Hello everyone,
I m jitesh dundas, student of MCA from Pune university. I have written a paper on the study of living patterns of Mumbai using its metro system.please read it and send me ur reviews.
thank you
From India
I m jitesh dundas, student of MCA from Pune university. I have written a paper on the study of living patterns of Mumbai using its metro system.please read it and send me ur reviews.
thank you
From India
Hi Jitesh,
Welcome to the site! :)
I am a regular traveller in the same Virar-Churchgate belt that you have studied. So decided to have a look at the research to help you out. Following are my observations:
1. You have used the words "Metro Rail System" for the Mumbai railway system. The word Metro signifies an underground rail system/ subway system which is absent in Mumbai and available only in Delhi and Kolkatta.
2. In the introduction part, bullet point 1, you have said the behaviour of the people can be understood. I doubt if you can really do that just by studying the Railway system of Mumbai. You rightly say that Mumbai is a secular city but more than that it is diverse in not just the secular way. It's so diverse that if a marketeer considers launching a product in Mumbai, he/she will not just rely on the study of Virar to Churchgate belt. A sample study will have to be conducted using portions like Bandra, Andheri, Borivali, Dadar, and even the Central Suburbs like Vashi, Mulund etc. Understanding the behaviour of consumers in just the Virar to Churchgate area may not prove to be feasible. Again, I couldn't really infer anything about the traits and behaviours of the people. It would be best if you took those words out to remain on the safer side.
3. Can you please provide your definition of "Living Patterns" ?
4. Introduction talks about knowing the different market segments and the research paper being useful for marketeers launching products in the region. However, the only product behaviour studied seemed to be the Cell Phones. So you may consider revising the scope to include only cell phones.
5. You have just mentioned the density per square feet and the cost per square feet to be greater or lesser. It's a very subjective term. If it's possible, can you provide with a certain range which can be defined as being "greater" or "lesser" or even better, refine it to make it even more specific.
6. You could probably include a portion on how the railway authorities can improve improve the existing railway infrastructure. Though, don't get too much into the details of it to avoid loosing the focus of the research.
7. In the "Defense of the Model" could you elaborate more on the first pointer as to Mumbai being a commercial capital and having a large English Speaking Population. It sounded a bit incomplete and further explaination would help in making the point more focussed. You could also include statistics on Mumbai's contribution to the Centre, the population of Mumbai (as per 2001 census, it stands at 11.9 million and has a growth rate of 2.4%, a rough 2005 estimate made in a rediff.com article.) Statistics could also strongly support the travelling Population in the Virar-Churchgate belt, as I disagree it could only be thousands of people. You may contact the railway authorities on the same.
8. The Mumbai Railway System does generate a lot of revenue for the Administration but, how much? A figure would add objectivity to the statement. You may also include a paragraph or so on the history of the Mumbai Rail System, with statistics on the population travelling 50 years ago and currently. It will help you to estimate the population growth in the city.
9. In the Methodology portion, you mention Bhayander is a station between Virar and Borivali. If you are considering treating it as a junction point, which I doubt, I don;t understand the reason for citing this fact.
10. You could define the "peak hours" for the towards Churchgate travel and towards Virar travel. The peak hours, to give you a rough idea based on my experience would be 7:30 to 10:00 am, although considerable crowd is found even in the morning hours, as early as 5:30 am. I catch a train 2 stations after Virar and if I don't get in quickly in the 6:21 train, I mostly do not get a seat till Dadar which means I remain standing for one hour! The situation remains worse for the locals starting from the station I get on from, the 8:20, 8:44 where if one doesn't come when the train reaches the station which is typically 10 mins before, he/she may just remain standing till Churchgate, if that is the destination. You could obtain a rough estimate on the number of people travelling during these peak hours, which is definitely the maximum. A large number of travellers in the Virar local get on from the stations between Virar -Borivali
11. You are right that a large number of colleges/schools are present in the Borivali- Dadar belt, but I disagree that students largely travel only between this two stations. Do you have the data/facts to strongly support this statement because experience tells me that a large number of students even travel from stations before Borivali and go upto Dadar, usually, Andheri and Bandra. Engineering students usually go upto Dadar.
12. I completely disagree with your statement that the presence of women is mostly cosmopolitan. I travel in the Ladies' Compartment and at any given time of the day, you would find comparatively more number of women getting on from between Virar to Borivali rather than after Andheri. A study/ statistics on the past and present data of the number of women travellers would prove that the number of women travellers have increased substantially because a large number have started working!
13. Again, the usage of First Class compartments increasing as one moved from Virar to Churchgate. Could you specify whether the usage is between Virar-Borivali or after that. According to me, it's the former. We can feel the beauties of nature, sunlight, air etc only after the majority of the Virar-Borivali population gets down at Andheri.
14. You say the "rural class" presence in Virar-Churchgate and upper class in the Andheri -Churchgate belt. Please check the definition of "rural". It would be a better idea to use the SEC classification rather than rural-urban classification.
15. "The trains are overcrowded and old, needing urgent attention. Some new trains have been added, but still the metro system needs more upgradation. This showed that the City's infrastructure was degrading and was overused. Also, the city is overcrowded and thus, people have started moving to other regions like Navi-Mumbai and Pune, which are seeing high growth rate. The government is trying its best , but the effort needs to increase."
A good observation. Could you please briefly mention the efforts taken by the Government and include certain statistics, if possible, on the population that has shifted to Navi Mumbai and Pune.
16. "The trains are still unsafe and there exists wide-spread corruption in our Railway System. Thus, we need to see that this corruption is controlled so that the system can function properly"
Please give examples to support the unsafe nature of trains although it still is much safer than the other cities. Wide-spread corruption... again statistics would largely help.
17. "In the trains, one can find that in our trains, several minor children are begging or selling things. Thus, this means that Mumbai still has a large number of uneducated and malnourished children who need urgent attention. Thus, care needs to be taken of these children. "
It's good that you reflected this sad state. Also, selling things in the train is illegal. Railway authorities rarely take any action on the same, not to mention the widespread presence of "child labour".
18. Table 4,5,6,7, type of crowd - I hope LR/HR/VHR does not mean lower range/high range/very high range in this case. Please use SEC classification for the same.
I know this reply has been awfully long. But I hope it helped. Let me know if you need any help in the research. Would be glad. :)
Regards,
Vinisha.
From India,
1Welcome to the site! :)
I am a regular traveller in the same Virar-Churchgate belt that you have studied. So decided to have a look at the research to help you out. Following are my observations:
1. You have used the words "Metro Rail System" for the Mumbai railway system. The word Metro signifies an underground rail system/ subway system which is absent in Mumbai and available only in Delhi and Kolkatta.
2. In the introduction part, bullet point 1, you have said the behaviour of the people can be understood. I doubt if you can really do that just by studying the Railway system of Mumbai. You rightly say that Mumbai is a secular city but more than that it is diverse in not just the secular way. It's so diverse that if a marketeer considers launching a product in Mumbai, he/she will not just rely on the study of Virar to Churchgate belt. A sample study will have to be conducted using portions like Bandra, Andheri, Borivali, Dadar, and even the Central Suburbs like Vashi, Mulund etc. Understanding the behaviour of consumers in just the Virar to Churchgate area may not prove to be feasible. Again, I couldn't really infer anything about the traits and behaviours of the people. It would be best if you took those words out to remain on the safer side.
3. Can you please provide your definition of "Living Patterns" ?
4. Introduction talks about knowing the different market segments and the research paper being useful for marketeers launching products in the region. However, the only product behaviour studied seemed to be the Cell Phones. So you may consider revising the scope to include only cell phones.
5. You have just mentioned the density per square feet and the cost per square feet to be greater or lesser. It's a very subjective term. If it's possible, can you provide with a certain range which can be defined as being "greater" or "lesser" or even better, refine it to make it even more specific.
6. You could probably include a portion on how the railway authorities can improve improve the existing railway infrastructure. Though, don't get too much into the details of it to avoid loosing the focus of the research.
7. In the "Defense of the Model" could you elaborate more on the first pointer as to Mumbai being a commercial capital and having a large English Speaking Population. It sounded a bit incomplete and further explaination would help in making the point more focussed. You could also include statistics on Mumbai's contribution to the Centre, the population of Mumbai (as per 2001 census, it stands at 11.9 million and has a growth rate of 2.4%, a rough 2005 estimate made in a rediff.com article.) Statistics could also strongly support the travelling Population in the Virar-Churchgate belt, as I disagree it could only be thousands of people. You may contact the railway authorities on the same.
8. The Mumbai Railway System does generate a lot of revenue for the Administration but, how much? A figure would add objectivity to the statement. You may also include a paragraph or so on the history of the Mumbai Rail System, with statistics on the population travelling 50 years ago and currently. It will help you to estimate the population growth in the city.
9. In the Methodology portion, you mention Bhayander is a station between Virar and Borivali. If you are considering treating it as a junction point, which I doubt, I don;t understand the reason for citing this fact.
10. You could define the "peak hours" for the towards Churchgate travel and towards Virar travel. The peak hours, to give you a rough idea based on my experience would be 7:30 to 10:00 am, although considerable crowd is found even in the morning hours, as early as 5:30 am. I catch a train 2 stations after Virar and if I don't get in quickly in the 6:21 train, I mostly do not get a seat till Dadar which means I remain standing for one hour! The situation remains worse for the locals starting from the station I get on from, the 8:20, 8:44 where if one doesn't come when the train reaches the station which is typically 10 mins before, he/she may just remain standing till Churchgate, if that is the destination. You could obtain a rough estimate on the number of people travelling during these peak hours, which is definitely the maximum. A large number of travellers in the Virar local get on from the stations between Virar -Borivali
11. You are right that a large number of colleges/schools are present in the Borivali- Dadar belt, but I disagree that students largely travel only between this two stations. Do you have the data/facts to strongly support this statement because experience tells me that a large number of students even travel from stations before Borivali and go upto Dadar, usually, Andheri and Bandra. Engineering students usually go upto Dadar.
12. I completely disagree with your statement that the presence of women is mostly cosmopolitan. I travel in the Ladies' Compartment and at any given time of the day, you would find comparatively more number of women getting on from between Virar to Borivali rather than after Andheri. A study/ statistics on the past and present data of the number of women travellers would prove that the number of women travellers have increased substantially because a large number have started working!
13. Again, the usage of First Class compartments increasing as one moved from Virar to Churchgate. Could you specify whether the usage is between Virar-Borivali or after that. According to me, it's the former. We can feel the beauties of nature, sunlight, air etc only after the majority of the Virar-Borivali population gets down at Andheri.
14. You say the "rural class" presence in Virar-Churchgate and upper class in the Andheri -Churchgate belt. Please check the definition of "rural". It would be a better idea to use the SEC classification rather than rural-urban classification.
15. "The trains are overcrowded and old, needing urgent attention. Some new trains have been added, but still the metro system needs more upgradation. This showed that the City's infrastructure was degrading and was overused. Also, the city is overcrowded and thus, people have started moving to other regions like Navi-Mumbai and Pune, which are seeing high growth rate. The government is trying its best , but the effort needs to increase."
A good observation. Could you please briefly mention the efforts taken by the Government and include certain statistics, if possible, on the population that has shifted to Navi Mumbai and Pune.
16. "The trains are still unsafe and there exists wide-spread corruption in our Railway System. Thus, we need to see that this corruption is controlled so that the system can function properly"
Please give examples to support the unsafe nature of trains although it still is much safer than the other cities. Wide-spread corruption... again statistics would largely help.
17. "In the trains, one can find that in our trains, several minor children are begging or selling things. Thus, this means that Mumbai still has a large number of uneducated and malnourished children who need urgent attention. Thus, care needs to be taken of these children. "
It's good that you reflected this sad state. Also, selling things in the train is illegal. Railway authorities rarely take any action on the same, not to mention the widespread presence of "child labour".
18. Table 4,5,6,7, type of crowd - I hope LR/HR/VHR does not mean lower range/high range/very high range in this case. Please use SEC classification for the same.
I know this reply has been awfully long. But I hope it helped. Let me know if you need any help in the research. Would be glad. :)
Regards,
Vinisha.
From India,
HELLO VINISHA ,
MADAM! i am extremely happy that u have studied my paper in sucgh detail. your suggestions and help are precious to me. i will surely make the changes wherever required. plz give me some time to do that.
first of all madam,
1) i am writing my first paper of my life. i am a student with no research background. i wrote this paper because of my interest in HR. on top of it, i m a computer student. plz consider this point too.
2) i will be very happy to listen and consider your suggestions. i will ask u for ur help as and when i need it. thank u very much for that
3)hope u have liked reading the paper. plz keep sending ur view and suggetsions .
thabnking you,
jitesh dundas
From India
MADAM! i am extremely happy that u have studied my paper in sucgh detail. your suggestions and help are precious to me. i will surely make the changes wherever required. plz give me some time to do that.
first of all madam,
1) i am writing my first paper of my life. i am a student with no research background. i wrote this paper because of my interest in HR. on top of it, i m a computer student. plz consider this point too.
2) i will be very happy to listen and consider your suggestions. i will ask u for ur help as and when i need it. thank u very much for that
3)hope u have liked reading the paper. plz keep sending ur view and suggetsions .
thabnking you,
jitesh dundas
From India
Hi Jitesh, Please drop the Madam. I am also a student. I was able to review the paper primarily because I am a regular traveller. Always willing to help you. :) Regards, Vinisha.
From India,
From India,
Hi Vinisha,
Couldn’t help but congratulate you Vinisha for such in depth analysis and a wonderful feedback.
You didn’t sound like a student .
Excellent Analysis.
Well done.
-----
sree
From India, New Delhi
Couldn’t help but congratulate you Vinisha for such in depth analysis and a wonderful feedback.
You didn’t sound like a student .
Excellent Analysis.
Well done.
-----
sree
From India, New Delhi
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