Hi every body, With this few more jokes surely I hope u will enjoy your weekends with :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Happy Weekends, Dont 4get to check few of our indian minds reply
1) One Punjabi man goes to Chennai to get a job. He gets a job as a waiter in a north Indian restaurant. He did have his shortcomings though.
He always used to argue and he used to get offended with the way everyone teased him about Punjabis.
One day he throws a challenge to a person to see how intelligent he was.
The person asked him a question:
"There are 4 people in my house, 1)my mother, 2)my father, 3)my beautiful wife who is the 4th person?"
The Punjabi thinks... thinks..... and thinks...
Finally he gives up and accepts that all punjabi's are nerds and asks the person the answer.
The Person reples, " 1)my mother, 2)my father, 3)my beautiful wife and 4)me."
After a few months the punjabi goes to back to his homeland for a vacation and tells his experiences to all his friends.
But like him they also argue and accept the challenge for him to ask them any question.
So, the Punjabi waiter asks them the same question and not surprisingly nobody answers.
Then Punjabi waiter tell them the answer, "1) my mother, 2) my father, 3) my beautiful wife and 4) the customer in chennai."
2)Once A Bihari went to Amritsar to see the Golden Temple. Not knowing the way, he asked a Sikh, 'is this the way to the Golden Temple?'
The Sikh replied, 'Aho!'
He did not understand and so he asked another Sikh, 'Is this the way to The Golden temple?'
The Sikh replied, 'Han ji.' This time he understood and asked the Sikh, 'Why he replied Han Ji and why the other replied 'Aho.'
The sikh replied, 'In Punjabi a literate person says 'Han ji,' While an illetrate person says Aho.'
The Bihari then asked ' Oh! So You are a literate person.'
The Sikh replied 'Aho!'
3) Q: Why did sardarji take a ruler to bed?
A: To see how long he slept
4) Q: What will you call a sardaarji who is under water all the time?
A: Jalandhar Singh
5) Q: What will you call a sardaarji if he is the only sardaar alive?
A: Justonesingh (Jashwant Singh)
6) A lie machine is bought.It works in the following way.....
If the truth is told- the machine wont give any sound
If a lie is told- the machine will give a sound 'TNAAAAA...'
Now there are three Indians.One Bengali,one Madrasi and one Sardarji.Their correspondences are given infront of the lie machine.Here it goes......
Bengali:- 'I think I can eat 30 rosogullas at a time!'
Lie machine:-'TNAAAAA...'
Bengali:-'No no, I think I can eat 10 rosogullas at a time'
Lie machine:- no sound(truth is told)
Madrasi:-'I think i can eat 25 dosas at a time'
Lie machine:-'TNAAA...'
Madrasi:-'No no,I think i can eat 10 dosas at a time'
Lie machine:-no sound(truth)
Sardarji:-'I think....'
Lie machine:- 'TNAAAAAA.....'
Sardarji:-'I think...'
Lie machine:-'TNAAAAAAA......'
7) An Indian is calmly having his breakfast when an American, who is chewing gum, sits down beside
him.The Indian ignores the American who begins to chat :
The American asks :'Do you eat the bread entirely?'
The Indian answers,'Of course!'
American : 'We do not .We only eat the inner part.The crust is put in a container and processed
and transformed into flour and sold to Indians.'
The Indian says nothing. The American continues,'Do you eat this jelly with the bread?'
Indian : 'Of course!'
American : 'We do not. We eat fresh fruits for breakfast and then put the seeds and peels into a
container.Later it is processed and transformed to jelly and sold to Indians..'
The Indian finally asks,'And what do you do with the con**ms after using them?'
American : 'We throw them away,of course!'
Indian : 'We do not. We keep them in containers, process them transform them into chewing gum
and sell it to the United States.'
8) God was in the process of creating the universe.
And he was explaining his subordinates ... 'Look everything should be in balance. for every 10 deers, there should be a lion. Look here my fellow angels, here is the country of the United States. I have blessed them with prosperity and money. But at the same time I have given them insecurity and tension.... And here is Africa. I have given them beautiful nature. But at the
same time, I have given them climatic extremes.... And here is South America. I have given them lots of forests. But at the same time , I have given them lesser land so that they would have to cut off the forests... so you see fellows, everything should be in balance. ' One of the angels asked... 'God, what is this beautiful country here?' God said 'Ahah...that is the crown piece of all. INDIA. My most precious creation. They have understanding and friendly people. Sparkling streams, serene mountains. A culture which speaks of the great tradition that they live. Technologically brilliant and with a heart of gold. The angel was quite surprised 'But god you said everything should be in balance.'
God replied 'Look at the neighbours I gave them!'
9) Once a desi Indian fellow from some remote village happened to visit America alone.
Reaching there, he, clad in dhoti kurta, found most of the gentlemen dressed in suits. Unknowingly he just caught a man wearing a tie and asked pointing finger to the tie, 'what is this?', he replied 'It's a neck tie'.
The man then holding the desi man's dhoti from finger asked and what's this.
Desi consciously replied.'Oh its a back tie.'
10) Once a foreigner comes to Mumbai International Airport and takes a taxi.On the way seeing other cars he says that here cars move very slowly.In his country they move very fast.
When his destination arrived he got down and checked the meter.
He asked the driver how did the meter go so high?The driver replied that the reason for the meter to run so fast was that te meter was bought from the foreigner's country!!!
11) An american born Desi returned to India and hired a tourist cab for sight seeing. When taken to the Taj Mahal in Agra, he asked how many years it took to build it. The guide replied 20 years. The American desi remarked You guys are lazy, in America we can build some thing like this in 5 years. At Red Fort in Dehli he asked the same question. The guide reduced the period to impress him and said Ten years. Only ten years The American Desi retorted: Didn’t I say you guys are slow workers! In America we could have built it in 2 1/2 years. Same story everywhere. He admired the places but reduced the period to 1/4th. The guide got irritated by this young American Desi. Next day when they were near Qutab Minar the American Desi asked what is that tower? The guide replied I ‘ll have to go and find out. When I was passing by this side last evening there was nothing here.
From India, Madras
Happy Weekends, Dont 4get to check few of our indian minds reply
1) One Punjabi man goes to Chennai to get a job. He gets a job as a waiter in a north Indian restaurant. He did have his shortcomings though.
He always used to argue and he used to get offended with the way everyone teased him about Punjabis.
One day he throws a challenge to a person to see how intelligent he was.
The person asked him a question:
"There are 4 people in my house, 1)my mother, 2)my father, 3)my beautiful wife who is the 4th person?"
The Punjabi thinks... thinks..... and thinks...
Finally he gives up and accepts that all punjabi's are nerds and asks the person the answer.
The Person reples, " 1)my mother, 2)my father, 3)my beautiful wife and 4)me."
After a few months the punjabi goes to back to his homeland for a vacation and tells his experiences to all his friends.
But like him they also argue and accept the challenge for him to ask them any question.
So, the Punjabi waiter asks them the same question and not surprisingly nobody answers.
Then Punjabi waiter tell them the answer, "1) my mother, 2) my father, 3) my beautiful wife and 4) the customer in chennai."
2)Once A Bihari went to Amritsar to see the Golden Temple. Not knowing the way, he asked a Sikh, 'is this the way to the Golden Temple?'
The Sikh replied, 'Aho!'
He did not understand and so he asked another Sikh, 'Is this the way to The Golden temple?'
The Sikh replied, 'Han ji.' This time he understood and asked the Sikh, 'Why he replied Han Ji and why the other replied 'Aho.'
The sikh replied, 'In Punjabi a literate person says 'Han ji,' While an illetrate person says Aho.'
The Bihari then asked ' Oh! So You are a literate person.'
The Sikh replied 'Aho!'
3) Q: Why did sardarji take a ruler to bed?
A: To see how long he slept
4) Q: What will you call a sardaarji who is under water all the time?
A: Jalandhar Singh
5) Q: What will you call a sardaarji if he is the only sardaar alive?
A: Justonesingh (Jashwant Singh)
6) A lie machine is bought.It works in the following way.....
If the truth is told- the machine wont give any sound
If a lie is told- the machine will give a sound 'TNAAAAA...'
Now there are three Indians.One Bengali,one Madrasi and one Sardarji.Their correspondences are given infront of the lie machine.Here it goes......
Bengali:- 'I think I can eat 30 rosogullas at a time!'
Lie machine:-'TNAAAAA...'
Bengali:-'No no, I think I can eat 10 rosogullas at a time'
Lie machine:- no sound(truth is told)
Madrasi:-'I think i can eat 25 dosas at a time'
Lie machine:-'TNAAA...'
Madrasi:-'No no,I think i can eat 10 dosas at a time'
Lie machine:-no sound(truth)
Sardarji:-'I think....'
Lie machine:- 'TNAAAAAA.....'
Sardarji:-'I think...'
Lie machine:-'TNAAAAAAA......'
7) An Indian is calmly having his breakfast when an American, who is chewing gum, sits down beside
him.The Indian ignores the American who begins to chat :
The American asks :'Do you eat the bread entirely?'
The Indian answers,'Of course!'
American : 'We do not .We only eat the inner part.The crust is put in a container and processed
and transformed into flour and sold to Indians.'
The Indian says nothing. The American continues,'Do you eat this jelly with the bread?'
Indian : 'Of course!'
American : 'We do not. We eat fresh fruits for breakfast and then put the seeds and peels into a
container.Later it is processed and transformed to jelly and sold to Indians..'
The Indian finally asks,'And what do you do with the con**ms after using them?'
American : 'We throw them away,of course!'
Indian : 'We do not. We keep them in containers, process them transform them into chewing gum
and sell it to the United States.'
8) God was in the process of creating the universe.
And he was explaining his subordinates ... 'Look everything should be in balance. for every 10 deers, there should be a lion. Look here my fellow angels, here is the country of the United States. I have blessed them with prosperity and money. But at the same time I have given them insecurity and tension.... And here is Africa. I have given them beautiful nature. But at the
same time, I have given them climatic extremes.... And here is South America. I have given them lots of forests. But at the same time , I have given them lesser land so that they would have to cut off the forests... so you see fellows, everything should be in balance. ' One of the angels asked... 'God, what is this beautiful country here?' God said 'Ahah...that is the crown piece of all. INDIA. My most precious creation. They have understanding and friendly people. Sparkling streams, serene mountains. A culture which speaks of the great tradition that they live. Technologically brilliant and with a heart of gold. The angel was quite surprised 'But god you said everything should be in balance.'
God replied 'Look at the neighbours I gave them!'
9) Once a desi Indian fellow from some remote village happened to visit America alone.
Reaching there, he, clad in dhoti kurta, found most of the gentlemen dressed in suits. Unknowingly he just caught a man wearing a tie and asked pointing finger to the tie, 'what is this?', he replied 'It's a neck tie'.
The man then holding the desi man's dhoti from finger asked and what's this.
Desi consciously replied.'Oh its a back tie.'
10) Once a foreigner comes to Mumbai International Airport and takes a taxi.On the way seeing other cars he says that here cars move very slowly.In his country they move very fast.
When his destination arrived he got down and checked the meter.
He asked the driver how did the meter go so high?The driver replied that the reason for the meter to run so fast was that te meter was bought from the foreigner's country!!!
11) An american born Desi returned to India and hired a tourist cab for sight seeing. When taken to the Taj Mahal in Agra, he asked how many years it took to build it. The guide replied 20 years. The American desi remarked You guys are lazy, in America we can build some thing like this in 5 years. At Red Fort in Dehli he asked the same question. The guide reduced the period to impress him and said Ten years. Only ten years The American Desi retorted: Didn’t I say you guys are slow workers! In America we could have built it in 2 1/2 years. Same story everywhere. He admired the places but reduced the period to 1/4th. The guide got irritated by this young American Desi. Next day when they were near Qutab Minar the American Desi asked what is that tower? The guide replied I ‘ll have to go and find out. When I was passing by this side last evening there was nothing here.
From India, Madras
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