jise chahe woh aap ka
humsafar ho jaye
63.Heart is like a crystal preserve it,
love is like a perfume spread it,
feelings are like flood flow it,
friendship is like umbrella come lets share it
64.Kafi hai husn dil ko behlane ke liye,
mohabbat karlo dil ko dukhane ke liye,
chahe bhale pade gam se vasta,
ek hum jaisa dost rakhna sab gamo ko bhulane ke liye
65.Anjane me hum apna dil gawa baithe is pyar me kaisa
dhoka kar baithe
unse kya gila kare bhool hamari hi hai jo bina dil
walon se dil laga baithe
66.Har khushi dil ke karib nahi hoti,
zindagi gamo se dur nahi hoti,
ae dost is dosti ko sanjokar rakhna,
aisi dosti har kisi ko nasib nahi hoti
67.Hum mitti ka aashiyana banate gaye,
bana bana kar unhe mitate gaye,
hume koi na apna bana saka,
hum har kisi ko apna banate gaye
68.Days r too busy,
hours r too fast,
sec r too few,
but there's always time for me to remember a nice
friend like u
69.Kaun hai jo manzil se door nahin,
kaun hai jo zindagi se majboor nahin,
gunaah to sabhi karte hain,
humari nazar mein to khuda bhi bekasoor nahin
70.Kab unki palkon se izhaar hoga,
dil ke kisi kone mein hamare liye pyar hoga,
guzar rahi hai raat unki yaad mein,
kabhi to unko bhi hamara intezar hoga
71.Nazroo se jab nazar ka takrar hota hai,
har mod par kissi ka intezaar hota hai,
dil rota hai zakham haste hai,
isi ka naam to pyaar hota hai
72.Unhone dekha aur aansu gir pade,
bhari basant mein jaise phool bikhar pade,
dukh woh nahin ki unhone hume alvida kaha,
dukh to ye he ki uske bad wo khud ro pade
73.Mana ye waqt hame yaad karne wala nahi,
par bewaqt he yaad karliya karo,
mana aapke aspas sari duniya hai,
kabhi hamari kamika bhi ehsas karliya karo
74.Nashili aankho se wo jab hamein dekhte hain,
hum ghabraakar ankhen jhuka leite hain,
kaun milaye unn ankhon se ankhen,
suna hai wo ankho se apna bana leite hai
75.Chandni raat main jab sara jahan sota hai kisi ki
yaad main koi badnaseeb rota hai,
khuda kisi ko pyar pe fida na kare aur kare to juda
nakare
76.Har pal muskurana zindagi hai,
muskurakar gam bhulana zindagi hai,
jeet kar muskurana bhi kya muskurana hai,
haar kar muskurana zindagi hai
77.Hum nibhayenge dosti marte dum tak,
hum hasayenge tumko gham se khushi tak,
aye dost kabhi humse naraz na hona,
saath rehna hamare akhiri dum tak
78.A child uses its thumb 2 chew,
an illiterate uses his thumb 2 sign,
a winner uses his thumb 2 show victory,
but a monkey is using his thumb 2 read this sms
79.Jab se tumhe jana hai,
jab se tumhe paaya hai,
har dua mein tera naam aaya hai,
taaki poochhu rab se ki yeh kaisa namoona banaya hai
80.Ret pe naam kabhi likhte nahi,
ret pe naam kabhi tikte nahi,
log kehte hai ki hum patthar dil hain,
lekin pattharo pe likhe naam kabhi mit te nahin
81.How can u tell the rain not 2 fall when clouds
exists,
how can u tell the leaves not 2 fall when the wind
exists,
how can u tell me not 2 miss when u exists
82.Aankhon me rahne walo ko yaad nahi karte,
dil me rehne walo ki baat nahi karte,
hamari to ruh me bus gaye hain aap,
tabhi to hum milne ki fariyaad nahi karte
83.Every tear is a sign of brokenness,
every silence is sign of lonliness,
every smile is sign of kindness,
every sms is sign of remembrance
84.To walk is easy but 2 walk alone is tough,
being missed by someone is nice but missing someone is
painful,
being loved is secure but to love is insecure
85.Some people have nice eyes,
some people have nice smiles,
others have nice faces, but u have all of them with a
nice heart
86.Phool bankar muskurana zindagi hai,
muskurake gum bhulana zindagi hai,
milkar log khush hote hai to kya hua,
bina mile dosti nibhana bhi zindagi hai
87.Tujse dosti karne ka hisab na aya,
mere kisi bhi sawal ka jawab na aya,
hum to jagte rahe tere hi khayalo me,
aur tujhe so kar bhi hamara khawab na aya
88.These are some of the romantic countries in the
world,
holland: hope our love lasts & never dies,
italy: i trust & love u,
libya: love is beautiful & u also,
france: friendship remains & never comes to an end
89.Jakham aisa diya ki koi dawa kaam na aayi,
aag aise lagayi ki paani se bhi bhuj na payi,
aaj bhi rote hai unki yaad main,
jinhe hamari yaad hamare guzar jane par bhi na aayi
90.Bhool jane ka hounsla na hua,
door rah kar bhi wo juda na hua,
unse mil kar kisi aur se kya milte,
koi dusra unke jaisa na hua
91.Laughter is the jam on the toast of life,
it adds flavour keeps it from being too dry & makes it
easier to swallow lifes sorrows
92.Kaanch chube to nishan reh jaata hai,
dil tute to armaan reh jaata hai,
laga to deta hai waqt marham is dil par,
phir bhi umra bhar ek zakhm reh jata hai
93.Log phoolon se mohabbat karte hai,
kaaton ko kisne yaad kiya,
hum kaaton se mohabbat karte hai,
kyunki phool ne hume barbaad kiya
94.Hum agar aapse mil nahi pate aisa nahin ke hamein
aap yaad nahi aate,
mana jahan ke sab rishte nibhaye nahi jate,
par jo bas jate hai dil me phir bhulae nahi jate
95.Nazar nawaz najaro me ji nahi lagta,
fiza gai to baharo me ji nahi lagta,
na puchh mujse tere gum me kya gujarti hai,
yahi kahunga hazaron me ji nahi lagta
96.Never search ur happiness in others which will make
u feel alone,
but search it in urself u will feel happy even if u
are left alone
97.Kafi hai husn ko behlane ke liye,
mohabbat karlo dil ko dukhane ke liye,
chahe bhale pade gam se vasta,
ek hum jaisa dost rakhna sab gamo ko bhulane ke liye
98.Fiza par asar hawaon ka hota hai,
mohabbat par asar adaon ka hota hai,
koi aisa hi kisi ka diwana nahi hota,
kuch kasoor to nigahon ka hota hai
99.Pyar ke ujalo me gum ka andhera kyu aata hai,
jisko hum chahte hai wohi kyu rulata hai,
mere khuda agar wo mera naseeb nahi to aise logon se
kyu milata hai
100.Waqt guzrega hum bikhar jayenge,
kaun jane ke hum kidhar jayenge,
hum apki parchayi hain yaad rakhna,
jahan tanhai mili wahan hum nazar ayenge
cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From India, Bangalore
Hello freinds,
Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1) Chale jaoge beshak merei zindagi se,
magar is dil se kis tarah jaoge,
ayegi jab meri yaad to aansu bahaoge,
chagoge mujhse milna par mil nahi paoge,
puchega koi mere baare me to, galti meri bataoge,
honge teri mehfil me sabhi,magar hume nahi paoge,
mehfil me rehkar b tanho ho jaoge,
sochoge jab mere baare me to phir pachtaoge,
meri nazar me hamesha bewafa kehlaoge
2) Zindagi ke tufaano ka saahil hai aapki dosti,
Dil ke armaano ki manzil hai aapki dosti,
zindagi bann jaayegi jannat,
agar maut aane tak saath rahe aapki dosti
3) Dil ke Kone se Ek Aawaz Aati hai,
Hame Har Pal Unki Yaad Aati hai,
Dil Puchta hai Baar Baar humse,
Jinhe hum Yaad Karte hai,
Kya Unhe Bhi Kabhi Hamari Yaad Aati hai… ...
4) Har Raat chandni raat nahi hoti,
har Dost me aap jaisi baat nahi hoti,
Na jaane KHUDA hame kya saza de raha hai,
joh aaj kal aapse mulakat nahi hoti
5) Kahan Koi Esa Mila Jispe Dil Luta Dete.
Har Ek Ne Dhoka Diya Kis KIs Ko Bhula Dete.
Apne Dil Ka Dard Dil Me HI Dabaye Rakhe He.
Karte Bayan To Mehfil Ko Rula Dete
6) main dooba to kinare pe khadi thi duniya,
hasne walo me mera muqaddar bhi tha,
ro raha tha jo janaze se lipat kar mere,
kaise keh doo k wohi mera qatil tha. ...
7) woh na aaye par unki yaad aa kar wafa kar gayi,
rahi tamanna har waqt milne ki mere aman sakun tabah kar gayi,
dar par aahat suni kai baar socha asarr dua kar gayi,
darwaza khola to koi nahi tha mazak humare saath hawa kar gayi.
8) ae mere jamaza uthane walo,
dekhna koi bewafa paas na ho,
agar ho to use kehna,
aaj khushi ka mauka hai udaas na ho,
9) Phir chupke se yaad aa gaya koi,
In hasti hui aakhon ko phir rulaa gaya koi,
Kaise Shukriya aada Karen uska,
Hum jaiso ko bhi YAAD kar gaya koi. ...
10) Dekhlo awaaz dekhar pass apne paoge,
Aaoge tanha par Tanha na jaoge,
Dur reh kar bhi tum par hai nazar meri,
Thaam lenge hath, jab bhi thokar khaoge
11) Aapki Tharif Hum Kare,
Itni Meri Shayary Mai Shabd Kahan,
Khuda Ne Khubsurathi Jo Aapko Di,
Itni Khubi Phulon Main Kahan.
12) Itna Muskara Kar Na Dekha Ki Jiye,
Ki Zamana Jal Jayega,
Aapke Ek Muskurahat Ke Liye,
Suraj Dhalna Bhool Jayega.
13) Ek Bar Humse Bhi Dil Lagakar Dekho,
Dil Main Aap Ki Taswir Hai,
Dil Hi Dil Main Pata Chal Jayega,
Humko Aapse Kitna Prem Hai.
14) Dil Main Hai Yadain Tere,
Aakhon Main Tera Chehra Hai,
Kaise Bandh Karloon Aankhe,
Tujhe Kho Dene Ka Dar Lagtha Hai.
15) Woh Chehra Harpal Yaad Aaye,
Tanhai Mai Dil Tadsaye,
Sirf Ek Awaz Soone Ko Dil Taraz Jaye,
Jab Bhi Aap Humse Dur Chali Jaye.
16) Khushbu teri Dosti ki muje mehka jati hai.
Teri har baat mujhe behka jaati hai,
Saas toh bahut der leti hai aane me…
har saas se pehle Teri yaad aa jati hai…
17) aaj hum unhe bewafa bata k aaye hai,
unke diye hue khat paani me baha k aaye hai,
koi nikaal k padd na le, is liye
paani me bhi aag laga kar aaye hai. ...
18) Lehro se milkar na woh beh sake na hum,
ek duje ke Dil me na woh reh sake na hum,
jeet lete aasma ek din lekin, palkon ke khamoshi ko
hoto se na woh keh sake na hum…
19) Kabhi pass aa gaye,
kabhi dur ho gaye,
unhone ek baar bhi mudkar na dekha hume,
par hum unke liye bewafa zarur ho gaye,
kya galti hui humse hum puchte rahe,
aur woh kehte rahe hum majhbur ho gaye,
hum mangte rahe dua unki khushiyon ki,
woh hume chodh kisi aur ki ankho ke noor ho gaye,
woh sochte rahe k khush hai hum,
par hum tut kar andar tak chakna chur ho gaye,
mujhe pyar karne ki mili itni badi saza
aur woh hume maarkar bhi bekasur ho gaye…
20) hum jee rahe the unka naam lekar,
vo gujarte the hamara salaam lekar,
ek din vo keh gaye bhula da humko,h
umne pucha kaise? vo chale gaye hath mein jaam dekar
21) Koi kehta hai zindagi zeher hoti hai,
Koi kehta hai zindagi kehar hoti hai,
hum kehta hai joh tadapti rahi sada kinare ke liye,
zindagi ek aisi lehar hoti hai\
22) Hasrat hai sirf aapko hasane ki,
aur koi khwaish nahi is begane ki.
Shikwa mujhe aapse nahi, khuda se hai, \
kya zarurat thi tumhe itna pyara banane ki
23) Tanha ho kabhi toh mujhe dhund lena,
is Dunia se nahi Apne Dil se puch lena.
Aapke aas pass hi kahi rehte hai hum,
Yaadon se nahi toh saath guzare lamho se puch lena
24) Dil tuta toh ek awaaz aayi,
Cheer ke dhekha toh ek cheez nikal aayi,
Socha kya hoga is khali Dil me,
Pani se dhokar dekha toh aap ki tasveer nazar aayi…
25) Khuli ankhon se dekha umar bhar ek aisa khwab jo apna na tha,
Hai aaj tak wo shakhs dil me jo us waqt bhi mera na tha.... ...
26) kaanch ko chahat thi patthar paane ki,
ek pal me fir tutkar bikhar jaane ki,
chahat bus itni thi us deewane ki,
apne tukdo me tasvir uski saajane ki,
27) Duniya me aane wale b kam na honge,
duniya se jaane wale b kam na honge,
suni reh jayegi aapki mehfil,
jab aapki mehfil me hum naa honge,
28) aaj bhi kai sawaal hai is dil me,
pyar ka gham bezubaan hai is dil me,
kuch keh nahi paata ye dil magar,
us bewafa k liye aaj b pyaar hai is dil me,
29) Machar aur Makhiki ho gayi shadi.
Pehli hi raat se ho gayi machar ki barbadi,
kehta hai ki meri kismat hi khoti hai,
makhi raat ko goodnight lagake soti hai.
30) Dil ka dard dil todne wale kya jaane,
Pyar ke rivajon ko zamana kya jaane,
Hoti hai kitni takleef ladki ko patane mein,
Ye ghar pe baitha ladki ka baap kya jaane
31) maine jo socha wo kabhi paya nahi,
chahkar bhi main usko bhul paya nahi,
chahta to tha main usko apnana,
per maine usko kabhi ye bataya nahi…
32) kabhi-kabhi aesa bhi hota hai,
pyar ka asar jara der se hota hai,
aapko lagta hai hum kuch nahi sochte aapke baare me,
par hamari har baat me aapka hi jikr hota hai.
33) jab yaad aati hai tumhari muskura lete hai,
kuch palo ke liye har gam bhula dete hai,
kaise bhig sakti hai aapki palken,
aapke hisse ke aansu to hum baha lete hain.
34) dete ho kyu ye dard bas humi ko
kya samjoge tum in ankho k nami ko
yu to honge lakhon diwane is chand ke
chand kya mehsus karega ek tare k kami Ko
35) Hum Nay Aap Ko Apni Aankhon Main Basaya Hai
Dil Ka Kamra Aap Hi K Liey Sajaya Hai
Aap Humain Msgs Tu Kartay Hi Nahin
Hum Nay Tu Msgs Pack Aap K Liey Hi Activate Karwaya Hai
36) jawaab teri shayari ka….
denge hum shayari mein….
naam tera likh baithe hain….
apne dil ki diary mein
37) Unn dino ki yaad ne aaj dilko phir rulaaya hei
Sur ke adhurepan ne, nagmo ne tumhe phir bulaaya hei
Tere jaane ke baad se dil mera khamoshi se dhadka
Khamosh mere dil ne, aaj kuch phir gun-gunaaya hei
38) Vafa-e-ishq mein hum luut jaayenge Aur tuje majboor kar jaayenge
Humei chahne ko tum majboor ho jaaoge Aur hum tumhe chorr jaayenge
Kasam hei mujhe apne pehle pyaar aur vafa ki
Jo dard diya hei tune mujhe Ush dard ka tuje ehsaas karvayenge
39) Jabh aankh mein nami si hoti hei,
Dil mein kisiki kami si hoti hei,
Jabh aankh jukh jaaye toe nami sukh jaaye,
Par koi bataaye kaise dil ka dukh jaaye...!
40) CHAHAT KO MERI MAJAK MAT SAMAJ,
JANAM JANAM TAK TERA SAATH NIBHUNGA,
JAB JAB DEGI PYAAR SE AAWAJ,
KABR SE BHI UTHKAR CHALA AAUNGA! ...
41) Kehna har baat zubaan se zaroori toh nahin,
Umar guzari hai aadhi poori toh nahi.
Dur zaroor baithe hain aapki nazaron se,
par Dil ki Dil se duri toh nahi! ...
42) haseeno ke husne pe mat jana dilwalo,
yea husne nahi naquab hai...
unke dil ke andar jhank kar dekho,
mohabath nahi tezaab hain ...
43) Beete pal wapas la nahi sakte,
Sukhe phool wapas khila nahi sakte,
Kabhi kabhi lagta hai aap hame bhul gaye,
Par kasam dosti ki dil kehta hai,
Ke aaap hame bhula nahi sakte
44) koi khat nahi,koi khabar nahi,
shayad apko dosti ki kadar nahi.
Hum apko yaad karte hain har sans ka sath ,
shayad apko hamari sanson ki fikar nahi
45) Rishta banaya hai to nibhayenge,
Har pal ap logon ko hasayenge,
Pata hain MHO WALON KO to FURSATH nahi yaad karne ki,
Hum hi tang kar-kar ka apni yaad dilayenge.. ...
46) Itna pyar na karo ke bigad jaye hum,
Thoda danta bhi karo ke sudhar jaye hum,
Agar ho jaye koi khata toh ho jana khafa,
par itna bhi nahi ke mar hi jaye hum…
47) Kuch wajey bhi hai ruth jaane ke liye,
Dil rota hai usse pukarne ke liye,
Zindagi tarasti hai uski ek jhalak ke liye,
uski ek muskaan kafi hai hame manane ke liye!
48) Bundo se bana hua chota sa Samandar,
Laharo pe bhigti choti si Basti,
Chal dunde Barish me bachpan ka sahil,
hath me lekar ek Kagaz ki Kashti
49) kuch na kisi se bolenge, bas tanhai main chup chap ro lenge,
apni to ek musafir jaisi hai jindagi, saath kisi k bhi ho lenge,
ye jeewan to ek jaher bhara pyala hai,
kab tak isme amrit gholenge,
50) Nazar humari,
Nazar tumhari,
Nazar ney dilki nazar utari .....
Nazar ney dekha nazar ko aisey,
Key kavi nazar na lagey,
Dosti ko humari ....
51) Payal chhankati ayee thi…..
Payal chhankati chali gayee,
Main sindoor leke khada tha,
Mujhe Rakhi pehnake chali gayee.
52)Na Maa ke pyaar se,
Na Daddy ke maar se,
Na doston ki fatkaar se,
Na ladki ki inkaar se....
Aur na hi chapplon ki bauchar se
Tujh jaise aashiq sudhrenge to,
RAKHI ke hathiyaar se
53) Khuda kare tujhe khushiyan hazaar mile,
Mujhse bhi achcha yaar mile,
Meri girlfriend tujhe bandhe RAKHI,
Aur ek AUR behan ka pyaar mile...
54) Saaqi teri mehfil mein ek mehmaan abhi baki hai....,
Teri may ka, tere roop ka kadardaan abhi baki hai....;
Iss tarah kaise uthh jaaoon, Kahani adhoori chhod kar aise...,
Tune rukh se naqaab uThaaya hai mera imtehaan abhi baki hai..!!!
55) Baadal garaja magar barasaat nahi aayi,
Dil dhadaka magar aawaj nahi aayi,
Pura din gujarane ko hai dost,
Kya ek baar bhi meri yaad nahi aayi
56) Aaj apne aap se khafaa hoon......
Jo uske chere ki madhoshiyaan na pad saka,
Par kya karoon uski yaad me aisa khoyaa
Ki uski muskurahat ke peeche ki shararat na pad saka
57) dost mera.dosti mera kuch is tarah intekam leti hai,
bat karna chahu magar majburiya kadam tham leti hai.
warna hum bewafa nahi bewafa to apni kismat hai
58) hota he ye aksar ki dil tut jaye.
hota he ye aksar ki mohabbat ka sath chut jaye.
par agar dil dhadke kisi ke nam se
to kyon koi kisi ka pyar bhul jaye
59) dard ho dil me to jataya nahi karte.
ankhon ke anshu kisi ko dikhaya nahi karte.
dil totjaye ye aksar hota he. isliye
kisi ki yaad dil me sajaya nahi karte
60) kuch na kisi se bolenge,
bas tanhai main chup chap ro lenge,
apni to ek musafir jaisi hai jindagi,
saath kisi k bhi ho lenge,
ye jeewan to ek jaher bhara pyala hai,
kab tak isme amrit gholenge
61) her shaam ko tera intezar kiya karte hai
her khawab main tera dedar kiya karte hai.
mohtaz hi to hai hum tere,
jo her waqt milne ka intezar kiya karte hai. ...
62) Palko me kaid kuch Sapne hai,
kuch Begane, kuch Apne hai,
Na jaane kya Khubsurti hai teri is dosti me,
aap humse dur hoke bhi kitne apne hai
63) Zindagi me kuch Sapne saja lena,
Dil me kuch Armaan jaga lena,
Hum aapki raho se har Dard chura lenge,
jab chaho aap humko Aazama lena…
64) Is Dil me tere liye itna pyaar rahega,
ke Waqt bhi uska Gawah rahega,
Tera Pyaar shayad kisi aur ke Nasib me ho,
Par sirf yeh Dil tere Yaadon ka haqdar rahega… ...
65) uski yaad ne mujhe phir rula diya,
kaisa hai wo zalim jisne ye sila diya,
do shabad likhne ka mujhe salika na tha,
aur aaj uski mohabbat ne mujhe shayar bana diya, ...
66) Aisi Dosti humari ki TU har raah har dagar mein mile,
marr bhi javu agar to tu dosti ki khatir PAAS WAALI KABAR MEIN MILE
67) Labo ki hasi tere naam kar denge,
har khushi tujh par kurbaan kar denge,
jis din hogi koi kami mere pyaar me,
Zindagi ko Maut ke Naam kar denge… ..
68) Kal Fursat Na Mili toh kya hoga,
Itni Mohabbat Na Mili toh kya hoga,
Roz Kehte ho Kal Milenge… Kal Milenge,
Kal Aankhen Na Khuli toh kya hoga
69) nahi ban jata koi apna dil lagane se,
karni padti hai dua rab se,sacha pyar pane mai,
rakhna sambhal kar ye aashiyana apna,
toot na jaye ye kisi k bahkane se.
70) kaagaz pe humne zindagi likh di,
ashkon se seench kar apni har khushi likh di,
dard jab humne ubhara lafzo me,
zamane ne kaha wah kya gazal likh di,
71) AaP Ki Duya Hai saRKaR
Ke aBHi TaK Hum Hain BaR KaRaR
miLjata thoRa sa pyaaR
agaR Hote aaJ aaPke DeeDaR
72) yaaro ki baatye aachi lagi
dil ko bhaylanye ke liye
ye shayaro shayari aachi lagi
mila na koi fir bhi
dil ko chan denye ki liye
yaaro ki shayari aachi lagi
73) Pyaar karna itna aasan nahi hota,
pyar bina rehna itna aasana nahi hota,
joh koi yaar ek baar dilko choo jaye toh,
uss yaar ko bhulana itna aasan nahi hota… ...
74) Na kuch der thahre,na kuch der bat ki,
badi aarzu thi mulakat ki,
na samjho ise tum koi dillagi,
bus samjho vajah mere haalat ki,
kat hi jayenge dukho k ye din,
subah hoti hai kyouki har raat ki
75) Dil me itni bekarari na thi,
zindagi kabhi itni pyari na thi,
zindagi-zindagi si lagti hi na thi,
aap jaise doston se jab yari na thi
76) Nazar uthi tho ada ban gayi,
nazar juki tho dua ban gayi,
Nazar na hoti tho nazara bhi na hota,
tum na hote tho hamara guzara bhi nahi hota........ .
77) kuch khoye bina hamne paya hain,
kuch mange bina hame mila hain,
naaz hain hame apni takdeer pe
jisne hame tum jaise dost se milaya hain
78) Khasish Dil ki har chiz bhula deti hai,
Bandh aankhon me bhi Sapne saja deti hai,
Sapno ki Duniya jarur rakhna,
kyonki Haqiqat toh sabko Rula deti hai
79) Khuli aankhon se tujhe dekhna kismat mein nahi..
Bas sapno mein tujko nihara karte hai.
Kuch nahi chahiye hame teri hasi ke siwa….
Duao mein isi khushi ko manga karte hai
80) A butterfly lives only 4 a day,
but still it flies joyfully capturing many hearts,
Each moments in life is indeed precious,
Live it fully and win as many hearts as u can.
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sidheshwar
From India, Bangalore
Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1) Chale jaoge beshak merei zindagi se,
magar is dil se kis tarah jaoge,
ayegi jab meri yaad to aansu bahaoge,
chagoge mujhse milna par mil nahi paoge,
puchega koi mere baare me to, galti meri bataoge,
honge teri mehfil me sabhi,magar hume nahi paoge,
mehfil me rehkar b tanho ho jaoge,
sochoge jab mere baare me to phir pachtaoge,
meri nazar me hamesha bewafa kehlaoge
2) Zindagi ke tufaano ka saahil hai aapki dosti,
Dil ke armaano ki manzil hai aapki dosti,
zindagi bann jaayegi jannat,
agar maut aane tak saath rahe aapki dosti
3) Dil ke Kone se Ek Aawaz Aati hai,
Hame Har Pal Unki Yaad Aati hai,
Dil Puchta hai Baar Baar humse,
Jinhe hum Yaad Karte hai,
Kya Unhe Bhi Kabhi Hamari Yaad Aati hai… ...
4) Har Raat chandni raat nahi hoti,
har Dost me aap jaisi baat nahi hoti,
Na jaane KHUDA hame kya saza de raha hai,
joh aaj kal aapse mulakat nahi hoti
5) Kahan Koi Esa Mila Jispe Dil Luta Dete.
Har Ek Ne Dhoka Diya Kis KIs Ko Bhula Dete.
Apne Dil Ka Dard Dil Me HI Dabaye Rakhe He.
Karte Bayan To Mehfil Ko Rula Dete
6) main dooba to kinare pe khadi thi duniya,
hasne walo me mera muqaddar bhi tha,
ro raha tha jo janaze se lipat kar mere,
kaise keh doo k wohi mera qatil tha. ...
7) woh na aaye par unki yaad aa kar wafa kar gayi,
rahi tamanna har waqt milne ki mere aman sakun tabah kar gayi,
dar par aahat suni kai baar socha asarr dua kar gayi,
darwaza khola to koi nahi tha mazak humare saath hawa kar gayi.
8) ae mere jamaza uthane walo,
dekhna koi bewafa paas na ho,
agar ho to use kehna,
aaj khushi ka mauka hai udaas na ho,
9) Phir chupke se yaad aa gaya koi,
In hasti hui aakhon ko phir rulaa gaya koi,
Kaise Shukriya aada Karen uska,
Hum jaiso ko bhi YAAD kar gaya koi. ...
10) Dekhlo awaaz dekhar pass apne paoge,
Aaoge tanha par Tanha na jaoge,
Dur reh kar bhi tum par hai nazar meri,
Thaam lenge hath, jab bhi thokar khaoge
11) Aapki Tharif Hum Kare,
Itni Meri Shayary Mai Shabd Kahan,
Khuda Ne Khubsurathi Jo Aapko Di,
Itni Khubi Phulon Main Kahan.
12) Itna Muskara Kar Na Dekha Ki Jiye,
Ki Zamana Jal Jayega,
Aapke Ek Muskurahat Ke Liye,
Suraj Dhalna Bhool Jayega.
13) Ek Bar Humse Bhi Dil Lagakar Dekho,
Dil Main Aap Ki Taswir Hai,
Dil Hi Dil Main Pata Chal Jayega,
Humko Aapse Kitna Prem Hai.
14) Dil Main Hai Yadain Tere,
Aakhon Main Tera Chehra Hai,
Kaise Bandh Karloon Aankhe,
Tujhe Kho Dene Ka Dar Lagtha Hai.
15) Woh Chehra Harpal Yaad Aaye,
Tanhai Mai Dil Tadsaye,
Sirf Ek Awaz Soone Ko Dil Taraz Jaye,
Jab Bhi Aap Humse Dur Chali Jaye.
16) Khushbu teri Dosti ki muje mehka jati hai.
Teri har baat mujhe behka jaati hai,
Saas toh bahut der leti hai aane me…
har saas se pehle Teri yaad aa jati hai…
17) aaj hum unhe bewafa bata k aaye hai,
unke diye hue khat paani me baha k aaye hai,
koi nikaal k padd na le, is liye
paani me bhi aag laga kar aaye hai. ...
18) Lehro se milkar na woh beh sake na hum,
ek duje ke Dil me na woh reh sake na hum,
jeet lete aasma ek din lekin, palkon ke khamoshi ko
hoto se na woh keh sake na hum…
19) Kabhi pass aa gaye,
kabhi dur ho gaye,
unhone ek baar bhi mudkar na dekha hume,
par hum unke liye bewafa zarur ho gaye,
kya galti hui humse hum puchte rahe,
aur woh kehte rahe hum majhbur ho gaye,
hum mangte rahe dua unki khushiyon ki,
woh hume chodh kisi aur ki ankho ke noor ho gaye,
woh sochte rahe k khush hai hum,
par hum tut kar andar tak chakna chur ho gaye,
mujhe pyar karne ki mili itni badi saza
aur woh hume maarkar bhi bekasur ho gaye…
20) hum jee rahe the unka naam lekar,
vo gujarte the hamara salaam lekar,
ek din vo keh gaye bhula da humko,h
umne pucha kaise? vo chale gaye hath mein jaam dekar
21) Koi kehta hai zindagi zeher hoti hai,
Koi kehta hai zindagi kehar hoti hai,
hum kehta hai joh tadapti rahi sada kinare ke liye,
zindagi ek aisi lehar hoti hai\
22) Hasrat hai sirf aapko hasane ki,
aur koi khwaish nahi is begane ki.
Shikwa mujhe aapse nahi, khuda se hai, \
kya zarurat thi tumhe itna pyara banane ki
23) Tanha ho kabhi toh mujhe dhund lena,
is Dunia se nahi Apne Dil se puch lena.
Aapke aas pass hi kahi rehte hai hum,
Yaadon se nahi toh saath guzare lamho se puch lena
24) Dil tuta toh ek awaaz aayi,
Cheer ke dhekha toh ek cheez nikal aayi,
Socha kya hoga is khali Dil me,
Pani se dhokar dekha toh aap ki tasveer nazar aayi…
25) Khuli ankhon se dekha umar bhar ek aisa khwab jo apna na tha,
Hai aaj tak wo shakhs dil me jo us waqt bhi mera na tha.... ...
26) kaanch ko chahat thi patthar paane ki,
ek pal me fir tutkar bikhar jaane ki,
chahat bus itni thi us deewane ki,
apne tukdo me tasvir uski saajane ki,
27) Duniya me aane wale b kam na honge,
duniya se jaane wale b kam na honge,
suni reh jayegi aapki mehfil,
jab aapki mehfil me hum naa honge,
28) aaj bhi kai sawaal hai is dil me,
pyar ka gham bezubaan hai is dil me,
kuch keh nahi paata ye dil magar,
us bewafa k liye aaj b pyaar hai is dil me,
29) Machar aur Makhiki ho gayi shadi.
Pehli hi raat se ho gayi machar ki barbadi,
kehta hai ki meri kismat hi khoti hai,
makhi raat ko goodnight lagake soti hai.
30) Dil ka dard dil todne wale kya jaane,
Pyar ke rivajon ko zamana kya jaane,
Hoti hai kitni takleef ladki ko patane mein,
Ye ghar pe baitha ladki ka baap kya jaane
31) maine jo socha wo kabhi paya nahi,
chahkar bhi main usko bhul paya nahi,
chahta to tha main usko apnana,
per maine usko kabhi ye bataya nahi…
32) kabhi-kabhi aesa bhi hota hai,
pyar ka asar jara der se hota hai,
aapko lagta hai hum kuch nahi sochte aapke baare me,
par hamari har baat me aapka hi jikr hota hai.
33) jab yaad aati hai tumhari muskura lete hai,
kuch palo ke liye har gam bhula dete hai,
kaise bhig sakti hai aapki palken,
aapke hisse ke aansu to hum baha lete hain.
34) dete ho kyu ye dard bas humi ko
kya samjoge tum in ankho k nami ko
yu to honge lakhon diwane is chand ke
chand kya mehsus karega ek tare k kami Ko
35) Hum Nay Aap Ko Apni Aankhon Main Basaya Hai
Dil Ka Kamra Aap Hi K Liey Sajaya Hai
Aap Humain Msgs Tu Kartay Hi Nahin
Hum Nay Tu Msgs Pack Aap K Liey Hi Activate Karwaya Hai
36) jawaab teri shayari ka….
denge hum shayari mein….
naam tera likh baithe hain….
apne dil ki diary mein
37) Unn dino ki yaad ne aaj dilko phir rulaaya hei
Sur ke adhurepan ne, nagmo ne tumhe phir bulaaya hei
Tere jaane ke baad se dil mera khamoshi se dhadka
Khamosh mere dil ne, aaj kuch phir gun-gunaaya hei
38) Vafa-e-ishq mein hum luut jaayenge Aur tuje majboor kar jaayenge
Humei chahne ko tum majboor ho jaaoge Aur hum tumhe chorr jaayenge
Kasam hei mujhe apne pehle pyaar aur vafa ki
Jo dard diya hei tune mujhe Ush dard ka tuje ehsaas karvayenge
39) Jabh aankh mein nami si hoti hei,
Dil mein kisiki kami si hoti hei,
Jabh aankh jukh jaaye toe nami sukh jaaye,
Par koi bataaye kaise dil ka dukh jaaye...!
40) CHAHAT KO MERI MAJAK MAT SAMAJ,
JANAM JANAM TAK TERA SAATH NIBHUNGA,
JAB JAB DEGI PYAAR SE AAWAJ,
KABR SE BHI UTHKAR CHALA AAUNGA! ...
41) Kehna har baat zubaan se zaroori toh nahin,
Umar guzari hai aadhi poori toh nahi.
Dur zaroor baithe hain aapki nazaron se,
par Dil ki Dil se duri toh nahi! ...
42) haseeno ke husne pe mat jana dilwalo,
yea husne nahi naquab hai...
unke dil ke andar jhank kar dekho,
mohabath nahi tezaab hain ...
43) Beete pal wapas la nahi sakte,
Sukhe phool wapas khila nahi sakte,
Kabhi kabhi lagta hai aap hame bhul gaye,
Par kasam dosti ki dil kehta hai,
Ke aaap hame bhula nahi sakte
44) koi khat nahi,koi khabar nahi,
shayad apko dosti ki kadar nahi.
Hum apko yaad karte hain har sans ka sath ,
shayad apko hamari sanson ki fikar nahi
45) Rishta banaya hai to nibhayenge,
Har pal ap logon ko hasayenge,
Pata hain MHO WALON KO to FURSATH nahi yaad karne ki,
Hum hi tang kar-kar ka apni yaad dilayenge.. ...
46) Itna pyar na karo ke bigad jaye hum,
Thoda danta bhi karo ke sudhar jaye hum,
Agar ho jaye koi khata toh ho jana khafa,
par itna bhi nahi ke mar hi jaye hum…
47) Kuch wajey bhi hai ruth jaane ke liye,
Dil rota hai usse pukarne ke liye,
Zindagi tarasti hai uski ek jhalak ke liye,
uski ek muskaan kafi hai hame manane ke liye!
48) Bundo se bana hua chota sa Samandar,
Laharo pe bhigti choti si Basti,
Chal dunde Barish me bachpan ka sahil,
hath me lekar ek Kagaz ki Kashti
49) kuch na kisi se bolenge, bas tanhai main chup chap ro lenge,
apni to ek musafir jaisi hai jindagi, saath kisi k bhi ho lenge,
ye jeewan to ek jaher bhara pyala hai,
kab tak isme amrit gholenge,
50) Nazar humari,
Nazar tumhari,
Nazar ney dilki nazar utari .....
Nazar ney dekha nazar ko aisey,
Key kavi nazar na lagey,
Dosti ko humari ....
51) Payal chhankati ayee thi…..
Payal chhankati chali gayee,
Main sindoor leke khada tha,
Mujhe Rakhi pehnake chali gayee.
52)Na Maa ke pyaar se,
Na Daddy ke maar se,
Na doston ki fatkaar se,
Na ladki ki inkaar se....
Aur na hi chapplon ki bauchar se
Tujh jaise aashiq sudhrenge to,
RAKHI ke hathiyaar se
53) Khuda kare tujhe khushiyan hazaar mile,
Mujhse bhi achcha yaar mile,
Meri girlfriend tujhe bandhe RAKHI,
Aur ek AUR behan ka pyaar mile...
54) Saaqi teri mehfil mein ek mehmaan abhi baki hai....,
Teri may ka, tere roop ka kadardaan abhi baki hai....;
Iss tarah kaise uthh jaaoon, Kahani adhoori chhod kar aise...,
Tune rukh se naqaab uThaaya hai mera imtehaan abhi baki hai..!!!
55) Baadal garaja magar barasaat nahi aayi,
Dil dhadaka magar aawaj nahi aayi,
Pura din gujarane ko hai dost,
Kya ek baar bhi meri yaad nahi aayi
56) Aaj apne aap se khafaa hoon......
Jo uske chere ki madhoshiyaan na pad saka,
Par kya karoon uski yaad me aisa khoyaa
Ki uski muskurahat ke peeche ki shararat na pad saka
57) dost mera.dosti mera kuch is tarah intekam leti hai,
bat karna chahu magar majburiya kadam tham leti hai.
warna hum bewafa nahi bewafa to apni kismat hai
58) hota he ye aksar ki dil tut jaye.
hota he ye aksar ki mohabbat ka sath chut jaye.
par agar dil dhadke kisi ke nam se
to kyon koi kisi ka pyar bhul jaye
59) dard ho dil me to jataya nahi karte.
ankhon ke anshu kisi ko dikhaya nahi karte.
dil totjaye ye aksar hota he. isliye
kisi ki yaad dil me sajaya nahi karte
60) kuch na kisi se bolenge,
bas tanhai main chup chap ro lenge,
apni to ek musafir jaisi hai jindagi,
saath kisi k bhi ho lenge,
ye jeewan to ek jaher bhara pyala hai,
kab tak isme amrit gholenge
61) her shaam ko tera intezar kiya karte hai
her khawab main tera dedar kiya karte hai.
mohtaz hi to hai hum tere,
jo her waqt milne ka intezar kiya karte hai. ...
62) Palko me kaid kuch Sapne hai,
kuch Begane, kuch Apne hai,
Na jaane kya Khubsurti hai teri is dosti me,
aap humse dur hoke bhi kitne apne hai
63) Zindagi me kuch Sapne saja lena,
Dil me kuch Armaan jaga lena,
Hum aapki raho se har Dard chura lenge,
jab chaho aap humko Aazama lena…
64) Is Dil me tere liye itna pyaar rahega,
ke Waqt bhi uska Gawah rahega,
Tera Pyaar shayad kisi aur ke Nasib me ho,
Par sirf yeh Dil tere Yaadon ka haqdar rahega… ...
65) uski yaad ne mujhe phir rula diya,
kaisa hai wo zalim jisne ye sila diya,
do shabad likhne ka mujhe salika na tha,
aur aaj uski mohabbat ne mujhe shayar bana diya, ...
66) Aisi Dosti humari ki TU har raah har dagar mein mile,
marr bhi javu agar to tu dosti ki khatir PAAS WAALI KABAR MEIN MILE
67) Labo ki hasi tere naam kar denge,
har khushi tujh par kurbaan kar denge,
jis din hogi koi kami mere pyaar me,
Zindagi ko Maut ke Naam kar denge… ..
68) Kal Fursat Na Mili toh kya hoga,
Itni Mohabbat Na Mili toh kya hoga,
Roz Kehte ho Kal Milenge… Kal Milenge,
Kal Aankhen Na Khuli toh kya hoga
69) nahi ban jata koi apna dil lagane se,
karni padti hai dua rab se,sacha pyar pane mai,
rakhna sambhal kar ye aashiyana apna,
toot na jaye ye kisi k bahkane se.
70) kaagaz pe humne zindagi likh di,
ashkon se seench kar apni har khushi likh di,
dard jab humne ubhara lafzo me,
zamane ne kaha wah kya gazal likh di,
71) AaP Ki Duya Hai saRKaR
Ke aBHi TaK Hum Hain BaR KaRaR
miLjata thoRa sa pyaaR
agaR Hote aaJ aaPke DeeDaR
72) yaaro ki baatye aachi lagi
dil ko bhaylanye ke liye
ye shayaro shayari aachi lagi
mila na koi fir bhi
dil ko chan denye ki liye
yaaro ki shayari aachi lagi
73) Pyaar karna itna aasan nahi hota,
pyar bina rehna itna aasana nahi hota,
joh koi yaar ek baar dilko choo jaye toh,
uss yaar ko bhulana itna aasan nahi hota… ...
74) Na kuch der thahre,na kuch der bat ki,
badi aarzu thi mulakat ki,
na samjho ise tum koi dillagi,
bus samjho vajah mere haalat ki,
kat hi jayenge dukho k ye din,
subah hoti hai kyouki har raat ki
75) Dil me itni bekarari na thi,
zindagi kabhi itni pyari na thi,
zindagi-zindagi si lagti hi na thi,
aap jaise doston se jab yari na thi
76) Nazar uthi tho ada ban gayi,
nazar juki tho dua ban gayi,
Nazar na hoti tho nazara bhi na hota,
tum na hote tho hamara guzara bhi nahi hota........ .
77) kuch khoye bina hamne paya hain,
kuch mange bina hame mila hain,
naaz hain hame apni takdeer pe
jisne hame tum jaise dost se milaya hain
78) Khasish Dil ki har chiz bhula deti hai,
Bandh aankhon me bhi Sapne saja deti hai,
Sapno ki Duniya jarur rakhna,
kyonki Haqiqat toh sabko Rula deti hai
79) Khuli aankhon se tujhe dekhna kismat mein nahi..
Bas sapno mein tujko nihara karte hai.
Kuch nahi chahiye hame teri hasi ke siwa….
Duao mein isi khushi ko manga karte hai
80) A butterfly lives only 4 a day,
but still it flies joyfully capturing many hearts,
Each moments in life is indeed precious,
Live it fully and win as many hearts as u can.
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sidheshwar
From India, Bangalore
Madmast hawa hai,
Mausam bhi suhana hai,
Bandar English me Hindi padh raha hai,
Kya educational zamana hai!
Anjan the kyun jaan bane
Khamosh juba se kuch kehne lage
Soi armano ko jagake dil mein
Muskura rahe ho khud anjan bane
Beta bola, "Papa papa mujhe bandar dekhna hai".
Papa bole, "Nahi bete, abhi nahi".
"Papa kyon ?"
"Bete abhi bandar SMS padh raha hai"
Kaun kehta hai dil pagal hai
Pagalpan to sirf aik bahana hai
Aik bar hans kar muskura kar to dekho
Yeh pagal tumhara deewana hai
Yaadon ka ek jhoka aaya, Hamse milne barson baad
Pehle itna nahi roye, Jitna aaj roye barson baad
Lamha-lamha ghar ujda hai, Mushkil se ehsaas hua
Pathar aye the barso pehle, Dil tuta barson baad
Apne hisse ki zindagi to hum jee chuke
Ab to bas dharkano ka lihaz karte hain
Kya kahein dunya waalo ko jo
Aakahri saans par bhi aitraaz karte hain
Hum to bethe hi aap ke pyar main
Tarapte hain dard ke is jaal main
Chor di hai dunya is takrar main
Jab se milli hain tanhayian aap ke intezar main
Khud se to pyar hum ne kabhi kiya hi nahin tha
Aap ke siwa kisi ko ye haq diya hi nahin tha
Mushkilon main aaj aap ne rishta hi tor diya
Roshni ka khawab dikha kar andhere main chor diya
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sidheshwar
From India, Bangalore
Mausam bhi suhana hai,
Bandar English me Hindi padh raha hai,
Kya educational zamana hai!
Anjan the kyun jaan bane
Khamosh juba se kuch kehne lage
Soi armano ko jagake dil mein
Muskura rahe ho khud anjan bane
Beta bola, "Papa papa mujhe bandar dekhna hai".
Papa bole, "Nahi bete, abhi nahi".
"Papa kyon ?"
"Bete abhi bandar SMS padh raha hai"
Kaun kehta hai dil pagal hai
Pagalpan to sirf aik bahana hai
Aik bar hans kar muskura kar to dekho
Yeh pagal tumhara deewana hai
Yaadon ka ek jhoka aaya, Hamse milne barson baad
Pehle itna nahi roye, Jitna aaj roye barson baad
Lamha-lamha ghar ujda hai, Mushkil se ehsaas hua
Pathar aye the barso pehle, Dil tuta barson baad
Apne hisse ki zindagi to hum jee chuke
Ab to bas dharkano ka lihaz karte hain
Kya kahein dunya waalo ko jo
Aakahri saans par bhi aitraaz karte hain
Hum to bethe hi aap ke pyar main
Tarapte hain dard ke is jaal main
Chor di hai dunya is takrar main
Jab se milli hain tanhayian aap ke intezar main
Khud se to pyar hum ne kabhi kiya hi nahin tha
Aap ke siwa kisi ko ye haq diya hi nahin tha
Mushkilon main aaj aap ne rishta hi tor diya
Roshni ka khawab dikha kar andhere main chor diya
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sidheshwar
From India, Bangalore
Hume to aadat hai Hasane ki ! ! !
How a girl replies if Himesh proposes;
O huzoor, bhaad me jaaye tera suroor,
surat se hai tu khajoor,
bidi ki factory ka majdoor,
chal hoja door abey langoor!!!!
* * * * * *
Tabiyat theek nahi thi,
Tantrik ko dikhlaaya,
vo bola tumper BHOOT ka saaya hai,
jaaldi se kisi GHOR PAAPI ko SMS karo bilkul thik ho jaogee.
Saachi ab SMS ke baad achaa feel hone lagaa hai.
* * * * * *
Jatt Proposes to a Girl :
Kutta mar gaya razai vich…
Main paagal ho gaya teri judai vich…
Fernail te machar beh nai sakda
Te main tere bin reh nahi sakda!!
* * * * * *
Suno gaur se PEPSI walo,
Buri nazar na COKE pe dalo,
Chahe jitna DEW pila lo..
Sabse aage hoga Nimbu paani!!
Humne piyaaa hai………….tum bhi piyo!!!!
* * * * * *
Cycle chalate waqt handle ko dekho
Ladki patate waqt sandle ko dekho
* * * * * *
Kitni hasin ho tum, khud ko duniya ki nazar se bachaya karo
Aankhon mein kaajal lagana hi kaafi nahi…
plz gale mein nimbu-mirchi bhi latkaya karo
* * * * * *
Aati thi . . . Jaati thi
Hasti thi . . . Hasati thi
Dekhti thi . . . Muskurati thi
Bhagti thi . . . Bhagati thi
Ab pata chala… sali bevakuf banati thi
* * * * * *
Sapne dekho to use apna banalo,
Ya phir usme kho jao,
Dost banao to use apna banalo,
Ya usme kho jao,
Agar kuch bhi nahin to phir takiya lo aur so jao......... .....Gud Nite
* * * * * *
Train mein TT Sadhu se bola: Kahan jana hai?
Sadhu: Jahan Ram ka janam hua tha.
TT: Ticket hai?
Sadhu: Nahin
TT: Chalo
Sadhu: Kahan?
TT: Jahan Krishan ka janam hua tha…. Jail mein
* * * * * *
socha rahan hOOn taj mahal banau
socha rahan hOOn taj mahal banau
lekin mumtaz nahi fir kyun banau
lekin mumtaz nahi fir kyun banau
mumtaz mili boli taj mahal baNao
maine bola pehle aapne baap se paise toh lekar aao!!
* * * * * *
Sitaroon se aagy jahan aur bhi hein,
Abhi muhabat k imthan aur bhi hein,
Tum hi nehi jalaty mere dil ko,
University mein ladkiyaan aur bhi hein
* * * * * *
Khuda bachaye hume in haseeno se…
Nazneenon se
Dilnasheenon se
Jaannasheenon se
Par inhe kaun bachaye hum kameeno se!!!
* * * * * *
Santa : Yaar, main apni girlfriend nu gift dena hai… ki devan??
Banta : Gold ring de de
Santa : nai yaar, koi badi cheez das.
Banta : MRF da tyre de de
* * * * * *
Kaun kehta hai pyaar mein pakrey jayenge?
Kaun kehta hai pyaar mein pakrey jayege?
Waqt aane par bhai behen ban jayenge!!!
* * * * * *
EK LADKI THI DEEWANI SI.......... ......... ....
EK SUBJECT PE WO MARTI THI......... ......... ...
BOOKS UTHAKAR, CHASHMA LAGAKAR..... .........
LIBRARY SE GUZARTI THI......... ......... ........
KUCHH PADNA THA SHAYAD USKO........ .....
JAANE KISSE DARTI THI......... ......... .....
JAB BHI MILTI THI MUJHSE,..... ......... ....
MUJHSE POOCHHA KARTI THI......... .........
ENGG. KAISE HOTI HAI......... ......... ......
YE ENGG. KAISE HOTI HAI......... ......... ......... ..
AUR MEIN BAS ITNA KEH PATA THA......... ......... ..
"KITABEN KHULI HON YA HON BAND
PADHAI LAST NIGHT HI HOTI HAI
KAISE KAHOON MAIN O YAARA YE
ENGG. AISE HI HOTI HAI......
Zindagi mein hamesha muskurate raho,
Hasna zindagi ki zarorat hai.
Zindagi jio is andaz mein ke tumhe dekhkar sab kahen…
Zindagi kitni Khoobsurat hai!!
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From India, Bangalore
How a girl replies if Himesh proposes;
O huzoor, bhaad me jaaye tera suroor,
surat se hai tu khajoor,
bidi ki factory ka majdoor,
chal hoja door abey langoor!!!!
* * * * * *
Tabiyat theek nahi thi,
Tantrik ko dikhlaaya,
vo bola tumper BHOOT ka saaya hai,
jaaldi se kisi GHOR PAAPI ko SMS karo bilkul thik ho jaogee.
Saachi ab SMS ke baad achaa feel hone lagaa hai.
* * * * * *
Jatt Proposes to a Girl :
Kutta mar gaya razai vich…
Main paagal ho gaya teri judai vich…
Fernail te machar beh nai sakda
Te main tere bin reh nahi sakda!!
* * * * * *
Suno gaur se PEPSI walo,
Buri nazar na COKE pe dalo,
Chahe jitna DEW pila lo..
Sabse aage hoga Nimbu paani!!
Humne piyaaa hai………….tum bhi piyo!!!!
* * * * * *
Cycle chalate waqt handle ko dekho
Ladki patate waqt sandle ko dekho
* * * * * *
Kitni hasin ho tum, khud ko duniya ki nazar se bachaya karo
Aankhon mein kaajal lagana hi kaafi nahi…
plz gale mein nimbu-mirchi bhi latkaya karo
* * * * * *
Aati thi . . . Jaati thi
Hasti thi . . . Hasati thi
Dekhti thi . . . Muskurati thi
Bhagti thi . . . Bhagati thi
Ab pata chala… sali bevakuf banati thi
* * * * * *
Sapne dekho to use apna banalo,
Ya phir usme kho jao,
Dost banao to use apna banalo,
Ya usme kho jao,
Agar kuch bhi nahin to phir takiya lo aur so jao......... .....Gud Nite
* * * * * *
Train mein TT Sadhu se bola: Kahan jana hai?
Sadhu: Jahan Ram ka janam hua tha.
TT: Ticket hai?
Sadhu: Nahin
TT: Chalo
Sadhu: Kahan?
TT: Jahan Krishan ka janam hua tha…. Jail mein
* * * * * *
socha rahan hOOn taj mahal banau
socha rahan hOOn taj mahal banau
lekin mumtaz nahi fir kyun banau
lekin mumtaz nahi fir kyun banau
mumtaz mili boli taj mahal baNao
maine bola pehle aapne baap se paise toh lekar aao!!
* * * * * *
Sitaroon se aagy jahan aur bhi hein,
Abhi muhabat k imthan aur bhi hein,
Tum hi nehi jalaty mere dil ko,
University mein ladkiyaan aur bhi hein
* * * * * *
Khuda bachaye hume in haseeno se…
Nazneenon se
Dilnasheenon se
Jaannasheenon se
Par inhe kaun bachaye hum kameeno se!!!
* * * * * *
Santa : Yaar, main apni girlfriend nu gift dena hai… ki devan??
Banta : Gold ring de de
Santa : nai yaar, koi badi cheez das.
Banta : MRF da tyre de de
* * * * * *
Kaun kehta hai pyaar mein pakrey jayenge?
Kaun kehta hai pyaar mein pakrey jayege?
Waqt aane par bhai behen ban jayenge!!!
* * * * * *
EK LADKI THI DEEWANI SI.......... ......... ....
EK SUBJECT PE WO MARTI THI......... ......... ...
BOOKS UTHAKAR, CHASHMA LAGAKAR..... .........
LIBRARY SE GUZARTI THI......... ......... ........
KUCHH PADNA THA SHAYAD USKO........ .....
JAANE KISSE DARTI THI......... ......... .....
JAB BHI MILTI THI MUJHSE,..... ......... ....
MUJHSE POOCHHA KARTI THI......... .........
ENGG. KAISE HOTI HAI......... ......... ......
YE ENGG. KAISE HOTI HAI......... ......... ......... ..
AUR MEIN BAS ITNA KEH PATA THA......... ......... ..
"KITABEN KHULI HON YA HON BAND
PADHAI LAST NIGHT HI HOTI HAI
KAISE KAHOON MAIN O YAARA YE
ENGG. AISE HI HOTI HAI......
Zindagi mein hamesha muskurate raho,
Hasna zindagi ki zarorat hai.
Zindagi jio is andaz mein ke tumhe dekhkar sab kahen…
Zindagi kitni Khoobsurat hai!!
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From India, Bangalore
January to December
Sunday to Saturday
Am to Pm
My feelings for u have never changed..... ..
U....
R....
Always....
A HEADACHE to me !!!!
When u feel lonely and alone & cannot see any one around you,
The world seems to be fading away,
Come along with me
I'll take u an eye specialist !!
If marriages are made in heaven , then what are made in Hell?
Ans : the days after marriage
During Marriage ceremony why are you made to sit on the horse ?
You are given your last chance to run away.
Just close ur eyes and think of urself for 10 seconds..... .
Open ur eyes !
Now you will realize that u have wasted 10 sec in thinking of a
Fool........ ....
I wrote ur name on the sands....... ......
It got washed away,
I wrote ur name in air......... ......... ........
It got blown away,
So I wrote ur name in my heart....... ......
I got a HEART ATTACK
LOVE is like a CIGAR
It starts with a fire..... Continues with smoke.....and ends in
Ashes...
But don't worry - we are chain smokers
Ur smile can be compared to a flower
Ur voice can be compared to a cuckoo
Ur innocence to a child
But in stupidity
U have no comparison
U r the best
True love is like a pillow
U
can hug when u r in trouble
U can cry on when u r in pain & u can embrace when u r happy
So when u need true love
Spend Rs.50/-Buy a pillow
Dear Friend,
When I ask u flower,
U give me bouquet
When I ask u a stone
U give me a statue
When I ask u a feather
U give me peacock
ARE U REALLY DEAF ?
I had VODKA with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I had WHISKY with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I had RUM with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I SWEAR I'LL NEVER DRINK water....!!!
When I call u;
1 ring means I'm thinking of u;
2 ring means I like u;
3 means I miss u;
4 means .........pick d phone idiot
Teacher : four beautiful ladies r walking on the road. Change it to
Exclamatory sentence ...
Student : WOW !
The human brain is most outstanding thing.......
It functions 24hrs 365 days.....
It functions right from the time u r Born.... Until you fall in love
SMILE - is a language of love
SMILE - is a source to win hearts...
SMILE - creates greatness in ur personality
SO....
Brush ur Teeth today onwards
A cigarette shortens your life by 2 min..
A beer shortens your life by 4 min..
A working day shortens your life by 8 hours!!!!..
History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ?
Student : sir, I am not sure but think from page 15 to 26 sir....
Teacher : U failure ! @ ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir, but @ ur age Hitler had commited suicide
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From India, Bangalore
Sunday to Saturday
Am to Pm
My feelings for u have never changed..... ..
U....
R....
Always....
A HEADACHE to me !!!!
When u feel lonely and alone & cannot see any one around you,
The world seems to be fading away,
Come along with me
I'll take u an eye specialist !!
If marriages are made in heaven , then what are made in Hell?
Ans : the days after marriage
During Marriage ceremony why are you made to sit on the horse ?
You are given your last chance to run away.
Just close ur eyes and think of urself for 10 seconds..... .
Open ur eyes !
Now you will realize that u have wasted 10 sec in thinking of a
Fool........ ....
I wrote ur name on the sands....... ......
It got washed away,
I wrote ur name in air......... ......... ........
It got blown away,
So I wrote ur name in my heart....... ......
I got a HEART ATTACK
LOVE is like a CIGAR
It starts with a fire..... Continues with smoke.....and ends in
Ashes...
But don't worry - we are chain smokers
Ur smile can be compared to a flower
Ur voice can be compared to a cuckoo
Ur innocence to a child
But in stupidity
U have no comparison
U r the best
True love is like a pillow
U
can hug when u r in trouble
U can cry on when u r in pain & u can embrace when u r happy
So when u need true love
Spend Rs.50/-Buy a pillow
Dear Friend,
When I ask u flower,
U give me bouquet
When I ask u a stone
U give me a statue
When I ask u a feather
U give me peacock
ARE U REALLY DEAF ?
I had VODKA with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I had WHISKY with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I had RUM with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I SWEAR I'LL NEVER DRINK water....!!!
When I call u;
1 ring means I'm thinking of u;
2 ring means I like u;
3 means I miss u;
4 means .........pick d phone idiot
Teacher : four beautiful ladies r walking on the road. Change it to
Exclamatory sentence ...
Student : WOW !
The human brain is most outstanding thing.......
It functions 24hrs 365 days.....
It functions right from the time u r Born.... Until you fall in love
SMILE - is a language of love
SMILE - is a source to win hearts...
SMILE - creates greatness in ur personality
SO....
Brush ur Teeth today onwards
A cigarette shortens your life by 2 min..
A beer shortens your life by 4 min..
A working day shortens your life by 8 hours!!!!..
History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ?
Student : sir, I am not sure but think from page 15 to 26 sir....
Teacher : U failure ! @ ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir, but @ ur age Hitler had commited suicide
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From India, Bangalore
Hi Ashra, I put my mobile in COVER always and handset is of NOKIA so its gud. I keep forwarding important SMS in YAHOO SMS BACKUP. Anyway how ru? Regards Sidheshwar
From India, Bangalore
From India, Bangalore
Maine kaha "Dil Ruba"
Usne kaha balance bhijwa
Maine kaha "Paise Nahi"
Usne kaha "Kaise nahi"
Maine kaha "Mehangai Hai"
Usne kaha "Ja aaj se tu mera bhai ha
HAMARI DOSTI RAYMOND JAISI NAHIN... SINCE 1925 ,
PEPSI JAISI BHI NAHIN , KE YE DIL MAANGE MORE...
YE HOGI L.I.C. JAISI ,
JINDAGI KE SAATH BHI , JINDAGI KE BAAD BHI....
Newtons First Law of ishq
the force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and
oppositeto the force applied by the girl while using her sandals
Newtons 2nd law of ishq
the rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is
directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and
the direction of this love is same to as increament or decreament of
the bank balance.
Newtons First Law of Ishq
a boy in love with a girl, continue to be in love with her and a girl
in love with a boy, continue to be in love with him, untill on unless
any external agent(brother or father of the gal) comes into play and
break the legs of the boy.
Newtons Law of Romance
LOVE CAN NEITHER BE CREATED NOR BE DESTROYED,
IT CAN ONLY BE CHANGED FROM
ONE GIRL FRIEND TO ANOTHER...
itne choti nhi dosti apni,
kaise soch liya k keenara a gieya
ho gai mobile main roshni,
aur sms humara a gieya
4 roses just for you,bcoz u r special person.
1st rose for frdship,
2nd rose for good luck,
3rd rose for happiness
aur last kaan ke upper lagana mast lagega.
kasur na unka hai na mera,
hum donohi rishton ki rasmein nibhate rahe
wo dosti ka ehsaas jatate rahe
hum mohabbat ko dil mein chupate rahe muskan
TUMHARE SATH RAHON CHAND BAAM PAR DEKHON
TUMHARE SANG HI MAIN EID KA MANZAR DEKHON
TUMHARE NAM SE BADLAY SHAYAD TAQDEER MERI
TUMHARA NAM MAIN HATHON PAY SAJA KAR DEKHON
Chale gaye ho dur kuch pal ke liye,
Dur rehkar bhi karib ho har pal ke liye,
Kaise yaad na aaye aapki ek pal ke liye,
Jab dil me ho aap harpal ke liye
tere hontoon pe saj jaon dua honay ko ge chahta hai,
mera duniya bhula kar bas tera honay ko ge chahta hai,
yun sab ke samne ithkheliyan karti hai ye tujh se,
ke beiraada he hawa honay ko ge chahta hai.
You are a GHONCHU..
G-reat
H-ot
O-ne in million
N-aughty
C-ute
H-umble
U-nique
Zyada khush mat ho, hai to tu ghonchu hi
Saathi sirf vo to nahin hota jo jeewan bhar saath nibhaye, Saathi to
vo hota hai jo jeewan ke kuch palon mein hi jeewan bhar ka saath de
jaaye. Gud Day.
If I could have just one wish,
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you.
R u Mail or Femail
Answer k liye
nechay dekho
-
-
-
Bewakoof yahan nahe
apne nechay dekho
SARDARNI SAY:- aji sunday o..Aj 3 dako aaye see.. unhaan nay mere
izat lut laee jay.
SARDAR SAY:- toon onhaan noo rokya naeen....?
SARDARNI REPLIES:- bohot rokya see... per o rukay e naeen.... kehen
lagay HUN SANO JAAN DAY...ASSI THAK GAEE AAN aamirmultan
Girls r special ones created by god..
if u praise her,she thinks u r tell'g lies
if u dont, u r gud 4 noth'g if she
talks,she wants u 2 listen.if u listen,
she wants u 2 talk. if u tuch her, u r not a
gentleman. if u dont, u not a man.
If u agree 2 all her likes, u r a wimp.
if u dont, u r not understand'g so
simple yet so complex, so wierd yet
so beautiful. Thats a girl...!
Na Gujarna EID ke Din kisi Masjid Ke samne se, kahi log CHAND samjkar
ROJA Na Tod de, Hokar Khafa Khuda Tumse kahi Chand Jaise Chehre
Banana na Chor De..
Ur eyes Patakha,
ur lips Rocket,
ur ears Chakri,
ur smile Fuljadi,
ur style Anar,
ur personality Bomb.
Beta nikal le,
i'm coming with "candle
Simple bye makes us cry; Simple joke makes us laugh; Simple care
makes us fall in love; Simple touch makes us feel better but I hope
my simple SMS makes you smile!--.(
3 Fastest means of communication
1 : Tele-Phone
2 : Tele-Vision
3 : Tell-a-women
Need still faster?(
Tell her not 2 tell any1...Swapnil
If I could have just one wish,
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you
Es Dil ka kaha mano ek ehsan kardo
ek benaam si muhabat mere naam krdo
mere zaat pe fakat itna ehsaan krdo
ek subah ko milo or sham krdo Zaibo
From India, Bangalore
Usne kaha balance bhijwa
Maine kaha "Paise Nahi"
Usne kaha "Kaise nahi"
Maine kaha "Mehangai Hai"
Usne kaha "Ja aaj se tu mera bhai ha
HAMARI DOSTI RAYMOND JAISI NAHIN... SINCE 1925 ,
PEPSI JAISI BHI NAHIN , KE YE DIL MAANGE MORE...
YE HOGI L.I.C. JAISI ,
JINDAGI KE SAATH BHI , JINDAGI KE BAAD BHI....
Newtons First Law of ishq
the force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and
oppositeto the force applied by the girl while using her sandals
Newtons 2nd law of ishq
the rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is
directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and
the direction of this love is same to as increament or decreament of
the bank balance.
Newtons First Law of Ishq
a boy in love with a girl, continue to be in love with her and a girl
in love with a boy, continue to be in love with him, untill on unless
any external agent(brother or father of the gal) comes into play and
break the legs of the boy.
Newtons Law of Romance
LOVE CAN NEITHER BE CREATED NOR BE DESTROYED,
IT CAN ONLY BE CHANGED FROM
ONE GIRL FRIEND TO ANOTHER...
itne choti nhi dosti apni,
kaise soch liya k keenara a gieya
ho gai mobile main roshni,
aur sms humara a gieya
4 roses just for you,bcoz u r special person.
1st rose for frdship,
2nd rose for good luck,
3rd rose for happiness
aur last kaan ke upper lagana mast lagega.
kasur na unka hai na mera,
hum donohi rishton ki rasmein nibhate rahe
wo dosti ka ehsaas jatate rahe
hum mohabbat ko dil mein chupate rahe muskan
TUMHARE SATH RAHON CHAND BAAM PAR DEKHON
TUMHARE SANG HI MAIN EID KA MANZAR DEKHON
TUMHARE NAM SE BADLAY SHAYAD TAQDEER MERI
TUMHARA NAM MAIN HATHON PAY SAJA KAR DEKHON
Chale gaye ho dur kuch pal ke liye,
Dur rehkar bhi karib ho har pal ke liye,
Kaise yaad na aaye aapki ek pal ke liye,
Jab dil me ho aap harpal ke liye
tere hontoon pe saj jaon dua honay ko ge chahta hai,
mera duniya bhula kar bas tera honay ko ge chahta hai,
yun sab ke samne ithkheliyan karti hai ye tujh se,
ke beiraada he hawa honay ko ge chahta hai.
You are a GHONCHU..
G-reat
H-ot
O-ne in million
N-aughty
C-ute
H-umble
U-nique
Zyada khush mat ho, hai to tu ghonchu hi
Saathi sirf vo to nahin hota jo jeewan bhar saath nibhaye, Saathi to
vo hota hai jo jeewan ke kuch palon mein hi jeewan bhar ka saath de
jaaye. Gud Day.
If I could have just one wish,
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you.
R u Mail or Femail
Answer k liye
nechay dekho
-
-
-
Bewakoof yahan nahe
apne nechay dekho
SARDARNI SAY:- aji sunday o..Aj 3 dako aaye see.. unhaan nay mere
izat lut laee jay.
SARDAR SAY:- toon onhaan noo rokya naeen....?
SARDARNI REPLIES:- bohot rokya see... per o rukay e naeen.... kehen
lagay HUN SANO JAAN DAY...ASSI THAK GAEE AAN aamirmultan
Girls r special ones created by god..
if u praise her,she thinks u r tell'g lies
if u dont, u r gud 4 noth'g if she
talks,she wants u 2 listen.if u listen,
she wants u 2 talk. if u tuch her, u r not a
gentleman. if u dont, u not a man.
If u agree 2 all her likes, u r a wimp.
if u dont, u r not understand'g so
simple yet so complex, so wierd yet
so beautiful. Thats a girl...!
Na Gujarna EID ke Din kisi Masjid Ke samne se, kahi log CHAND samjkar
ROJA Na Tod de, Hokar Khafa Khuda Tumse kahi Chand Jaise Chehre
Banana na Chor De..
Ur eyes Patakha,
ur lips Rocket,
ur ears Chakri,
ur smile Fuljadi,
ur style Anar,
ur personality Bomb.
Beta nikal le,
i'm coming with "candle
Simple bye makes us cry; Simple joke makes us laugh; Simple care
makes us fall in love; Simple touch makes us feel better but I hope
my simple SMS makes you smile!--.(
3 Fastest means of communication
1 : Tele-Phone
2 : Tele-Vision
3 : Tell-a-women
Need still faster?(
Tell her not 2 tell any1...Swapnil
If I could have just one wish,
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you
Es Dil ka kaha mano ek ehsan kardo
ek benaam si muhabat mere naam krdo
mere zaat pe fakat itna ehsaan krdo
ek subah ko milo or sham krdo Zaibo
From India, Bangalore
Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one. He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and *AGAIN* barefeet!"
Santa : 'Have you ever heard of the Suez Canal?'
Banta : 'Yes, I have'
Santa : 'Well, my father dug it.'
Banta : 'That's nothing, have you ever heard of Dead sea?'
Santa : 'Yes, I have.'
Banta : 'Well, my father killed it.'
A sardar sees lot of guys running on the highway. Asks a bystander as to why are the guys doing what they are doing The
bystander : A Marathon race is going on.
Sardar : What do they get from that?
Bystander : The winner will get a prize
Sardar : Then why are the others running?!
A Sardarji was in a nightclub in New York, dancing with a beautiful woman.
He whispered into her ear, "I love you."
She smiled and whispered back,"I love you too". then he whispered, "I love you three."
Three Sardarjis went for a tour to singapore . They searched for rooms everywhere and finally got one which is in the topmost floor of a 100 floor hotel. After taking rest they started for a local visit.
While leaving the hotel, the manager informed them that they should reach the hotel before 10.00pm or else lift will not be available and they have to take the steps for which they agreed and went out.
After all the entertainment in the city, they reached back late at 10.30.
Since lift was not available, they decided to take the stairways under the condition that each sardarji has to tell a story that lasts for 33 floors so that they can reach the 100th floor without much trouble.
After first sardarji finished his story in 33rd floor, the third sardarji said," I have a sad story to say, but i will tell at the end only". Then second sardarji finished his story and the third finished his story and finally they reached the 100th floor.
Then first sardarji asked what was the sad story.
The third one said, "I forgot the room key which is on the manager's table".
They once again started back to the first floor and this time the second sardarji after crossing 33 floors from top said," I got a sad story, but I will also say that at the end".
They finally reached the first floor and when asked about the sad story, the second sardarji said, " The keys were in my pocket only".
With anger and full tired, they once again start from the first floor.
After reaching the 33rd floor, the third sardarji said, " I too have a sad story, but I will say at the end only". Then they reached the 100th floor and the second one asked the third sardarji about the sad story, he replied:
....
....
....
....
" This is not our hotel, It is on the other side of road, opposite to this".
A man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee.....
On his first day, he dialled the kitchen and shouted into the phone:
"Get me a cup of coffee, quickly!"
The voice from the other side responded: "You fool; you've dialled
the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to?"
"No" replied the trainee.
"It's the Managing Director of the company, you idiot!"
trainee shouted back: "And do you know who YOU are talking to, you
IDIOT?"
"No!" replied the Managing Director angrily.
"Thank God!" replied the trainee and put down the phone .....
A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in his room. So he decided to send an E-MAIL to his wife.
However he accidently typed the wrong e-mail address and without realising his error, he sent the message. Meanwhile,
somewhere in mumbai a widow had just returned home from her husband's funrel. The widow decided to check her mail,
expecting message from her relatives and friends.; After reading the first message she fainted. The widow's son rushed into
the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My loving wife
Subject: I've just reached
Date: 13th oct 2006
I know you are surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now, and you are allowed to sent e-mails to your loved ones.
I've just reached and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tommorrow. Looking forward to seeing you.
Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was;
A couple drove down a country road for several miles,
not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position,
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws"
A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load
Of seniors down a highway
When he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady.
She offers him a handful of peanuts,
Which he gratefully munches up.
After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder
Again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.
She repeats this gesture about five more times.
When she is about to hand him another batch again
He asks the little old lady,
" why don`t you eat the peanuts yourself?".
"We can't chew them because we've no teeth", she replied.
The puzzled driver asks,
"Why do you buy them then?"
The old lady replied,
"We just love the chocolate around them ."
From India, Bangalore
Santa : 'Have you ever heard of the Suez Canal?'
Banta : 'Yes, I have'
Santa : 'Well, my father dug it.'
Banta : 'That's nothing, have you ever heard of Dead sea?'
Santa : 'Yes, I have.'
Banta : 'Well, my father killed it.'
A sardar sees lot of guys running on the highway. Asks a bystander as to why are the guys doing what they are doing The
bystander : A Marathon race is going on.
Sardar : What do they get from that?
Bystander : The winner will get a prize
Sardar : Then why are the others running?!
A Sardarji was in a nightclub in New York, dancing with a beautiful woman.
He whispered into her ear, "I love you."
She smiled and whispered back,"I love you too". then he whispered, "I love you three."
Three Sardarjis went for a tour to singapore . They searched for rooms everywhere and finally got one which is in the topmost floor of a 100 floor hotel. After taking rest they started for a local visit.
While leaving the hotel, the manager informed them that they should reach the hotel before 10.00pm or else lift will not be available and they have to take the steps for which they agreed and went out.
After all the entertainment in the city, they reached back late at 10.30.
Since lift was not available, they decided to take the stairways under the condition that each sardarji has to tell a story that lasts for 33 floors so that they can reach the 100th floor without much trouble.
After first sardarji finished his story in 33rd floor, the third sardarji said," I have a sad story to say, but i will tell at the end only". Then second sardarji finished his story and the third finished his story and finally they reached the 100th floor.
Then first sardarji asked what was the sad story.
The third one said, "I forgot the room key which is on the manager's table".
They once again started back to the first floor and this time the second sardarji after crossing 33 floors from top said," I got a sad story, but I will also say that at the end".
They finally reached the first floor and when asked about the sad story, the second sardarji said, " The keys were in my pocket only".
With anger and full tired, they once again start from the first floor.
After reaching the 33rd floor, the third sardarji said, " I too have a sad story, but I will say at the end only". Then they reached the 100th floor and the second one asked the third sardarji about the sad story, he replied:
....
....
....
....
" This is not our hotel, It is on the other side of road, opposite to this".
A man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee.....
On his first day, he dialled the kitchen and shouted into the phone:
"Get me a cup of coffee, quickly!"
The voice from the other side responded: "You fool; you've dialled
the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to?"
"No" replied the trainee.
"It's the Managing Director of the company, you idiot!"
trainee shouted back: "And do you know who YOU are talking to, you
IDIOT?"
"No!" replied the Managing Director angrily.
"Thank God!" replied the trainee and put down the phone .....
A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in his room. So he decided to send an E-MAIL to his wife.
However he accidently typed the wrong e-mail address and without realising his error, he sent the message. Meanwhile,
somewhere in mumbai a widow had just returned home from her husband's funrel. The widow decided to check her mail,
expecting message from her relatives and friends.; After reading the first message she fainted. The widow's son rushed into
the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My loving wife
Subject: I've just reached
Date: 13th oct 2006
I know you are surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now, and you are allowed to sent e-mails to your loved ones.
I've just reached and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tommorrow. Looking forward to seeing you.
Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was;
A couple drove down a country road for several miles,
not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position,
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws"
A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load
Of seniors down a highway
When he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady.
She offers him a handful of peanuts,
Which he gratefully munches up.
After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder
Again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.
She repeats this gesture about five more times.
When she is about to hand him another batch again
He asks the little old lady,
" why don`t you eat the peanuts yourself?".
"We can't chew them because we've no teeth", she replied.
The puzzled driver asks,
"Why do you buy them then?"
The old lady replied,
"We just love the chocolate around them ."
From India, Bangalore
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SMS Short Cuts.pdf
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